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How to manage premature ejaculation with non-medical methods
In my last article, I talked about statistics of premature ejaculation (P.E), its types, diagnosis and reasons. Now I will discuss about the non-medical methods of managing / treating P.E. Due to PE both partners often end up experiencing highly unsatisfactory sex. In fact, it can increase anxiety, reduce self-confidence and escalate relationship issues. Remember, there is no magical drug or medicine which can solve your problem overnight especially if you have chronic PE.
So, before seeking any medical treatment for PE, it is appropriate to consider the varied options available for solving this issue. These include counselling with a sexual therapist, medical treatment including both modern & alternative medicine, and non-medical methods like exercises/techniques of controlling early ejaculation as discussed below:
- Counselling by an expert sexual therapist or sexologist: It is commonly understood that sex is in the mind. Mind controls your sexual behaviour. However, repeated premature ejaculation episodes can lead to lot of stress and disappointment. Anxiety due to inability to satisfy your partner itself is a big issue and can lead to reoccurrence of PE. So, the stress /anxiety that is linked to your problem needs foremost attention. Many a times, if your family physician is not able to help you overcome the stress that you are facing with your problem of premature ejaculation, then you must seek advice from an expert. Reassurance, from a sexual therapist/counsellor, that PE is not a disease and can be easily treated is very soothing and relaxing for the men who are facing this problem. So, you may please share your detailed history and sexual habits with the expert that will help him to guide you well.
- Behavioural changes: Some basic behavioural changes may also help you to deal with the problem of early ejaculation. For example, some men attempt to treat themselves for premature ejaculation by distracting themselves by thinking nonsexual thoughts (such as naming cricket players and records!) to avoid getting excited too fast and reaching climax too soon while making love to their partners. This helps them to focus their attention away from the sexual stimulation. Another technique suggested to men is that they should relieve themselves of the sexual tension by ejaculating with self-masturbation 1-2 hours before attempting sexual intercourse with their partner. Condom decreases sensation. So, using condoms is also useful in preventing ejaculation for some time. For some, “women-on-top” position also helps in delaying orgasm in men.
- Exercises & techniques: There are several Exercise and techniques that one can try sitting in his home. Let’s have a look at some of them.
- The "stop and start" method: In this technique, the person sexually stimulates himself till the point he feels like he is about to reach orgasm. Then he needs to stop the stimulation for about 20-30 seconds and then start the stimulation again, repeating this pattern until the man finally wants to ejaculate. This can be continued for 10-15 minutes. At the end of, say 10th or 15th minute, one can continue stimulation until he reaches orgasm and ejaculates.
- The "squeeze" method: This technique requires the man to sexually stimulate himself or be stimulated by his partner until the point he is about to ejaculate. At that point, the man or his partner gently squeezes the end of the penis (where the glans penis meets the shaft) for at least 15 seconds. Stop sexual stimulation for about 60 seconds, and then start it again. The person or couple may repeat this pattern for at least 10-15 minutes. At the end of, say 10th or 15th minute, both can continue stimulation until the man finally reaches orgasm and ejaculates.
- Deep breathing method: Deep breathing can greatly help in controlling the arousal and tension that cause early ejaculation. Men must avoid taking shallow breaths as it can trigger premature ejaculation. Instead, what one should do is spend 5 seconds inhaling a long deep breath; then hold it for three seconds and then exhale for the next 5 seconds. If you can do this for 5 minutes in the bedroom, without pause, then you can control premature ejaculation.
That is all for now on this topic. In my next sequential and final article on this subject, I shall discuss what are the medical methods and treatments available to manage premature ejaculation.