I am very shy to talk with persons, who are known by me. I can talk with other persons freely, but not with my persons. Even I am not able to walk and feeling shy in front of any of my friends group. Suggest me. Please.

Dr. Saul PereiraPsychologist46yrs exp

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You may be an introvert. This is a problem of fearing people for what they think about you, especially the ones who know you best. Yes, people will often judge you but that is not the final word. When we try to read other people?s mind we will always think that they know the worst things about you, that your flaws are easily visible, and then you feel self-conscious and guilty. This is all far from the truth. People do not know you, even if they are married to you for many years! In fact, you do not know yourself for many years and may go to your grave with a minimum understanding of yourself. So, face people with confidence, knowing that they are the least knowledgeable about you. Sometimes, your family may not have socialized much and that can also give you a disadvantage about mixing and meeting people. This can be unlearned and you can make a new beginning and easily become a social butterfly. Many people have hesitations about social situations and are in the same boat: you have a lot of company. The bottom line is that you have afraid: deal with your fear and people will seem different, and not so threatening. This ability is a natural ability in all of us. If it was not stimulated early in your life, now is not too late. We are all gregarious by nature, and need each other, to the extent that we are all interdependent. I recommend that you attend a personality development course, attend the Toastmasters Club, and meet people by attending conferences, seminars, workshops, meetings, and social clubs. In time, this anxiety will dissipate and disappear, completely. 

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