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With kids entering the marriage scene, most couples end up in a routine that primarily revolves around the kids. The intimacy levels nosedive with no time, energy, or the privacy left for private moments. While some people just resign to it as normal course of marriage, others can get frustrated and even look for ways to please themselves outside marriage. The good news is that one need not lose hope. While taking care of children definitely comes as a responsibility, it need not take away all your pleasures of a married life. There can still be a good sexual relationship; all it requires is a little bit of planning and conscious attempts from both partners.
- Planned dates: Leave your baby with either a good friend of a family member (grandparents, uncles or aunts) and take some time out at least once a month. This gives you time away from the never-ending responsibility of kids. While you are assured that the child is safe with the short-term babysitter, you get complete private space and time to be with your partner. The wonders this can do are to be seen to be believed.
- Separate child’s bedroom: This not only gives you the required privacy, it also helps by instilling some good manners in the child. Early on in life, it knows that it has its own space and the parents, theirs. While there can be occasional days when the child can doze off to sleep with the parents, it has to spend the night in its own bed. With privacy being one of the main reasons for lack of parents, this will take care of it.
- Winding up early for the day: While the list of things to do never seems to end, you need to put a stop to it to say, that is all you can manage for the day. Going to bed tired and drained for the day is definitely not going to help your sex life. It is absolutely fine to leave a couple of things to do for tomorrow, so you can go to bed with some energy left for romance.
- Small talk, but not about the small ones: While kids do engulf your life, make a conscious attempt to talk about something else. It could be a movie or a book or something that happened in office or home, but not about the kids. This can pep you both up unbelievably and do wonders for rekindling the love in your life.
While kids definitely are the center of your lives, take some time out for yourselves. It works wonders for the relationship, making the other person feel important and loved, and of course, it is mutual.
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