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Dr. Shilpa Desai

Psychologist, Mumbai

3000 at clinic
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Dr. Shilpa Desai Psychologist, Mumbai
3000 at clinic
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My favorite part of being a doctor is the opportunity to directly improve the health and wellbeing of my patients and to develop professional and personal relationships with them....more
My favorite part of being a doctor is the opportunity to directly improve the health and wellbeing of my patients and to develop professional and personal relationships with them.
More about Dr. Shilpa Desai
Dr. Shilpa Desai is an experienced Psychologist in Malad West, Mumbai. You can consult Dr. Shilpa Desai at Complete Health Care Clinic in Malad West, Mumbai. Save your time and book an appointment online with Dr. Shilpa Desai on Lybrate.com.

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#B1/2, Giriraj, Evershine nagar,opp link road, Malad west . Landmark: Behind Movietime Theater, MumbaiMumbai Get Directions
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I am 21 years old and I having problem in remembering my study material what can I do ?

(MRCPSYCH-UK), MD - Psychiatry, MBBS
Psychiatrist, Hyderabad
Forgetfulness and decreased concentration can be a symptom of depression or anxiety. Consult a psychiatrist for effective treatment. Eat well, sleep on time, maintain a regular day structure, meditation, breathing exercises, focus on the task, rehearse all these will improve your memory and concentration.
7 people found this helpful
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I am suffering from chest pain I think oall is due to my habit of smoking how I can get rid of this habit.

Reparenting Technique, BA, BEd
Psychologist, Bangalore
I am suffering from chest pain I think oall  is due to my habit of smoking how I can get rid of this habit.
You have to quit cold turkey because the body and mind will torture you endlessly while attempting a reduction in smoking. The tobacco tar in cigarette smoke lines your lung with huge patches that make that portion dysfunctional. Your oxygen carrying capacity is jeopardized, and breathing is impinged on. But don’t be discouraged because it is not too late even now to reverse all the ill-effects of smoking. I don’t know what other organs could be damaged but do go for a thorough medical check-up to assess the effects of your abuse. Regarding improving your lungs, do a lot of aerobic exercise breathing through your nostrils only. Then there are a lot of deep breathing exercises in Yoga which you can learn too. Deep breathing cleanses your system and lungs and restores it to good health. Deep breathing uses the 80% of the lungs which are not normally used in normal breathing and even when exerting yourself. The greatest effect is in the lungs because this substance is processed through the respiratory system directly through the lung surface. When quitting, you must take one day at a time; though you must give up all smoking at once, and promptly. If you look too far ahead you will get discouraged and will give up. If you sit and count the number of days you have given up, that will also focus too much on achievement. You must focus on the here and now, on that day to be precise. After all quitting is not that easy due to many factors. So even if you fail one day, you must try and try again. Very few people succeed in their first attempt. Your persistence will eventually pay off. The urge to discontinue is hampered by many factors but the worst of them is the conditioning. In fact, these conditions can exist all through the day, unlike other addictions. But your desire to want to stop is the most important factor. It is important to find out about the ill-effects of smoking to have a reason that alarms you about continuing the habit. The information is really scary but true and you must remind yourself about this every day. The nicotine in tobacco smoke stimulates the heartbeat to raise the blood pressure in no time at all. So you must avoid it like the plague: it is just very bad medicine for you. In fact, it is highly toxic too. You will need to stop smoking or consuming any tobacco related items with immediate effect. You should start vigorous exercises, gradually increasing it over a period of time. Do deep breathing exercises every time you feel like smoking (try Yoga), and replace the oral urge with some healthy food substitute to satiate the need. You may also take hard candy or chew gum. If the urge is too strong, then use nicotine gums and nicotine patches, for a little while until the smoking drive reduces, substantially. You may also join Smokers Anonymous in your city where the support is really extraordinary for like-minded people who are also in the same situation. Keep yourself occupied or engaged with interesting activities during the times when it is most tempting. Keep the company of non-smokers for some time i.e. At least for the first 21 days. Above all announce it to everyone that you have quit smoking. Here’s a piece of very good advice: even if you accidentally/willfully take a cigarette, it is not the end of the world – you can start the cessation all over again. You must persevere with the best support until you defeat this addiction. Counseling is very useful in the initial stages and when temptations are at their highest. You could also join twitter2quit program and enjoy its success to give up smoking.
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I am willing to quite alcohol I drink once a week What can be side effects of withdrawing What can stop or kill the urge.

Reparenting Technique, BA, BEd
Psychologist, Bangalore
You are making a big issue where there is none. There will be no side-effects from quitting with this low-level consumption and the urge will also diminsih easily.
1 person found this helpful
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Please advise me to increase the reading capacity of my son having 14 yrs of old.

BASM, MD, MS (Counseling & Psychotherapy), MSc - Psychology, Certificate in Clinical psychology of children and Young People, Certificate in Psychological First Aid, Certificate in Positive Psychology
Psychologist, Palakkad
Dear, you must be able to understand concentration, attention span, recollection and distraction. If you are able to watch a movie for two hours continuously, if you are able to play a game for an hour, then you do not have any concentration problems. You can't be attentive towards your studies because you are not interested in it. You are able to watch movie and play game because you are interested in it. Human cannot be attentive towards anything for more than 10 minutes. Then you should study in such a way that your attention is continued and make the subjects are interesting to you. Effective learning techniques should help you. Recollection depends on anxiety, stress and other physical and circumstantial factors. Distractions while studying are plentiful. You should be able to overcome distractions or avoid distractions. Please understand the above. Change your study style and attitude accordingly. Take care.
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I am a student and facing the social anxiety problem. Specially when I talk to girls I suffered from panic attacks. Along with this I am facing stage phobia. Worried about myself. What should I do to get out of this situation?

Reparenting Technique, BA, BEd
Psychologist, Bangalore
I am a student and facing the social anxiety problem. Specially when I talk to girls I suffered from panic attacks. A...
The important sign in panic attack is the feeling that you cannot handle fear and you are using an extreme reaction to the fear. You cannot control panic attack but you can do two things: you can change your perception of the fearful stimulus and you can change your response to the fear. The first one is the best and will preempt the need for the second. If you are already far gone into the reaction mode, then you need both responses to counter the attack. The way we see things in life (like half empty or half full glass) is very dependent on our attitude. Attitude may have developed over many years but fortunately can change in a matter of sustained choices made and acted up on now. Accordingly you choose to see things as either threatening or as an opportunity. The opportunist will be positive and work with the situation to make good out of it. The individual who sees it as threatening, will, out of fear, try to avoid/run away from the situation or react in a panic. Yes, self-belief does impact it too, but you can see that prior to that, perception will tarnish the belief system too. Here, you can see that all the resolution lies in just changing your perception/attitude, even if it is against odds. Changing your response, despite the perception, is building up of your reserves and resources to handle any contingency that life throws up at you. And life throws up situations quite regularly and heavily. For this you need to develop a fit mind and body: The former, by meditation and mind exercises; and the later, by exercises and proper diet. Included in the development of the mind is the handling of emotions, in your case fear. These changes will give you a handle on life and your perceptions and responses. Stage fear and this anxiety are both related to ear too. This is the number one fear of all people. Even the most successful speakers admit to this problem. In fact the first 90 seconds are most frightening. The heart beat races to doubles the normal: 144 times a minute. So you are advised to prepare a good opening sentence to launch you off to a good start. The fear is generally centered around rejection: am I good enough? Will people like me? Will people know more than me? Etc. A host of self-conscious comparisons that only make you feel inferior. When the whole world is in the same boat, take heart and learn some basic techniques to overcome this stage fright. Join a Toastmasters club in your town and develop your public speaking skills and experience. Also remember some little rules: look for some pleasant face in the audience, look over the audience, prepare yourself well, talk simply, understand that you can only talk on what you know not on some grand made-up design of yours, there are always others who are better than you, pray before you speak, and so on. Focus on the three areas of public speaking according to their importance: Presentation and appearance (20%), audience (30%), and content (50%). There are a lot more points but space constraints do not permit me to be more elaborate.
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I just lost my mother n getting panic attacks on daily basis after that. Everyone cried by seeing her dead body n after her death as well but I didn't even dropped a single year n now everything is striking on my mind n due to daily panic attacks my office work is getting affected. I'm not able to focus on Office work after that n usually that happens in evening timings. please tell me how can I get rid of it.

MBBS, MD - Psychiatry
Psychiatrist, Mumbai
I just lost my mother n getting panic attacks on daily basis after that. Everyone cried by seeing her dead body n aft...
It is natural to feel low and miss the person you have lost. However if it is interfering with your sleep, studies or general well being, or if you feel suicidal, you need to consult a psychiatrist. It is common to feel low, cry, feel like you are alone, or lose your self confidence. Usually time is the best healer. However if things are too difficult to handle you should talk to a psychiatrist or counselor. Confide in someone close to you, who will support you in this difficult time. Don't cut off from friends or family, even if you feel like you want to be alone.
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I'm a 35 yr old male fighting depression for over 10 yrs. What can I do to make myself feel better?

BASM, MD, MS (Counseling & Psychotherapy), MSc - Psychology, Certificate in Clinical psychology of children and Young People, Certificate in Psychological First Aid, Certificate in Positive Psychology
Psychologist, Palakkad
I'm a 35 yr old male fighting depression for over 10 yrs. What can I do to make myself feel better?
Dear , depression and related symptoms are body's defense mechanism against stress and fear and therefore you cannot fully eliminate it. When the symptoms become more frequent and prominent, it is called depressive disorder. It is a disorder and not a disease. Understanding depression helps you manage it properly. Education, awareness, cbt, ret etc are the therapeutical areas with which depressive disorder is managed effectively. Please post a detailed private question to me and I am sure I will be able to help and cure your problem. Take care.
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I am so nervous all time and feeling anxiety I can't be relaxed all time. I felt so tensed all time. What can I do?

MD Psychiatry, MBBS
Psychiatrist, Chandigarh
I am so nervous all time and feeling anxiety I can't be relaxed all time. I felt so tensed all time. What can I do?
Dear Mr. lybrate-user, Feeling nervous, anxiety, remaining tensed are all symptoms of underlying psychological disorder. However, in order to reach a definitive diagnosis, more details would be needed. It would be advisable to consult a psychiatrist for a detailed evaluation. Treatment in form of medications or psychotherapy will help you recover from your symptoms. Start exercising daily. It will also help you relax. Best wishes.
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Sir I have not concentrate on my study but when me learn anything then after some time I forgot.

C.S.C, D.C.H, M.B.B.S
General Physician,
I can give you study tip and concentration tips. 10 Study Tips to Improve Your Learning Study Tip 1: Underlining Underlining is one of the simplest and best known study tips. It’s easy to highlight the most significant parts of what you’re reading. One key sentence per paragraph and a few important phrases here and there. You can only retain a certain amount so it’s best to retain the most important information. Study Tip 2: Make your own note and taking notes is one of the most widespread study skills out there. Essentially the aim of note-taking is to summarise lectures or articles in your own words so you can easily remember the ideas. Study Tip 3: Mind mapping A good Mind map can save you many hours of study and further consolidate your knowledge for your exams. Mind Maps are an extremely versatile tools. They can be used for brainstorming, outlining essays or study topics and for general exam preparation, ExamTime offers the ability to create Mind Maps quickly and easily which makes them the ideal tool when it comes to exams. Study Tip 4: Flash cards:- Using these are a particularly effective method of learning when trying to assimilate different facts, dates, formulas or vocabulary. Subjects such as History, Physics, Maths, Chemistry, Geography or any language are made much easier if you incorporate Flashcards in to your study. Study Tip 5: Case Studies Sometimes it can be difficult to grasp the implications of some theories. This is where studying case studies can be a big help. Case studies can help you visualise a theory and place it in a more familiar and realistic context. This is especially useful in business or law subjects. Study Tip 6: Quizzes are an excellent way to review study notes in the weeks and days before an exam. Quizzes can show where your strengths and weaknesses are, so it allows you to focus your efforts more precisely. Moreover, if you share your Study Quiz with your classmates and test each other as much as possible you can discover even more details and areas you may have overlooked. So before any exam, make sure you create and share a bunch of different Quizzes with your Friends. Study Tip 7: Brainstorming This is another study technique that is ideal for studying with friends and/or classmates. Brainstorming is a great way to expand every possible idea out of any topic. Just get a bunch of friends together and shoot the breeze, there are no wrong answers when brainstorming – just talk and capture the ideas, you can review afterward. Study Tip 8: Mnemonic Rules Mnemonics are especially useful when memorising lists and sets. Mnemonics rules basically work by associating certain concepts with other concepts that are more familiar to us. There are many different ways to make mnemonics and these can be individual to the person. Study Tip 9: ORGANISE your study One of the most effective study skills is also one of the most often overlooked; this is organising your study. Creating a TIME TABLE gives you goals and a time in which to achieve them. Having a study timetable as you study is greatly motivational Study Tip 10: Drawing Many people find it easier to recall images rather than text that is why they are better able to memorise concepts if they associate them with pictures or drawings. If you find answer helpful please click on “helpful” tab for knowing my efforts are useful CONCENTRATION TIPS Here’s some tips to get into a state of deep concentration where work / or studies flow easily so that you can do well in examinations/ and or do your work well. 1) Cut Off the Noise Getting into a state of concentration can take at least fifteen minutes. If you are getting distracted every five, you can’t possibly focus entirely on your work. Request that people don’t interrupt you when working on a big project. If you are required to answer phones and drop-in’s immediately, schedule work when the office is less busy. 2) Structure Your Environment The place you work can have an impact on your ability to focus. Try to locate yourself so you are facing potential distractions such as doors, phones or windows. This way you can take a glance to assess sounds that would otherwise break your focus. 3) Clarify Objectives Know what your goal is clearly before you start. If you aren’t sure what the end result is, the confusion will make it impossible to focus. 4) Divide Blobs. If you have a large project that needs work, clearly identify a path that you will use to get started working on it. If the sequence of actions isn’t obvious, it will be difficult to concentrate. Taking a few minutes to plan not only your end result, but the order you will complete any steps, can save hours in wasted thinking. 5) Know the Rules Get clear on what the guidelines are for the task ahead. What level of quality do you need? What standards do you need to follow? What constraints are there? If the rules aren’t clear from the outset, you will slip out of concentration as you ponder them later. 6) Set a Deadline Deadlines have both advantages and disadvantages when trying to force concentration. A deadline can make it easier to forget the non-essential and speed up your working time. If you give yourself only an hour to design a logo, you will keep it simple and avoid fiddling with extravagant designs. Time limits have disadvantages when they cause you to worry about the time you have left instead of the task itself. 7) Break down Roadblocks Roadblocks occur whenever you hit a tricky problem in your work. This can happen when you run out of ideas or your focus wavers. Break down roadblocks by brainstorming or planning on a piece of paper. Writing out your thought processes can keep you focused even if you might become frustrated. 8) Isolate Yourself Become a hermit and stay away from other people if you want to get work done. Unless your work is based on other people they will only break your focus. Create a private space and refuse to talk to anyone until your work is finished. Put a sign on your door to steer away drop-ins and don’t answer your phone. 9) Healthy Body, Sharper Mind What you put into your body affects the way you concentrate. Nobody would expect peak performance if they showed up drunk to work. But if you allow yourself to get chronic sleep deprivation, overuse stimulants like caffeine or eat dense, fatty foods your concentration will suffer. Try to cut out one of your unhealthy habits for just thirty days to see if there is a difference in your energy levels. I’ve found even small steps can create dramatic changes in my ability to focus. 10) Be Patient Before I write an article, I often sit at my desk for a fifteen or twenty minutes before I put finger on the keyboard. During this time I feel a strong urge to leave or do something else. But I know that if I am patient, I’ll stumble upon an idea to write about and enter a state of flow. Without a little patience, you can’t take advantage of flow when it rushed through you. If you need strong concentration I recommend periods of 90-120 minutes. Any less than that and you will waste too much time getting started before the flow can continue. More than this is possible to sustain focus, but you will probably benefit from a quick break. These are the general guidelines for concentration, studying well or doing your job. Regards.
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I'm suffering from stress problem. Unable to remain happy. I feel unhappy n get angry very quickly. Even now I don't like my favorite goods, foods etc. Health is also deteriorating day by day. please advise.

Diploma in Psychological Medicine, MBBS
Psychiatrist, Mumbai
I'm suffering from stress problem. Unable to remain happy. I feel unhappy n get angry very quickly. Even now I don't ...
Lybrate-user. Stress is very subjective phenomenon. So lets discuss how to overcome it. Try to analyse your thoughts coz abnormak thoughts many times create problem for u. And you must b keeping thinking lot about them. So you need to control your thiughts and for that start meditation and yoga which would strengthen your mind. Cultivate your hobbies start following an organised schedule for your day talk to your frndz except about steess. Give quality time time to your family. Write your good thoughts and achievements in a diary. Write your plans in a diary. And start brisk walk everyday or at least 4days a week. And you r really depressed you can consukt a psychiatrist! please take care of yourself!
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I am don't feel like getting physical with my wife. I want to have sex with other woman. Even I feel like having sex with my sister in law. I have been masturbating thinking of her. Please let me know how I could get out of it. My wife is about to deliver a kid in few days but my thoughts for my sister in law is getting stronger n stronger. Need help.

BHMS
Homeopath, Amritsar
I am don't feel like getting physical with my wife. I want to have sex with other woman. Even I feel like having sex ...
Go for meditation. Respects relstions. Do mastubste with your wife hand. Take lasa detoxofier 1-1 capsile twice daily. One food suppliment will help you take world best suppliment lasa spiruline 1-1 tablet twice daily
233 people found this helpful
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Hello! I am 22 years old male and my memory is becoming weak. Would plss suggest me the ways so that I can improve my memory power.

Reparenting Technique, BA, BEd
Psychologist, Bangalore
You may be under stress fro some reason and you will need to meet with a counselor to sort that out. Do some of these recommendations very faithfully: Daily exercise of at least half an hour is a must. Even if you go to a gym, ask for aerobic and/or callisthenic exercises with whatever else you are doing. A healthy body harbors a healthy mind. With regard to memory, it is very important that your brain and body is ideally rested to be able to recall whatever is required, rather comfortably. Puzzles pose problems to the brain that help it to use new pathways and neurons, which give the brain considerable exercise. It taxes the left brain to use logic to solve the myriad possibilities which other activities do not stimulate. Crosswords are excellent for vocabulary learning and use. Jigsaws and Rubik cube stimulate different permutations to finally settle on the most likely one. Picture completion and anagrams help approach problem solving from several angles. Do Sudoku, and memory co-relation activities and skills. Have a good night’s sleep, have a good breakfast of more proteins, meditate often, remain free of stress, eat a lot of fiber (whole grains, fruits and vegetables), nuts, avocado, eat dark chocolate, consume less of fat and use olive oil instead, do Yoga meditation exercises, etc. You need to check out if you are stronger visual or auditory. The visual is a better mode than the auditory. However, if you combine the two modes, you will get the best concentration. Have a special place of learning, which should be well lit, with soft painted walls, well-ventilated, with no distractions. When you get bored, study by writing. If you repeat learning at least five to seven times, you will apparently remember for a longer time. Sit comfortably but do not slouch. The reading material should be of a fairly large print. Study at small intervals of about 40 minutes and then take a break or change the subject. Short-term memory is a faculty of the left brain, and long-term memory is a feature of the right brain. When people are stressed, they tend to favor the right brain and abandon the left brain, where short-term memory resides. So, it is really very simple: deal with the stress and activate left brain functions. Here are a few suggestions to activate left brain function: shut your left nostril and breathe, move your eyes from right to left and vice versa for at least half a minute at a time, and do callisthenic exercises with some form of counting, regularly. There is a new exercise called Super Brain Yoga, which is done by holding the right earlobe with your left thumb and index finger, and the left earlobe with your right hand’s thumb and index finger. In this position you must squat down and rise up and do this for five minutes every day. There are some memory enhancing techniques and study methods that your teacher will be able to guide you with. If your home life is full of distractions and stress, it is likely to affect your memory, adversely. In that case, I suggest that the family goes for counseling too. The following foods do help too: Blueberries, walnuts, turmeric, Spinach, tomatoes, broccoli, acorn squash, green tea, oily fish, boiled egg, turkey, apples, oatmeal, leafy greens, lentils, pumpkin seeds, avocado, cinnamon, thyme, sunflower seeds, and red wine. Avoid junk food.
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Smoking

MD PULMONARY, DTCD
Pulmonologist, Faridabad
Every puff of smoking brings one near to Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (copd ).
7 people found this helpful

How To free Mind From Stress. If I hav Very Minor prblm in Life. Till my Mind become stressful For That minor problem wat to do.

Ph. D - Psychology, Professional Certified Coach
Psychologist, Ahmedabad
How To free Mind From Stress.
If I hav Very Minor prblm in Life.
Till my Mind become stressful For That minor problem...
When line of negativity feels long and strong. Slowly one need to work on building positivity back. I will suggest you few things below, incorporating them slowly in your day will help you make this transition. If you have something which happened recently which is making you feel negative then may be you need to talk to someone about it specifically to figure out the best way to deal with the situation. What you are feeling is conic stress due to our fast life style. You could also this as feeling burnout. To begin with doing guided progressive muscular relaxation before sleeping will help you relax. You could google and download an audio file. I would also suggest you to take a multiple small break to take 3 nice and deep breath while keeping your eyes closed. You could do this while sitting or standing or while even walking or climbing stairs (keep your eyes open in that case). When you take a nice and deep break there is actual physiological change in your body. Thus will help you to activate parasympathetic nervous system which promotes relaxation and helps you calm down and think more clearly. This will also actually improve your performance in your work. Along with this exercise is one of the best way to relive stress and stay fit. Engage in any kind of physical activity at least 4 times a week. This also helps in stress reduction. Along with this some relaxation exercises as well as engaging in joyful activities such as music, singing, dancing, reading, being in nature, gardening, talking with friends or anything which you enjoy will help reducing stress and rejuvenation of your mind and body. Have good routine for sleep and eating. Lot of research has now proven that sugar is very harmful for our health. Reduce sugar and refined white floor in your diet as much as you could. Along with this also increase consumption of raw vegetables in the form of salad in both the meals of your day. If you need help in exploring what works best for you and make this into your life style do let me know. As a trained wellness coach I could help you tailored your own holistic wellness program. Hope this helps if you are interested in short 4 to 8 week resilience training you may contact me. Wishing you very best.
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I smoke 8 times a day. Still want to increase. Tell me how to make my mind to decrease.

Reparenting Technique, BA, BEd
Psychologist, Bangalore
That effect is called the increasing tolerance for the substance. For all addictive substances the body and mind can tolerate it and more and more of the substance is required to have the same effect as the first time you the the substance. Tobacco consumption, either through smoke or other edible forms, is always harmful. The desire to quit is a good starting point. The best way to quit is to know more about the ill-effects of tobacco. The knowledge is astounding and scary. That information itself should help you to want to quit. The tobacco tar in cigarette smoke lines your lung with huge patches that make that portion dysfunctional. Your oxygen carrying capacity is jeopardized, and breathing is impinged. The nicotine in tobacco smoke stimulates the heart beat to raise the blood pressure in no time at all. There are more than 4000 harmful chemicals in cigarette smoke!!! You will need to stop smoking or consuming any tobacco related items with immediate effect. Then you need to identify why you smoke: there is an oral need, the nicotine effect, the psychological effect of covering up some other issue, for style, to impress, etc. You may discover that the reasons may be unimportant at this stage because you have become too addicted and the habit has become compulsive. You should start exercises, gradually increasing it over a period of time. Do deep breathing exercises every time you feel like smoking (try Yoga), and replace the oral urge with some healthy food substitute to satiate the need. You may take hard candy or chewing gum. If the urge is too strong, then use nicotine chewing gum or nicotine patches, for a little while until the smoking drive reduces substantially. You may join Smokers Anonymous in your city where the support is really extraordinary for like-minded people who are also in the same situation. Keep yourself occupied or engaged with interesting activities during the times when it is most tempting. Keep the company of non-smokers for some time i.e. at least for the first 21 days. Above all announce it to everyone that you have quit smoking. Here’s a piece of very good advice: even if you accidentally/willfully take a cigarette, it is not the end of the world – you can start the cessation all over again. Don’t be discouraged because it is not too late even now to reverse all the ill-effects of smoking. You must persevere with the best support until you defeat this addiction. Counseling is very useful in the initial stages and when temptations are at their highest.
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My question pertains to a psychologist or to a clinical psychologist. Me, my wife and my younger sister were living together till 15 months of our marriage. I am a Govt Employee and works on a critical position which requires lots of maturity, gratitude and mental strength. Now from past 7 months Me and my wife are living separately after a series of quarrels between us. My major problem with her was:- A). Her incompetence in terms of dealing with simple situations and her immaturity in taking day to day decisions. B). She was low on confidence and poor in learning, even while being with a cooperative nature. C). She was a stubborn and possibly a person with acute inferiority complex. I used to be too particular about things and with an angry nature. I think I've been very very Successful in coping up with my impulsive anger and I've made relevant changes in myself. Though I've loosed hope that she could turn out to be a mature girl at all. But It was only her emotional cooperation because of which I'm trying consulting you to figure out if I should go for a divorce or should I still give our relationship a chance and if yes Doctor, then how can I expect a change in her? I've a soft corner for her somewhere in me however when I recall her kiddishness, my mind says its better to divorce and search for a person with same mental level. It's a life call. please guide

Reparenting Technique, BA, BEd
Psychologist, Bangalore
You are better off with this girl than with an over-smart girl whose demands may be more than one can handle. While it is prudent to have an educated girl who reaches your mental level of compatibility, the issues you describe are matters that can be resolved with some counseling, really. Anyway, my advice to all couples is to first do everything in their capacity to find resolutions and only then, if the situation is very difficult, should you consider divorce. If you fail do do this, you may have regrets and your conscience may disturb you enough to really trouble you later wherever you go. This soft corner you have for her is really love, and you must not neglect that feeling you have for her, by not doing the right thing. You must also think of her and whether this nature of hers is because of some contribution from her upbringing and it would do good to help her, through with some professional help. In other words you cannot blame her all the way for any failure on her family's side in her upbringing. Be patient, love her tenderly, coax the best part of her to the fore with yoru maturity, and let her simplicity be, as an asset to her innocence. It is not true always that matching education brings about good relations: in fact it may have the reverse effect. These kind of girls make good wives but probably bad companions. This latter you can find in other relationships, subject to your keeping them clean. The home is made of loving hearts, and for that you can go to the ends of the earth to find one: I believe you have one there right in your home. Please go back to her and work with a professional to iron out the problem areas and to help you live with and in love.
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Could not sleep nd eat well due to depression. suffering with severe gastric problem.

L L. B..,, M.Sc psychy,, N L P, P.G.D.G.C, M.S psychotherapy,, M.A child care, M A, clinical psy, M.A,social psychiatry,, M.Phil., psychology., Ph.D .,psychology
Psychologist, Vijayawada
Could not sleep nd eat well due to depression. suffering with severe gastric problem.
Without proper sleep and not eating anything it may effect on the gastric problem. Sleep well and diet food. Do not take undiet food. Take rest. Do not think too much about sleep. Normal sleep is the good for health. Do not take any medicine for sleep. It may be addiction. Develop busy schedule. Do hard work day time. Before going to bed do some work. Read books or newspapers or some personal work in home. After tired then go to bed. Do not go to bed with sleeping command. Sleep will not coming on your request. It may come automatically. Do any exercises walking before going go to bed. Fresh before bed. Read pleasantly. Then automatically sleep comes. When sleep problem solved then your gastric pain is also solved. Ok follow my suggestions. Best of luck. Have a good day.
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I am very depressed because I haven't got any job and my B. Ed is completed in July whenever I sit alone I feel kya life h na job losar h na kuch on the other hand my sister is teaching in cms and feel like mra kabhi kuch hoga b k ni bathe bathe ek dm se uljhan hoti h k I should go away from all these things my confidence is also loosing.

Ph. D - Psychology
Psychologist, Delhi
I am very depressed because I haven't got any job and my B. Ed is completed in July whenever I sit alone I feel kya l...
Hello Lybrate-user, 1. You just recently completed your education give yourself sometime. 2. You will definitely find a job that you love. Have faith in your capabilities. 3. Don't hurry yourself into the first job you get, choose wisely. 4. You have to view yourself in a positive light in order to grow or change for the better. 5. Don't compare yourself to your sister, you each have your own individual journey. 6. Take up an activity you enjoy or exercise, you could play a sport you love or dance. This is the best time for you to develop a skill. If you still continue to feel low about this you can book an appointment with us and we'll try to help you to the best of our abilities. Along with visiting us at our clinic, we also provide online as well as telephonic counseling sessions.
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I want to quit alcohol, I am 40 years old male. I can not sleep with out alcohol.

Reparenting Technique, BA, BEd
Psychologist, Bangalore
I want to quit alcohol, I am 40 years old male. I can not sleep with out alcohol.
You will have some trouble getting sleep after quitting alcohol but that will disappear with time. Regarding your drinking habit, it matters a lot that you feel like drinking every day, and as long as you need your drink you are in trouble. This could lead to increased tolerance levels so that over time you will need to drink more to get the same or greater effect. You need to identify why you need to drink, and go back into your childhood to find out other influences on your personality that makes you prone to addiction. Meet with an addiction counselor and work with them to sort out this drive. You already display the classic tendency to first obsess about it and then compulsively feel driven to meet that need. The simplest thing to do is to do some other interesting activity during the evening times. Meet your oral need with some other non-intoxicating drink like soups, juices, and sodas with lime, etc. If you think that you will find it very difficult, then admit yourself to a hospital and go for de-addiction: which normally lasts for about two weeks. Then follow that up with addiction counseling from a professional for at least three years to completely get rid of the habit. If this is also not enough, then admit yourself into a de-addiction center and stay there for at least 6 months and after that attend counseling with a professional. There are medicines that help with the drinking just to ease the initial craving. Ultimately, it is your will power and the support that you receive from the medical fraternity and your close and dear ones. You must also learn to substitute and deal with the oral need, a rigid value system, the script issue, and of course look at all the genetic factors to plan a strategy not to get into what is called ‘cross addictions’ i.e. another form of addiction that may appear alright but is in fact as bad as the primary addiction. The center or hospital and the counselor will advise and guide you on several measures and precautions you will need to take to stay with your resolve. Even after the rehabilitation you must attend AA meetings and continue this support for a long time. Your family will also need to attend some sessions and go for Al-anon meetings for their co-dependency issues. You cannot be treated in isolation because the family has gotten used to your drinking and have made some unhealthy adaptations to somehow cope. Make a serious plan with the family and whoever else’s support you can get and act on it fast. As a combination, these two therapies (counseling and rehabilitation) will aid in dealing with the addiction. It will, however, take a long time to completely come off of the enslavement.
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GREETINGS My age is 48 years old male guy, a vegetarian with no habits of drugs and alcohol. I am having a low back pain on my right side hip only after flat sleep relaxation. Especially while wake up. After that the pain disappears. The pain occur even during noon relaxation for a period of 20 to 30 minutes. Other than this body condition is normal without diabetics, bp and other diseases. Request to suggest to what to with this problem. Thank you.

MBBS, MS - Orthopaedics
Orthopedist, Delhi
GREETINGS 
My age is  48 years old male guy, a vegetarian with no habits of drugs and alcohol.
I am having a low back...
This treatment is being suggested on bases of the information provided. I would like to examine & investigate you in detail. Any way it may be tried, --. Dolokind Plus (Mankind) [Aceclofenac 100 mg +Paracetamol 350 mg 1 tab. OD & SOS. X 5 days. --. Caldikind plus (Mankind) 1 tab OD x 10 days. (You may need help of your local doctor to get these medicines.)--. Fomentation with warm water. Avoid direct flow of AC or Cooler. --. Sleep on a hard bed with soft bedding. --. Use no pillow under the head. --. Avoid painful acts & activities. -- .Do mild exercises for Back. Do not ignore, let it not become beginning of a major problem. Do ask for a detailed treatment plan. If no relief in 2-3 days, contact me again (through this platform only) Kindly make sure, there is no allergy to any of these medicines. (Contact your family doctor, if needed). For emergency treatment visit nearest hospital. I hope, I have solved your problem to your satisfaction. Kindly rate the answer.Wish you a quick recovery & good health.
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