Humans are social animals who thrive on reciprocality. It is in our basic nature to be socially courteous, and the word 'No' feels like a conflict that warns a potential relationship. Many of us tend to comply with every single request that is put forward to us by our peers, family, or at the workplace by our superiors. We choose to take up more jobs than we can efficiently handle and put unnecessary stress on ourselves even at the cost of our time and well-being. Must we always do that? 

Why is it so hard to say 'No'?

People have the notion that saying 'No' can come across as rude or uncaring. You may feel that you are letting someone down by turning down their request or risking a relationship. But, it has mostly to do with your self-confidence than your relationships with people. It may branch from overbearing parents, high expectations set by your peers and mentors or experiencing parenthood yourself and setting unreasonable standards for yourself. Childhood influences are usually the biggest cause of people always saying  yes  all the time.

People who have low self-confidence tend to value their own needs less than the needs of others. Saying 'No' feels rude, and no one wants to be impolite.

Well... saying 'No' does not mean you are being rude or disagreeable.

At the end of the day, it is more about how you say 'no', rather than just saying the word 'No'. Saying 'No' is about valuing and respecting your own time and priorities. 

How to start saying say 'No'?
If you want to take a step back and start saying 'No' to make sure your own needs are valued, here s what you need to do.

Refuse politely, when it seems not possible: Do not overcomplicate responses and try to be as simple in your responses as you can be. If you are asked to do something, and you want to say 'no', try to be polite in your body language and state that it is not convenient for you at the moment and that you would rather get back to it later.
Seek time before committing: The transition from saying  yes  all the time to saying no does take time! Start to give yourself more time and ask people to get back to you later. This way you can begin to build more self-confidence and learn to say no over time. This also allows you to evaluate your response instead of immediately saying yes or no to the person asking the favor or task.
Do not feel guilty: Deep down if you want to do a favor, you can go ahead with it, but you should also understand that it is okay to say no, and there is no need to associate guilt with it. You should set boundaries and allow people around you to understand how much favors they can ask you for instead of presenting you with an endless amount of favors from you.
Set your boundaries: Refusal does not amount to rejection as you have just as much right to say  no  as the person who is asking the favor from you. You are simply turning down a request, and in most situations, there is a middle ground for compromises where both you and the requester can be satisfied. If you have limited time to fulfill a request, let the person know and help out only as much as you can without overstepping your boundaries.
Bringing in these changes can help you be more self-confident, and at the same time enable you to say no when you need to without weighing yourself down with expectations and fear or rejection.

Simple Steps To Help You Say No!

Epilepsy is a form of chronic disorder and it is characterized by recurrent seizures. The episodes of epileptic seizures may differ from person to person. These seizures could be a result of genetic disorder or a result of trauma or stroke. During a seizure, a patient may also experience symptoms of neurological disorders and sometimes lose consciousness.

Medical help for epilepsy
Epilepsy itself cannot be cured using medication, but proper medicines help in eliminating recurrent seizures. These medicines stabilize the electrical activity within the brain preventing seizures.

How effective is the medication for epilepsy?
The success of controlling seizures using medicines depends on the type and severity of the epilepsy. Medicines for epilepsy are usually very effective and may fully keep seizures under control. However, controlling seizures caused due to brain problems may be more difficult. Usually, epilepsy medicines can control seizures for a long period of time when they are taken regularly.

When is medical help needed?
The decision about when to start medicines for epilepsy is a tricky one. This is because a first seizure cannot confirm whether a person has an on-going epilepsy problem. A second seizure may occur after many years or may not happen at all. Prediction of seizures is also quite difficult.

The severity of seizures also indicates when to start medicines for treatment. In case a first seizure is quite severe, medication should be started at once. Some people have very mild seizures even though they may be recurring in nature, and medication can be avoided in this situation.

All the pros and cons must be thought over before starting medications for the treatment of epilepsy. It is advisable to wait for a second seizure and then start medications for treatment. In most cases, medication is started after a second seizure occurs, twelve months within the first seizure. You should always consult a doctor to know when you need to start taking medicines to treat the condition.

For making the most out of the medicines to control seizures, you should follow certain steps:
1. You must take medications exactly as your doctor has prescribed.
2. Before switching to generic versions of your medicines or before taking other prescribed medicines, you must consult your doctor.
3. You should never stop taking the medicines.
4. In case you experience enhanced depression, mood swings and suicidal thoughts, you should talk to your doctor immediately.
5. In case you have migraine, you should let your doctor know so that he can prescribe you anti-epileptic medicines, which also prevent migraines.

Medicines cannot treat the underlying cause of epilepsy, but these help in controlling seizures and this is the most common symptom of epilepsy. Medication should be started at a proper time and must be continued without stopping.

When to Seek Medical Help for Epilepsy

Autism is a development disorder which is characterized by the problems that occurred while interacting with people socially. And, sometimes the person's behavior becomes repetitive or restricted. This is basically caused by a combination of environmental and genetic factors. Several risk factors are also there such as rubella or valproic acid infection during pregnancy.  Autism affects the process of sending information to the brain by changing the synapses of the nerve cells. However, the signs of autism often evolve slowly usually parents notice these signs in the initial years of their child's life.


Symptoms of Autism
Autism is basically a very highly unstable neurodevelopmental disorder which appears initially during infancy and then firmly follows without remission. And, the eating behavior might also be unusual at times.

People affected with autism might be severely impaired in some way or they might be evenly superior in other ways.
Some symptoms begin gradually after for 6 months and becomes well established by the course of time when they reach the age of 2 to 3 years and steadily continuous through adulthood.
Symptoms of individual occur basically within the general population and it pretty much appears not to be associated itself highly, separating common traits from being pathologically severe.
Infants with autism show very little attention towards social affection and tend to smile less often and take time to respond to their own name.
Children who are affected by Autism that functions frequently, often subjected to intense loneliness if compared to the non-autistic children.
Sometimes behaviors on these children might be self-injurious like biting its own hand or banging its head, poking their own eyes.
The daily activities might not vary at all like them and not tend to change the menu or how they dress.
Treatment for Autism
When a child is being treated with autism, then the main goal to lessen the deficit and the distress of the family and improving your child's quality of life. Some medications also used to treat the symptoms of ASD. Some common drugs, antidepressants or stimulants or antipsychotics suggest aripiprazole or risperidone. There must also be a specific teaching method that will help the autistic child to learn some significant social skills that will encourage him or her to interact more with others. 


Autism Signs Parents Need To Be Aware Of!


A new relationship involves a lot of weighing from both the sides. Learn what really matters to win people over in this post. When you want to build a new relationship, whether it is for work, business, personal, marriage, friendship etc there are several factors that help take off and bloom the relationship. These factors are broadly the same in different age groups as far as psychological impact matters. Some of the most important influential factors from a psychological point of view have been highlighted here. 

1. Presentation- When you want to draw someone into relationship with you for any reason, it is important that you present yourself at you best levels be it physical or mental. Like they say that the first impression is the best impression, your display of you strengths creates an impression that helps people decide what they want to do with you. This doesn't mean you should hide all your weaknesses but highlighting your strengths is as important as making your weaknesses clear. Always learn to put your best foot forward as sometimes that itself may not be enough. You can't really send your neighbour for your job interview!! There are many instances when people send different photographs in their applications and different ones appear for the exams. This is mere cheating and not winning.

2. Plan – Let people know what you want to do with them and what they can they can do with you. No one can say they don’t have a plan. There is always some plan. Knowing it strengthens why you want to have that relationship in the first place. Otherwise it's like something which is there but you can never want to do anything with! When you are honest with your plans and they workout as you described it, it creates confidence in relationship or else it is destroyed forever. You can cheat a person with your plans once, not forever.

3. Possibilities- Will this relationship bring me trouble? Obviously nobody wants to get into a relationship with anybody that brings them trouble be it physical or mental. Next question is whether it will benefit me? Small or big depends on person's needs. Some relationships neither bring us trouble nor benefits us, such relationships are better than the ones which can cause harm.

4. Potential – Question. Does this relationship you are trying to develop have any possibilities of growth a few or many years down the line. Obviously we have a lot of friends who wither by passing of time. Does this relationship have an expiry date irrespective of how well or bad it goes? Like when we join college we know for sure that the friends will be with us till the duration of the course and that's it. We will know that if we study together it will help us achieve great grades in college and hence a great life later. These kind of growth possibilities or possibilities of deterioration are important to be well aware of and will naturally decide the course of relationships.

5. Progress – No matter what our initial assessments are, how the relationships helps us fare in the outside world will ultimately decide the future of any relationship. Loss, sorrow, tragedy, degradation in any aspect of life, insults, injury, loss of health etc will never help any relationship continue or last.

6. Partnerships – When we want to build a relationship with someone, the best way to do it is to obviously partner with that person in as many activities as possible. The more interested a person is the more activities that person will involve you in and try to do it with you. This type of partnership activities, be it spending a few hours in the evening, or a few minutes on phone, or an association of months or years are a foolproof way to show you are interested. Conversely a person who doesn't partner with you in anything is extremely unlikely to ever have any sort of relationship with you. Partnership in activities is the only way to show and know that you are interested or the other person is interested respectively. After all chasing the moon, stars and rainbow are activities of people who don’t realize its out of their reach. Sensible people are busy with what their eyes see, hands feel, ears listen, tongue tastes and thinking perceives as appropriate.

7. Positioning attitudes- As a tree bends with the winds to prevent from cracking, we all have to be flexible with our attitudes towards each other. Being too rigid about our protocol on how relationships should run irrespective of the reality and circumstances of the person we are having a relationship with is naturally going to break relationships. After all a doctor who heals and prevents all illnesses is better than a doctor who abuses his patients for falling ill but never does anything for them. Eg: You get bed and good food in a hotel as well as at your home. A hotel will provide food only on payment of money, but family will provide it whenever your hungry. Hence hotels can never expect the same emotions as family can, and this is as natural as it should be. Hence be careful what you want from a relationship. Whether you want to be treated as a hotel or family is entirely how you play yourself with others. After all only families can expect loyalty not hotels.

8. Politeness- In any relationship, many years down the line, what our long term memory retains is how comfortable we were in that relationship. Even if we profit from a particular relationship, the fact that it shook us mentally and emotionally will never allow us to go back or retain that relationship. Life is short and the only thing that matters is to spend it comfortably. Not destroy our peace for some benefit that destroys our peace of mind.

9. Personation- While sending a representative of your organization for a client meeting may work in business, you cant really send a representative to meet you wife or kids at home. In personal relationship, lack of your physical presence obviously means that you don’t have time for them. In any relationship, individuality matters a lot. Just imagine, if all actors acted exactly the same in movies, why would you prefer any particular one over the other as your favourite? The nuances and differences in our personalities are what makes us all unique. We are not robots from a particular brand to behave exactly the same way. If a person in a relationship doesn't sense your individuality you are wasting their time by trying to have a relationship with them, especially a personal one.

10. Positive reinforcement- When we get into a relationship, it is important that we feel good about ourselves and what we are doing. If you feel like a shoplifter entering a shop, you will not feel good about that relationship. When a shopkeeper welcomes us, shows us his products, tells us their details and provides all the explanations on how we will be well off with the product, provides his guarantee for it, confirms its essence, many people buy it even if they don’t compulsively need it. It’s the same in relationships. On the same side if a shopkeeper is arrogant, avoidant, abusive, insulting etc you are very unlikely to buy anything in that shop because you are not sure that the shopkeeper means any good and will be happy with the shopkeeper s product. The experience of buying is as important as the product we buy. Nobody is happy about something they got when they weren't treated the right way or is interested in retaining it when they don’t get good service for it.

11. Persistence on all Ps – Obviously when we want relationships to last, we need to be persistent on all the above P's. Otherwise it wont take long for a relationship to be counted in “once upon a time”!! A simple conversation even if for a few minutes every now and then when you need it may make it seem that you are still there for a person. Without even that people may even find it hard to remember that they even had something to do with you sometime before keeping in mind the the numerous activities we involve daily to maintain our lifestyles.

“KNOWING IS DOING AND NOT KNOWING IS UNDOING EVEN IF DOING!”

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How To Win Over New Relationships

Dementia refers to the progressive loss of memory in a human being. It does not refer to any particular disease. It is rather a cumulative representation of symptoms which signify that the person is losing his or her memory. Dementia occurs in seven stages. Read on to read more about them:

In the first stage, there is no cognitive decline and the person is mentally sound. There is no memory loss as well.
In the second stage, there is a very mild cognitive decline leading to normal forgetfulness that is often associated with progressing age.
In the third stage, there is a mild cognitive decline. The person has an increased forgetfulness and may find it difficult to concentrate on things.
In the fourth stage, there is moderate cognitive decline and the person starts forgetting even the most recent events. They cannot even travel alone or manage their own finances.
In the fifth stage, there is moderately severe cognitive decline. The person going through this stage often requires help even with their daily activities. People tend to forget even the most common things like phone and email passwords.
In the sixth stage, there is severe cognitive decline. This stage is also called middle dementia and there is prominent memory loss. People cannot even count from 1 to 10. Their speech becomes slurry. They also start having delusions.
In the seventh stage, there is very severe cognitive decline. This stage is also called late dementia. The psychomotor skills are also lost at this stage and the person may not even be able to walk properly.
Some of the early signs of dementia are listed below:

In the initial days of dementia, the person usually tends to get confused when it comes to choosing the right words. This makes them take much longer time to conclude their speech.
There might also be a change in the mood of the person.
Depression is also one of the early signs.

The person will have a tendency to forget even the most recent events that took place in his or her life. This means that they might remember what happened ten years before but they might not remember what they did in the morning.
Early signs also include failure to sense directions. People often tend to forget their addresses and the landmarks and thus become lost when they travel alone.
Confusion is also one of the common signs and this is directly correlated to the loss of memory because when a person cannot remember familiar faces, it leads to a lot of confusion within his own mind.
So, if you suspect that someone in your house is suffering from dementia, then you must look out for these early signs and seek medical help immediately. Early treatment can keep the condition from worsening.

Dementia - Stages and Early Signs!

Do you have someone who is passive-aggressive in your life? Perhaps your parents, your siblings, your partner or your friends? It can be difficult to handle such a person. When two people, who are having a healthy relationship with each other are angry with each other, they show anger, they say that they are upset, they discuss things and sort things out. There are so many different ways to express anger. But when it comes to a person with passive-aggressive behaviour, it is not going to be the same when they are angry. This is basically a way to express anger indirectly, as they are unable to or uncomfortable to express their feelings and anger openly.

They need help, and it is you who will be able to help them get out of this pain or anger. Here are six steps to changing someone's passive-aggressive behaviour:

When there is an argument going on between both of you or when one of you is angry, do not say something or do something negative. This will make them shut down completely and they will never open up. It may also happen that the situation gets worse. So, take some time and calm down.
Do not go for any guesswork. You are trying to help someone to get over his/her passive-aggressive behaviour. You need to know what they actually feel. So, ask them how they feel and if they have anything to say about it. This can help them open up.
Brainstorming can be one of the best steps. Yes, if you think that you often argue on some common point, then you need to come up with a solution for it first. Ask for their opinion, make a list of all the points and try to make it as detailed as possible.
Check out the pros and cons of your opinions. When you are done with brainstorming, you need to consider each opinion or decision you made in order to make sure that both of you are comfortable with it.
Choose a win-win situation. In other words, pick up those solutions which make both of you happy.
Execute your opinion or plan and evaluate if it is working for you. If plan A does not work for you, then you can still consider the other options that you left behind to draft a plan B.
Communication is very important and when you are able to communicate well, you will be able to get what you actually need. You should start to think that your feelings are valid and learn to enjoy how good it feels when others value your feelings. Open up and talk!

Passive Aggressive Nature - 6 Things You Can Do To Help!

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