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Bipolar Disorder in Children Tips

Sibling Rivalry: What You Need To Know?

Mrs. Anam Kaushal 89% (82 ratings)
MPhil Clinical Psychology
Psychologist, Delhi
Sibling Rivalry: What You Need To Know?

Sibling rivalry

Well, what drew my interest to this topic was when I read on a social networking site, how few mothers are experiencing problems in raising siblings. Some siblings are quite lucky enough to become best friends. While the other few do experience some or the other problem with our sibling during the growing up process. Problems and tussles like this that we experience are technically termed as sibling rivalry.

Sibling rivalry is the jealousy, competition and fighting between brothers and sisters. It is a concern for almost all parents of two or more than two children. Sibling rivalry is a normal part of growing up in a family. It's important to be aware of how powerful sibling rivalry can become. If sibling rivalry becomes a persistent problem, it's worthwhile tackling it before it gets out of control.

Research shows that often, sibling rivalry starts even before the second child is born, and continues as the children grow and compete for everything from toys to attention. Some common reactions to a new baby includes -

  • Showing anger toward the baby (hitting, kicking, punching, biting) 
  • Asking for the baby to go back in mother's tummy or back to the hospital.
  • Demanding more attention when the parent is with the baby.
  • Some degree of emotional disturbance usually following the birth.

As parents, we say that we treat our children equally but, in reality, it is not possible to do so. If such kind of rivalry is not dealt in a proper manner, the fighting between brothers and sisters is filled with physical and psychological aggression which traumatizes them and can lead to depression, anxiety and anger.

Signs of sibling rivalry

  • Children under 9 years of age may show these signs:
  • Fighting (verbal or physical attack).
  • Demanding attention.
  • Frustration.
  • Regressive acts such as bed wetting, baby talk, temper tantrums etc.
  • Older children may show these signs:
  • Constant arguing.
  • Competing for friends, grades or in sports.
  • Taking out their frustration on objects, pets or other people.

It is not necessary to get perplexed with this situation. Believe it or not, sibling rivalry is a natural phenomenon. However, what is important to know what causes it. Let’s uncover few common causes of sibling rivalry.

  • Attention – this is far most the most important factor of conflict between siblings. Children are always yearning for parents love, affection and time. When there’s a new baby, it can be hard for the other child to accept losing his or her position as the center of attention. If your child is acting out and misbehaving, then he or she is doing so to get your attention as they’re feeling ignored.
  • Sharing – is one principle which we follow and have been following from ages. But giving up a toy or other favorite possession to a sibling can be especially hard on young children.
  • Comparison – no two siblings can be alike, even twins are not completely alike. Every child has his own set of personality, interest, aptitude and often as a parent knowingly or unknowingly we land up praising and appreciating one child and forget about the other. This leads to a state of comparison. Moreover, an age and gender difference also brings forth sibling fights.
  • Jealousy – comparison always results in a feeling of jealousy. Siblings start feeling jealous of each other. If mother is taking care of need of one child, the other child feels neglected and develops negative feeling for his/her brother or sister.
  • Proximity of age - if you have children who are close together in age, it could stimulate sibling rivalry. This is because you will have to give the children the same kind of attention. This makes it easier for them to compare the care you give to each, and find subtle differences.
  • Gender- a son may hate his sister because his father seems more gentle with her. On the other hand, a daughter may feel that her parents love her brother more as he has more freedom than her.

Any of the above mentioned causes can be found in one or the other sibling. However, there might be few who will be non-expressive kinds. They would be piling up with emotions deep down inside them but will never be upfront and expressive about it. In a situation like this try to unfold the non – verbal gestures of your child such as has your child staying aloof lately? is the child performing activity in solitary? is he/she is not coming up and sharing things with you as he/she was doing before?

Even though these things might sound as a process of growing up (as we commonly hear this from our own parents and grandparents), they might have some serious repercussion in the process of development. 

To begin with sibling rivalry affects how children perceive themselves. As seen the rivalry begins at the time of the second born, the older child feels sidelined because his new born sibling has a much higher level of parental attention and care. He starts to feel unloved and thinks his presence is no longer valued. The feelings can quickly develop into jealousy, which is not good for his/her, sense of self – identity and emotional growth.

Even though we consider rivalry as a part of growing up, and overlook it, it can develop violent behavior in siblings. For instance when one child hits the other with a ball, you would think they are playing, while in fact, they are fighting. If unattended, such conflicts can get out of hand and erupt into a war, with kids getting violent.

Your child’s ability to develop interpersonal relationships may get hampered. As the social skills of the child’s get questionable, nobody would like to interact with him/her and make friends. Without healthy social skills the child may start feeling isolated as his/her friends will start labeling him/her as a person who “bullies”.

If you are experiencing any of these with your children, then you would be curious to know the possible solutions for this condition. So here it goes, know I will not provide you with false assurance that sibling rivalry will never occur after following these solutions, as I mentioned before that it is a normal process of growing up. However, these solutions will help you tackle the situation and bring out the best out of your child.

At the first place, give sufficient time between the birthsof each child so as to avoid having more than one child needing the same kind of care and attention at one time. When the family is expecting a new baby, the parents should begin early to talk and to convince their older children as to how important the children’s help is going to be with the caring of their new baby brother or sister. The parents should also discuss the child’s considerable responsibilities as older brothers or sisters.

If you have a new born coming home involve the older sibling with the new born. You can involve the older child in getting ready to welcome the new born. Decorate the house; choose decoration articles with the help of the older child. Involve the older one with the needs of the younger one for example – let the older one pick clothes for the new born, take his/her help with bathing, dressing and feeding the new one to name a few as this would develop a sense of responsibility, development of positive feelings and care for the new one. This will also make the older child feel wanted and be a part of the young one’s need and yet again you are spending time as a family. Do not forget to appreciate the older sibling with the amount of efforts he/she is displaying as this acts like reinforcement and boost the child.

Now, conflicts are bound to occur, you cannot avoid it. Nevertheless, you can help your child handle conflicts in a positive manner. You can teach your child to manage the disagreement in a constructive manner. Emphasize and develop listening skills in your child – by listening to their sibling’s point of view or not engaging in name-calling -- will be in a much better frame of mind to settle disputes and move past fighting.

Make them understand the meaning of “family”. They need to understand that family is just like a team, a team which includes team members like mom, dad, brother and sister. And just like how cricketers are a team and they play for the team and not as an individual and cooperate with each other, similarly family members need to work together to have a loving and peaceful environment. Family respects each other’s feeling, desires and expectations. Any fight in the house affects the team or the family.

Sometimes parents unintentionally or intentionally leaves it on children. They believe that it is best to leave it on kids. But now it’s time to come forward and become a mediator. Hold both the kids responsible and do not favor any child, even when sometimes one is right and other is wrong. Sit down with the kids and each of you talk as team; let each child narrate his/her part of the story and emphasize where who went wrong. Do not impose them with your solutions – wait for them to come up with their own solutions. When the solutions will come from both the end, they would defiantly follow it.

2 people found this helpful

Strict Parenting - Can It Be Harmful For Your Kids?

Dr. Priti Srivastava 91% (42 ratings)
PGDCA, BA-Psychology, MA-Psychology, Phd Understanding Mental Retardation
Psychologist, Delhi
Strict Parenting - Can It Be Harmful For Your Kids?

You might think, as a parent, that if you behave strictly then your child will become well-behaved. But research and studies have shown that the opposite happens. Strict parenting leads to children who behave worse than others and they suffer from low self-esteem.

Some other reasons why being strict is harmful:

  1. Never learning self-regulation: Responsibility and self-discipline have to be learned by the children themselves. When you put harsh limits on them, they never learn self-regulation. If they think the limits don’t sound too harsh, they will learn to accept them. But the limits placed on them should never be controlling. If this happens, children see themselves as being controlled and no one enjoys being controlled.
  2. Instilling fearIf you are being authoritarian (parenting in which there are high demands and low sympathy) instead of empathetic, then your children will become scared of you. You are instilling the power of fear in them. This triggers a vicious chain of events. When you yell, they will yell as well.
  3. Anger and depressionAuthoritarian parenting often leads to children believing a part of them is unacceptable. They feel that their parents would not understand. It makes them susceptible to anger management issues and depression.
  4. Blindly obeying those in power: Children raised up in strict households start thinking power is always right. They learn to obey blindly. This makes them vulnerable to peer pressure. They also never learn to take responsibility for their actions.
  5. Rebelling: Children tend to be angrier and become rebellious when they have strict parents. The need to break free and not conform to the non-empathetic limits that forces them to act out. They might even nurture thoughts about leaving home and running away.
  6. Lying: Strict parenting creates excellent liars. Children learn to lie when they are in trouble. They think lies will placate their parents and they can get away with anything.
  7. Damage to parent-child relationship: If you are strict and you don’t change your authoritarian ways, then it damages your relationship with your children. Natural empathy is lacking in strict parents. You don’t understand your child, and your child doesn’t feel like sharing their lives with you. It creates a divide between the parent and child. Children never quite get over this as they grow older.

In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!

2353 people found this helpful

Mental Disorders

Dr. D. S. Poonia 93% (142 ratings)
MD - Psychiatry
Psychiatrist, Jaipur

 More than 17 crores (14%) of Indian population needs mental health intervention. Still, one out of ten people utilizes the professional help for mental health problems. There is a huge gap between the services needed urgently and services available to reduce burden. 

Other facts about mental health disorders:       

  • 1 out of 4 is suffering from mental health issues       
  • 1 out of 5 is suffering from Depression       
  • Nearly 20% of the world's children and adolescents have mental disorders or problems      
  • Mental and substance use disorders are the leading cause of disability worldwide       
  • Around 8,00,000 people commit suicide every year, and it's a second leading cause of death in 15-29 age group.       
  • Mental health disorder can happen to anyone and are not a sign of weakness or faul

Lack of awareness, Stigma, and Discrimination are the biggest hurdle against patients and families for seeking mental health care.

19 people found this helpful

Mental Health

Dr. D. S. Poonia 93% (142 ratings)
MD - Psychiatry
Psychiatrist, Jaipur
Mental Health

"Yes I'm Mental"

 More than 17 crores (14%) of Indian population needs mental health intervention. Still, one out of ten people utilizes the professional help for mental health problems. There is a huge gap between the services needed urgently and services available to reduce burden. 

Other facts about mental health disorders·        

  • 1 out of 4 is suffering from mental health issues       
  • 1 out of 5 is suffering from Depression       
  • Near around 20% of the world's children and adolescents have mental disorders or problems      
  • Mental and substance use disorders are the leading cause of disability worldwide       
  •  Around 8,00,000 people commit suicide every year, and it's a second leading cause of death in 15-29 age group       
  • Mental health disorder can happen to anyone and are not a sign of weakness or fault

Single Parent - Problems Your Child Might Face!

Dr. Nisha Khanna 87% (51 ratings)
Ph. D - Psychology
Psychologist, Delhi
Single Parent - Problems Your Child Might Face!

The mother and the father, both clearly play defined roles in the development of a child’s personality. While the mother teaches the child things like kindness and love, the father reinforces messages like hard work and dedication. Due to various reasons, there are a number of children who end up growing up with single parents. Both the child and the parent have to deal with a lot of hardships.

The patterns observed also differ based on whether the single parent is the mother or the father. There are various negative effects to this, and few of them have been listed below.

  1. Social disconnect: Most children growing up with a single parent do not feel normal. There is a constant feeling of confused identity. In some cases, the children may not be able to cope with these hardships leading to depression and decreased self-confidence. In the long run, the child may be less compassionate and supportive and more aggressive and confused. There could be a sense of resentment towards the parents for forcing him to live with a single parent. The kid may also despise other children who grow up with both parents. They may also have very less friends and social connect than kids with both parents
  2. Odd combination: If a single mother is raising a son, her contribution to his growth is very limited from a psychological point of view. They would always look for a father figure whom they can reach out to. Same is the case with a girl growing up with a single father. She misses the mother with whom alone she would be able to share some things. The overall personality in both these cases is significantly altered from boys and girls who grow up with both parents.
  3. Performance levels: The stress of living with single parents puts pressure on the child constantly, and there could be performance dip in academics, sports, and co-curricular activities. These children also tend to become uncooperative; therefore getting them to follow the school curriculum becomes difficult. The chances of them dropping out of education and getting expelled from school are quite high.
  4. Social menaces: The incidence of smoking, alcohol abuse, and substance abuse is quite high and also happens much earlier in these kids. Because of the constant stress they are in, these become outlets for them to be themselves.
  5. Sexual abuse: With single parent children, the chances of sexual abuse (by them and of them) are also quite high.

These are some of the psychological problems that children growing up with single parent face. Although this may not be the case with all the children as every child has a different thinking and reaction. However unpleasant it may be, this continuous battle on raising a child alone and addressing these issues has to be fought every single day. If you wish to discuss about any specific problem, you can consult a Psychologist.

4222 people found this helpful

Depression in Children - Symptoms, Causes And Treatment

Dr. Nishantadeb Ghatak 88% (48 ratings)
MBBS,MD(PGI,Chandigarh)
Pediatrician, Kolkata
Depression in Children - Symptoms, Causes And Treatment

Depression in children is not a very uncommon phenomenon. But if the feeling of sadness persists over a period of time with little or no change to their behavior, then it can be seen as a symptom of depression. Children who are suffering from depression need immediate and utmost care as negligence may cause severe long term effects on the child. Read on to find more about them.

Symptoms:
Symptoms that indicate childhood depression vary. Some of the different symptoms which indicate depression are:

  1. Social withdrawal
  2. Irritability
  3. Feeling of worthlessness
  4. Difficulty in concentrating
  5. Reduced ability to function during events
  6. Continuous feelings of sadness
  7. Physical complaints

Causes:

  1. Depression in children can be caused due to the combination of a multitude of reasons.
  2. Children from a family history of depression are more likely to be suffering from depression. â€‹Similarly, if the parents suffer from depression then it is more than likely that the child will also suffer from depression.
  3. Children from conflicted families or children and teens who are prone to substance or alcohol abuse can suffer from depression.
  4. Reasons such as physical health, environment, genetic vulnerability or biochemical disturbance can lead to depression.

Treatment:
The treatment process of depression in children is similar to that of adults and can be treated with psychotherapy and medication. If your child is depressed consult a general physician who after his or her diagnosis may refer you to a psychiatrist. The medical specialist will recommend psychotherapy.

In some instances, a child suffering from depression maybe be suicidal. Parents are advised to be vigilant and observe certain behavioral changes that the child may have adapted to or suddenly switched to.
Some of the signs are mentioned below:

  1. Changes in eating, sleeping or activities
  2. Isolating oneself even from family
  3. Talking of suicide, feeling helpless or hopeless
  4. Increased risk taking behavior
  5. Substance abuse
  6. Giving away possessions

Sessions at first and then opt for antidepressant medication if no significant progress is seen. The best results often result from a combination of prescribed medication along with multiple sessions of psychotherapy.

3714 people found this helpful

Attachment Disorder - 8 Risks Associated With It

Dr. Ketan Parmar 88% (330 ratings)
M.D Psychiatry , DPM, MBBS
Psychiatrist, Mumbai
Attachment Disorder - 8 Risks Associated With It

While most children share a strong bond with their parents, especially the mother, some infants are unable to establish lasting relationships with their parents or caregivers. This is known as attachment disorder. It is a rare yet serious condition as it affects the child’s relationships at a later stage and also triggers delinquent behavior. Children, who have been abandoned, orphaned or are victims of abuse are the most vulnerable to this condition.

What causes attachment disorder?
The exact cause for attachment disorder is not yet understood. However, researchers have put together a number of viable hypotheses for this. One such hypothesis suggests that when needs of a child are ignored or when he begins to feel unwanted, the child begins to expect hostility, negativity and rejection. This is a learnt response and the child begins to feel that his needs are unwanted. With time, these responses make the child untrusting and he withdraws into himself to avoid social contact. This affects the development in the brain and causes attachment problems that affect the child’s personality and future relationships.

Risks associated with it
Some children are at a higher risk of attachment disorder than others. This includes

  1. Children living in orphanages or other such institutes
  2. Children whose caregivers are changed frequently
  3. Children who have had prolonged hospitalization
  4. Neglected children
  5. Children who have suffered from physical, sexual or verbal abuse
  6. Children living in extreme poverty
  7. Children born to parents with mental conditions or anger management problems
  8. Children born to a mother suffering from post partum depression

Symptoms
There are two types of attachment disorders; inhibited and disinhibited.

  1. Inhibited attachment disorder: Children suffering from inhibited attachment disorder are likely to be:
    • Detached
    • Withdrawn
    • Unresponsive to comforting ie. they shun all types of relationships and generally do not get along with their peers or caregivers.
  2. Disinhibited attachment disorder: On the other hand, children suffering from disinhibited attachment are likely to:
    • Seek attention
    • Display inappropriate behavior
    • Frequently break social boundaries
    • Be inappropriately familial and attached to selective figures.

Additionally, children suffering from either type of attachment disorder are manipulative, destructive, moody and lack compassion and remorse.
Effects of attachment disorder
If not managed properly in its early stages, this disorder can continue into adulthood. This leads to:

  1. Relationship problems with peers, friends and family members
  2. Low self esteem
  3. Depression
  4. Anger management
  5. Academic problems
  6. Unemployment
  7. They are also at a high risk for drug abuse and alcohol addiction 

    If you wish to discuss about any specific problem, you can consult a psychologist.

2584 people found this helpful

Role Of Homeopathy In Treating Anxiety Disorder

Dr. Chhavi Bansal 90% (1082 ratings)
Diploma in Diet and Nutrition, M.Sc - Psychology, BHMS
Homeopath, Delhi
Role Of Homeopathy In Treating Anxiety Disorder

All of us undoubtedly experience the hasty pace of life. There are invariable pressures at work and home which load us up with fear and worries, but when this anxiety becomes a disruptive force in our life and begins to dominate our behavior, and starts interfering with work, school, family life it calls for treatment. Anxiety is an emotional turmoil that may incorporate many different feelings and symptoms.

Adults are not the only ones who get stressed out, children are also vulnerable to stress. Some children experience anxiety and may struggle to amend to new situations such as school and friendships, may feel unusually insecure or have intense fear of the dark, insects, animals or other creatures.

Causes of Anxiety Neurosis:

The reason why it occur is very difficult. It is illunderstood also. Socio-economic reason is also precipitating factor - like loss of job, continues target or goals in jobs which are increasing everyday pressure.

  1. Heredity.

  2. Imbalance of certain chemicals in the brain.

  3. Emotional trauma.

  4. Lifestyle choices.

  5. Alcohol, caffeine and certain drugs.

Symptoms of Anxiety Disorder (neurosis):

  1. Unnecessary, unrealistic and uncontrollable worry about everyday things.

  2. Shortness of breath.

  3. Increased heartbeat.

  4. Trembling and dizziness.

  5. Headaches.

  6. Fatigue.

  7. Muscle stiffness.

  8. Restlessness.

  9. Sleep disturbances.

  10. Mood changes.

  11. Diarrhea.

  12. Feeling of hopelessness and Pessimism.

  13. Sexual impotence.

Homoeopathic Treatment:

Homeopathy is one of the most popular holistic systems of medicine. The selection of remedy is based upon the theory of individualization and symptoms similarity by using holistic approach. This is the only way through which a state of complete health can be regained by removing all the sign and symptoms from which the patient is suffering. The aim of homeopathy is not only to treat anxiety but to address its underlying cause and individual susceptibility. As far as therapeutic medication is concerned, several well-proved homeopathy medicines are available for treatment of anxiety disorders that can be selected on the basis of cause, condition, sensation and modalities of the complaints. For individualized remedy selection and treatment, the patient should consult a qualified homeopathic doctor in person.

If you do not want to opt for allopathic medicines or go into immediate counselling to relieve yourself of anxiety disorders, then the best option for you at hand would be to try and follow homoeopathy. Homeopathy is often seen as an alternate form of medicine and does not have any side effects as such. Thus, it is often preferred by many people.

Anxiety should not be left to accumulate in the body. Thus, it is necessary to treat it as soon as possible with whichever means that would suit your body. Homeopathy is just one form of treatment. It is advised if the results are not as you desire, then you should opt for a medical practitioner who might be able to help you further.

7808 people found this helpful

Stomach Ache in Kids - 7 Causes Behind It!

Dr. Abhilash Gaur 89% (96 ratings)
Diploma in Child Health (DCH), MBBS
Pediatrician, Noida
Stomach Ache in Kids - 7 Causes Behind It!

Stomach aches or abdominal pains are one of the most frequently reported health complaints faced by children. Children below the age of twelve are known to suffer from recurrent stomach pain. While pains such as these lead to momentary discomfiture, they also lay the path for graver worries if neglected for too long. Your child may feel sick and bunk school for two days; rest and home care can restore his or her health, but that in no way, is the best suited way of dealing with the situation. If tummy aches resurface over a certain period of time, parents should be cautious enough to look for the root cause and should try to eliminate it accordingly.

Widely noticed causes of stomach aches in children:

  1. Unhygienic food can affect the child’s digestive system.
  2. Intolerance to a certain food item should not be overlooked.
  3. Perpetual anxiety can make the tummy twist and turn.
  4. Urinary Tract Infections can also lead to acute abdominal pain.
  5. Serious factors such as gallstones or appendicitis could also be present. Immediate expert consultation is advised in such a case.
  6. Caffeine and packaged soft drinks can be harmful.
  7. Butter, ghee and other greasy products can trigger tummy aches.

Ways to treat tummy aches in children:

  1. Keep children away from gas producing food items: Food that is hard to digest should be avoided. Lentil soup or dal should only be consumed in limited amounts to prevent the formation of gas. Don’t let your child have too many nuts regularly.
  2. Keep them hydrated: Fluid intake should be monitored. A child should drink at least six to seven glasses of water per day. Fruit juices or soups can also be given to them alongside main meals. This helps digestion.
  3. Do not stack up food in one go: Eating a lot in one meal is a bad way of satisfying hunger. Have smaller meals in more numbers. Six to eight meals will keep your child full and will also eliminate chances of acid reflux which happens either due to an empty stomach or too much piling up of greasy food.
  4. Timely check - up with the doctor: If tummy aches refuse to go away, take your child to a doctor for a thorough check- up. Administer medicines as prescribed by the physician.
2735 people found this helpful

Weight Loss: Homeopathic Medicines for it!

Dr. B.D. Patel 87% (157 ratings)
BHMS, MD-Homeopath
Homeopath, Bangalore
Weight Loss: Homeopathic Medicines for it!

Obesity or excessive weight is a common problem for both men and women irrespective of their age. Obesity must not be ignored as it can lead to further complicated health problems like heart diseases and asthma. Different causes are responsible for excessive weight gain, such as hypothyroidism, depression or polycystic ovarian disease among many others.

Homeopathy offers many effective medicines for weight loss; they are as follows:

  1. Antimonium crudum: This medicine is advised to children or young people suffering from excessive and inappropriate weight. If symptoms like thick white coat on the tongue, discoloration of nails, craving for salt, irritability are noticed in a child or young person, then the doctor may recommend this medicine.
  2. Calcarea carbonica: This medicine is recommended if fat gets accumulated in the abdominal region. It helps to lose fat from the abdomen region. It is also given to a person showing the symptom of excessive perspiration.
  3. Lycopodium: It is administered to people showing symptoms like depression or excessive craving for sweets. It helps to lose weight from the thigh or buttock region.
  4. Graphites: This may be advised if you show symptoms like fatigue, weakness or depression. It is mostly suggested to women.
  5. Nux vomica: This may be recommended if you have gained weight due to inactiveness. If symptoms like constipation or sensitivity to cold air are noticed, then this may be advised.
  6. Ignatia: Ignatia is generally advised if you gain weight due to depression.
  7. Natrum Mur: This medicine may be advised to lose weight from the thigh and buttock region. It is given to people showing symptoms like depression, sensitivity towards heat or sun.
  8. Phytolacca: This is one of the most common medicines suggested by doctors for weight loss. If you show symptoms like swollen glands, pain in the ear or feel dryness in your throat, then this may be advised to you.

It is highly recommended for you to consult a homeopathic doctor before taking any medicine in order to find out the root cause of your weight gain.

4790 people found this helpful
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