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Love Addiction Tips

Get Relief from Addiction

Masters In Psychology , CBT - Cognitive Behavioral Therapy , REBT Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy, BArch
Psychologist, Thane
Get Relief from Addiction

Usually the addict never comes to therapy. Its the family who thinks they need this. It's difficult to break news that its not just the addict that need to change. The chance also required in the approach of family to them. Addicts crave for love and approval of friends.

5 people found this helpful

Sexual Addiction

Dr. Rajesh Tewari 90% (5162 ratings)
Diploma in Paediatrics, MBBS
Sexologist, Dehradun
Sexual Addiction

Definition of Sex Addiction

Sex addiction can refer to a range of behaviors that are done in excess and significantly impact one’s life in a negative way.

  • The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders-V (DSM-5) does not list sex addiction as a diagnosable condition yet, but research indicates that there is a clear prevalence of adverse sexual behavior that is similar in development to a “chemical” addiction.

Is Porn Addiction the Same as Sex Addiction?

Porn addiction and sex addiction are not the same disorder. Addiction to porn is considered to be a type of sex addiction and can manifest itself differently than other types of sex addiction. Like “sex addiction,” “porn addiction” is not an official diagnosis in the DSM-5 yet. However, an addiction to porn can lead to serious distress and consequences in many facets of life.

What Are the Different Types of Sexual Addictions?

There are no distinct categories, but sexual addictions can come in different forms, including addiction to:

  • Pornography.
  • Prostitution.
  • Masturbation or fantasy.
  • Sadistic or masochistic behavior.
  • Exhibition/Voyeurism.
  • Other excessive sexual pursuits.

What are the Signs, Symptoms, and Effects of a Sexual Addiction?

Several signs can serve to indicate whether someone is addicted to sex. These can be emotional or physical. Furthermore, it’s important to know the debilitating effects of sexual addiction. 

Emotional Symptoms of Sex Addiction

If you or someone you love suffers from a sex addiction, you might not have healthy boundaries. If your husband is addicted to pornor sex, you may feel alienated, isolated, depressed, angry, or humiliated and need treatment yourself. If you are addicted to sex, you might become easily involved with people sexually or emotionally regardless of how well you know them, according to Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous. Because most sex addicts fear being abandoned, they might stay in relationships that aren’t healthy, or they may jump from relationship to relationship. When alone, they might feel empty or incomplete. They might also sexualize feelings like guilt, loneliness or fear.

Physical Symptoms of Sex Addiction

Although a sex addiction or pornography addiction can create many physical side effects, few physical symptoms of this disorder exist. However, the most common physical sex addict symptoms you might notice from having a sexual addiction is feeling immobilized due to sexual or emotional obsessions.

Effects of Sex Addiction

The effects of a sex addiction can be severe.

  • According to Departmental Management of the USDA, about 38% of men and 45% of women with sex addictions have a venereal disease as a result of their behavior.
  • Pregnancy is also a common side effect that can occur due to risky behavior. In one survey, nearly 70% of women with sex addictions reported they’d experienced at least one unwanted pregnancy as a result of their addiction.

Additionally, sex addiction likely has a negative impact on several areas of one’s life. It can lead to:

  • A decline in personal relationships, social, and family engagement.
  • Decreased concentration and productivity at work.
  • Physical consequences like sexual dysfunction or sexually transmitted diseases (STDs).

It can have profound psychological effects, like generating feelings of shame, inadequacy, and emotional distress. It can lead to, or stem from, comorbid psychological disorders like:

  • Anxiety.
  • Depression.
  • Substance abuse.
  • Problems related to impulse control and emotion dysregulation.
  • Obsessive-Compulsive type symptoms.

It is important to know that addressing co-occurring problems in one’s life, like depression, social anxiety, or social isolation, can make it easier to recover from sexual addiction.

Am I Addicted to Sex?

It is best to consult with a healthcare professional for proper evaluation of your sex addiction, however, you may also want to look out for the following signs:

  • You feel powerless over how you act sexually.
  • Your sexual choices are making your life unmanageable.
  • You feel shame, embarrassment or even self-loathing over your sexual acts.
  • You promise yourself you’ll change, but fail to keep those promises.
  • You’re so preoccupied with sex it becomes like a ritual to you.
1 person found this helpful

Are You Addicted To Your Smartphone?

Dr. Sarfaraz Alam 89% (578 ratings)
DHMS (Diploma In Homeopathic Medicine & Surgery)
Homeopath, Dhanbad
Are You Addicted To Your Smartphone?

The advent of smartphones has made mobile phones far more pervasive in your life. You can now remain connected with friends and family on social media for much longer, share your life events through pictures and videos, stay on track with professional information and generally remain updated about information from all around the world. However, this constant barrage of information and the over dependence on the smartphone for work and personal affairs has taken epidemic proportions where people are unable to log off. It has now been classified as a general anxiety disorder commonly known as nomophobia which is "the fear or being away from your cellphone".

Addiction and the validity of Nomophobia

While cell phone addiction is a valid disorder, the designation of nomophobia is loosely attributed to the anxiety disorders connected to not being able to use cell phones. It’s less of a phobia and more of an addiction as you cannot be without it. These can be better enumerated by the typical symptoms when not being able to use a mobile phone.

Symptoms of mobile phone addiction: 

  1. The ability to spend hours and hours on the cell phone without realizing how much time has passed by.
  2. Forced attempts to separate from the cell phone result in more time being spent with it (akin to a drug addiction).
  3. Incremental usages in a number of hours as you end up spending more and more hours on the phone.
  4. Personal and professional lives being hampered due to excessive mobile phone usage.
  5. Surfacing of withdrawal symptoms such as irritability, restlessness, anger and depression.

How mobile phone addiction affects people?

Different age groups are affected differently by mobile phone addiction; although some of the symptoms are fairly common. The effect tends to be far more severe on children and teenagers. Let’s look at how different age groups are affected by mobile phone addiction:

Children – Increasingly, younger children are carrying cellphones, especially smartphones. This tends to disrupt their lives as they get easily distracted and thus addicted to chatting with friends and connecting on social media. With children, appetite as well as mental development, is also hindered. In a study in the U.K., it was found that young children with mobile phones had less nutritional intake and thus had lesser and slower physical development than normal. It also affects their eyes. Direct exposure to blue light – like the one that comes from cellphone screens – can cause damage to the retina of the eye.

Teenagers –

  • Development: Apart from the similar problems mentioned with children, the performance in school tends to suffer the most along with other developmental disabilities in the brain. The human brain is still forming till the age of 25 and many of the finer faculties that develop during the teenage years get badly affected. Holistic development like hobbies, sports, communication skills are greatly hindered.
  • Information overload: Teenagers also tend to be very impressionable and thus are at a risk of predation from sources all-round the internet. While aggressively watching porn, the adolescent brain is being shaped around a sexual experience that is isolating, visceral, and completely void of any love or compassion. This has the potential to lead to great problems in sexual compulsivity and sex addiction throughout the adolescent boy's life because his brain gets shaped to expect the "heroin-like" porn dopamine rush from all of his real-life sexual experiences. 
  • Peer pressure: Teenagers seek more and more expensive phones in order to compete or to fit in with the crowd. this not only puts more financial strain on the parents but also leads to disharmony at home.
  • Friends! Let's stay connected: Very often parents complain that their teenager can do nothing else but sit by their mobile phone waiting for calls or text messages. They no longer communicate with family members and its not uncommon! Catching teenagers staying up till early hours of the morning texting or talking with friends. Their studies greatly suffer, hobbies no longer take priority and problems like irritability, poor concentration, bunking classes and other health issues are on alarming rise due to lack of sleep.
  • Emotional issues: In the era where assignments, notes, outing plans, party invites and important messages are passed on in Whatsapp groups. Getting a phone call or a text message implies an importance, ‘Somebody wants Me’!! It boosts the receivers self-esteem and self-worth. The phone also feeds the desire for attention, acceptability and satisfies a teenager’s emotional drive.
  • Life on Social media: Nowadays teenagers are more focussed on their Vitual lives rather than enjoying the real moments. Their Life and happiness is all about social display of every single activity and number of likes and comments on posted pictures/ status.This is particularly true for teenagers who are struggling with their identity and social status. Phone usage does not only increase the opportunity to bond with friends and to organise a social life on the move, it also provides a symbol for acceptance. This is important to a teenager’s individuality and confidence. The mobile phone feeds the personal requirements of a teenager - they provide a sense of worth ensuring popularity.
  • Strained relation with parents: A great number of teens do not let anyone touch their phones. Most teenagers turn rebellious and aggressive when parents try to limit their mobile usage. When they lose their phones, they show signs of aggression which results in constant mood swings, feeling of unhappiness, and irritation on little things.

Adults – Adults, in general, tend to suffer more from disruptions at work as well as problems in their personal lives. Shortening of attention spans, irritable behavior, fatigue, inability to communicate, breakdowns in spousal relationships or even with friends and family are fairly common consequences. However, the biggest concern is the contribution to depression and anxiety which may run into non-mobile phone related extensive disorders as well.

  • Communication Gap in Marriage: Believe it or not, smartphones are damaging and even ending relationships. If you are emotionally attached to your smartphone and rely on it every waking minute, it may be harming your relationship. Psychologists claim that increasing numbers of people in long-term partnerships are having to compete with their partner’s smartphone for attention, making it the ‘third wheel’ in their relationship. A survey found that almost three quarters of women in committed relationships feel that smartphones are interfering with their love life and are reducing the amount of time they spend with their partner. Spouses spend more time in social networkings like Whatsapp, Facebook and days passby without talking to each other. Do you really remember your spouse's phone number or have you just saved it in your iPhone?
  • Impact on Child Bearing: Parents stay so busy with their mobiles that they don't spend quality time with their children and fill in the Lacunae by splurging on costly gifts and give them tablets/TV for passing kissing their spare time. 

Mobile Use During Driving And Safety Hazards

There is considerable concern that using a mobile phone while driving creates a significant accident risk, to the user and to other people on the road, because it distracts the driver, impairs their control of the vehicle and reduces their awareness of what is happening on the road around them. When using a hand-held mobile phone, drivers must remove one hand from the steering wheel to hold and operate the phone. They must also take their eyes off the road, at least momentarily, to pick up and put down the phone and to dial numbers.While using a hand-held phone, the driver must continue to simultaneously operate the vehicle (steer, change gear, use indicators, etc) with only one hand.

Some tips for de-addiction

Some easy tips that you can follow to start your de–addiction process are mentioned below –

  1. Ensure that the first 30 minutes of the day after waking up are only for you. Don’t be tempted to look at the phone immediately after you wake up.
  2. Create specific no phone time zones in a day where no matter how big the urge is, you don’t check your phone. These could be during any time of the day and try incrementally stretching the amount of time that you can be without your phone each time.
  3. Use driving as an excuse to turn off your phone. This not only helps in fighting addiction but also lowers the chances of automobile accidents caused due to distracted driving.
  4. Keep a cutoff time for phone usage and switch your phone off at least an hour before your hit the sack. This will stop you from playing late night games and help you sleep better as well. When you feel the urge to check your phone, close your eyes and take a deep breath.

In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!

7606 people found this helpful

Improve Your Love Life!

Dr. Ritesh Chawla 88% (1123 ratings)
B.A.M.S, M.D In Ayurvedic Medicine
Ayurveda, Amritsar
Improve Your Love Life!

It is normal to be disinterested in engaging in sexual activity from time to time owing to the variation in libido levels in the body of an individual. However, disinterest in sex can be a cause of concern if it goes on for a long period. This could be due to stress or an underlying health condition. 

Inactive sex drive can be frustrating for both the partners and can play a havoc in your married life if not attended to the early stages. Though it is a common occurrence in people as they age but this condition has now become very prominent in people of a much younger age. Let us look at some of the causes and the possible solutions. 

The causes of low libido/sex drive

Sex drive is something that starts from your brain and leads to the other organs. It is a sync of your organs that results in a climax. Like most human traits sexual drive also varies from person to person. Most of the men have a normal sex urge while some of them are hyperactive. They get addicted to it and could never get enough of it and some of the men do have low sexual urges. The biggest reasons for low libido levels could be stress followed by medical conditions. Apart from it, the family surroundings and the environment can all play a role in the sex drive. In some rare cases, the loss of libidocan be a genuine case of low testosteronelevels. 

Stress can play havoc with such symptoms and since your brain is pressured it may not work in sync with your reproductive organs. The other factors can include medical conditions such as diabetes, cholesterol, and high blood pressure. Hormones too play an important role in the sex drive and the lower hormone levels can lead to a low sex drive. It often comes with age and as a person ages his urges start to diminish and he may be unable to perform and satisfy. 

Treatment

Every cause of low sexual desire has its own treatment plan. Most of the cases also involve psychology counseling as a part of its treatment plans. Sex therapy may be imparted to men who lack in the techniques and the strategies for getting their composure back. In case if it has been identified that the lack of libido is due to purely low testosterone, the people can try out herbal testosterone boosters for increasing their libido. However, these herbs or herbo mineral compounds should be taken only under the care of a medical supervisor and not privately as it can lead to complications. Men can even opt for psychological counseling sessions if their problems are identified on a much more personal level. Their family related issues and their compatibility with their partners can be brought under discussion and treatment plans can be charted out based on it.

1 person found this helpful

Love Yourself

M. D. ( NeuroPsychiatry)
Psychiatrist, Alwar
Love Yourself

Stop mentally abusing yourself. Stop agonizing over your past mistakes and worrying about the future. Life is hard enough without the added fear, panic and anxiety. Your soul is crying out for love and encouragement. Take a moment to breathe deep, get present and find some compassion for yourself. Then, go out and treat yourself right; pamper yourself and take care of your needs. You are worth it"

 

3 people found this helpful

Overview of sex addiction

Dr. Rahman 91% (820 ratings)
Bachelor of Unani Medicine and Surgery (B.U.M.S)
Sexologist, Chennai
Overview of sex addiction
Overview of sex addiction

An addiction is a dependence on a certain substance, activity, or behavior. There are many different types of addictions, including dependencies on over-the-counter (otc) and prescription medications, illegal drugs, alcohol, and tobacco products. Sex addiction is a psychological disorder that involves an unhealthy preoccupation with sexuality or an obsession with sexual activity and/or romantic love.

Sex addiction also is called
Sexual addiction
Love addiction
Hypersexuality
Compulsive sexual behavior
Sexual compulsion
Nymphomania

The term erotomania is used to describe a delusion (false belief or expectation) of being loved by a particular person.

Sexual addiction usually begins as normal, healthy sexuality; however, sex addicts experience chemical and physical (i. E, physiological) changes in the brain that result in an inability to control sexual urges and behavior. For people who are addicted to sex, sexual desire (arousal) and sexual pleasure often replace close, loving (i. E, intimate) relationships. In many cases, sex addicts use sexual behavior to avoid dealing with painful feelings, such as loneliness, low self-esteem, and fear of rejection.

Differences in the way human sexually is viewed in various cultures, societies, and religions throughout the world make it difficult to develop a universal definition of sex addiction. Therefore, overall incidence and prevalence of the condition is not easy to determine.

Sexual addiction occurs in both men and women. It is diagnosed more often in men, but this may be because women seek treatment for sex addiction less frequently. Sex addiction may be more common today than in the past. This may be related to the widespread availability of the internet, which provides easy access to pornography (i. E, pornographic websites) and opportunities for cybersex (i. E, virtual sexual relationships conducted through computers), and sexual images in the media (e. G, television, movies, music videos).

Sexual addiction can occur in people of any sexual orientation (also called sexual preference). People who have sexual relationships with members of the opposite gender (i. E, heterosexuals), people who have sexual relationships with members of the same gender (i. E, homosexuals), and people who have sex with members of both genders (i. E, bisexuals) may develop an addiction to sex.
15 people found this helpful

Addiction - How Should You Help Your Kids Get Over It?

Dr. P Gupta 89% (10 ratings)
Ph. D - Psychology
Psychologist, Jammu
Addiction - How Should You Help Your Kids Get Over It?

Drug addiction is a major problem in today's world. The major part of these drug abuse victims are teenagers. There are several reasons may drive your teen kid to hard drugs which include peer pressure, neglect, curiosity or just for the sake of being cool. This could be a major concern for the parents whose children get addicted to drugs but an important thing to keep in mind is that the only person who can help your kid overcome addiction are the parents.

Here are a few measures that can help your kid overcome drug addiction:

  1.  In order to put your kids on the right path, the most important thing is to show them love. You should keep aside your anger, fear and grief and approach them. Tell them why you are scared or angry. Proper love and affection is required to bring your kids back to the normal track.
  2. Try to find their strengths and weakness. Your child should be complemented for any good thing he or she does. You should observe them properly and try to perceive their current nature and mental state.
  3. You should try to keep your calm and talk to them instead of scolding, shouting or threatening them. You must also listen to them carefully and try not to react in any way. Talk to them about your concerns and see whether they are cooperating with you.
  4. Getting your kids involved in some activity, which will let them mix with a different group of peers will be a positive remedy. You have to make them feel good about themselves. Try to find ways so that your kids will get into some positive, productive activity.
  5. Fixing an appointment with a psychiatrist who deals with drug abuse situations can also help you deal with the issue. You must explain to your kids that there is an obvious reason behind their addiction, and it must be solved for their own good.
  6. You should also connect with the counselors at schools and colleges. They have seen many cases like your child’s and know about the situation well. You can enroll your kids in a substance abuse program which is connected with his school.
  7. You must tell your kids that what they are doing is risky and illegal and as parents, you have the right to help them overcome this in order to maintain good health, and that you do not want them to go to prison.
  8. Find an expert therapist specializing in teen substance abuse and make your kids have weekly appointments with him. A good therapist knows the best ways to guide your kids to the right path.

Drug addiction in kids is a common syndrome these days. If your kid is into hard drugs, you need to do your best to save him and help him overcome the addiction. In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!

4104 people found this helpful

How Does Drug Addiction Happen? How To De-Addict Yourself?

Dr. Patil S D 91% (135 ratings)
M.A. Psychology, PHD
Psychologist, Pune
How Does Drug Addiction Happen? How To De-Addict Yourself?

Addiction is the absolute dependency on a particular substance or situation. Substance addiction includes a variety of substances apart from alcohol and drugs. Examples include porn, food, chocolate, nicotine, etc. Situation addiction includes gambling, shopping and sex among others. The problem in our society with addiction is it is treated like a choice than as a major problem faced by an individual. De-addiction is the process of ridding the individual of his dependence on certain substances or activities.

Process-

  1. Rehabilitation psychology studies the process of de-addiction and helps addicts blend with the normal lifestyle. Rehab centers offer several forms of therapy to reduce substance usage.
  2. Group therapy is always the go to form of therapeutic technique to deal with cases of addiction owing to the common feeling among users that people who aren’t addicted and do not know what they’re going through. In those cases, it is rather important to have support from a group of people who are exactly where they are.
  3. Family therapy is also essential to make the individual know how their loved ones feel and also remind them of the unconditional support. Some rehab centers also use the horse therapy (focuses on interaction with horses which facilitates emotional and occupational development in patients) which is rather interesting to witness.
  4. In addition to therapy, rehab centers teach life skills and cooperation. Apart from all this, drugs are also prescribed to deal with addiction along with the weekly scheduled personal therapy sessions.

Although an unfamiliar concept in India, halfway homes are the next step after the rehab. The individuals learn different skills and ways to manage themselves outside the house while still continuing their therapy. This is done to make sure one doesn’t relapse right after the rehabilitation has been completed. Most rehabs also suggest support group meetings. Even otherwise support groups are extremely effective in the de-addiction process. ‘Alcoholics Anonymous’ and ‘Narcotics Anonymous’ are two of the most widely managed support groups around the world.

Addiction is an immense issue which has spiraled out of control in today’s times. However, it is necessary to understand it isn’t the question of the individual’s morality. The removal of labels and stigma is essential in the entire process. Support from loved ones is an extremely important step towards de-addiction, right after the acceptance that one is addicted.

In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!

2440 people found this helpful

Understanding Relationship Addiction!

Dr. Akshata Bhat 97% (2092 ratings)
MBBS, MD - Psychiatry
Psychiatrist, Mumbai
Understanding Relationship Addiction!

Addiction can be of different types. While some may be addicted to the internet and social media, others may be addicted to shopping. Likewise, a person may be addicted to relationships. But what is a relationship addiction and how does it affect a person? In this article, we will discuss some facts related to relationship addiction to help people understand the condition better.

What is Relationship Addiction?
There are people who always want to be in a relationship. It is what gives a meaning to their lives. A relationship addiction, as indicative of the name, is a condition whereby a person has an irresistible urge to be in a relationship. No matter how unhealthy or detrimental the relationship is, a relationship addict can go to any extent to cling on to the relationship (even if it spells doom for their physical, mental and emotional health). However, the sad part is, the effort is only from one end, with the partner seldom reciprocating with the same passion and intensity. More than often, a relationship addict is unaware of the mess they are in and avoids people who try to point out the truth to them.

Signs you are a relationship addict-
A relationship addiction is a psychological disorder that affects a person in ways beyond imagination. Some of the signs that indicate a relationship addiction include:

  1. A person considers the other person (their partner) to be their life, their source of happiness and contentment. Not being in a relationship means the end of the world for them.
  2. You try every possible trick up your sleeve to be around the person 24x7. Not seeing or communicating with the other person for a long time can leave you hysteric.
  3. No matter how unhealthy (at times, even abusive) the relationship is, you find it difficult to end the relationship or part ways with the person.
  4. In spite of a breakup, you can't take the person out of your mind. In extreme cases, you end up stalking the person and his/her activities.
  5. You always forgive the person in spite of their mistakes (including infidelity). In fact, you believe that you can bring about a positive change in your partner.
  6. Immediately after a breakup, you get into another relationship to avoid being left alone and abandoned.
  7. You often get into a long-distance relationship or get involved with a person who is already committed or married. In other words, you try and avoid the intimacy and passion in a relationship.

How to deal with Addictive Relationship?
An addictive relationship can make life miserable for you. To come out of an addictive relationship, you need to analyze your situation.

  1. You have to understand that your behavior or the relationship is not healthy.
  2. Talk to your family and loved ones.
  3. Seek professional help. Go for counseling sessions.
  4. Practice yoga and meditation to relax and soothe your inner self.
  5. Don't be an escapist, face the situation.

It may be difficult, but with effort and the support of your loved ones, you will be able to overcome your addiction.

In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!

2655 people found this helpful

How to Help Your Kids Overcome Addiction?

Dr. Mehak Arora 90% (69 ratings)
MPhil Clinical Psychology, Masters in Psychology
Psychologist, Gurgaon
How to Help Your Kids Overcome Addiction?

Drug addiction is a major problem in today's world. The major part of these drug abuse victims are teenagers. There are several reasons may drive your teen kid to hard drugs which include peer pressure, neglect, curiosity or just for the sake of being cool. This could be a major concern for the parents whose children get addicted to drugs but an important thing to keep in mind is that the only person who can help your kid overcome addiction are the parents.

Here are a few measures that can help your kid overcome drug addiction:

  1.  In order to put your kids on the right path, the most important thing is to show them love. You should keep aside your anger, fear and grief and approach them. Tell them why you are scared or angry. Proper love and affection is required to bring your kids back to the normal track.
  2. Try to find their strengths and weakness. Your child should be complemented for any good thing he or she does. You should observe them properly and try to perceive their current nature and mental state.
  3. You should try to keep your calm and talk to them instead of scolding, shouting or threatening them. You must also listen to them carefully and try not to react in any way. Talk to them about your concerns and see whether they are cooperating with you.
  4. Getting your kids involved in some activity, which will let them mix with a different group of peers will be a positive remedy. You have to make them feel good about themselves. Try to find ways so that your kids will get into some positive, productive activity.
  5. Fixing an appointment with a psychiatrist who deals with drug abuse situations can also help you deal with the issue. You must explain to your kids that there is an obvious reason behind their addiction, and it must be solved for their own good.
  6. You should also connect with the counselors at schools and colleges. They have seen many cases like your child’s and know about the situation well. You can enroll your kids in a substance abuse program which is connected with his school.
  7. You must tell your kids that what they are doing is risky and illegal and as parents, you have the right to help them overcome this in order to maintain good health, and that you do not want them to go to prison.
  8. Find an expert therapist specializing in teen substance abuse and make your kids have weekly appointments with him. A good therapist knows the best ways to guide your kids to the right path.

Drug addiction in kids is a common syndrome these days. If your kid is into hard drugs, you need to do your best to save him and help him overcome the addiction. If you wish to discuss about any specific problem, you can consult a psychologist.

4997 people found this helpful
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