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Dr. Talukdar Shailendra Kumar

MBBS

Psychiatrist, Guwahati

Dr. Talukdar Shailendra Kumar MBBS Psychiatrist, Guwahati
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I want all my patients to be informed and knowledgeable about their health care, from treatment plans and services, to insurance coverage....more
I want all my patients to be informed and knowledgeable about their health care, from treatment plans and services, to insurance coverage.
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Have black spots as well as pimples and my pack and irregular diet and whit loss. I am feeling angry and physically and emotional feeling.

MD - Psychiatry
Psychiatrist, Chennai
Have black spots as well as pimples and my pack and irregular diet and whit loss. I am feeling angry and physically a...
U have to send images of the black spots, it can be mole or pimples commonly. Eat healthy diet, do physical activity and have 8 hours sleep. If continuing to feel irritable and emotional, consult a psychiatrist. All the best.
2 people found this helpful
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HOW TO STOP SMOKING I want to stop smoking but I can not im 19 year old how can I stop this I tried a lot but I can not I have a mind to stop but something is not allowing me.

BASM, MD, MS (Counseling & Psychotherapy), MSc - Psychology, Certificate in Clinical psychology of children and Young People, Certificate in Psychological First Aid, Certificate in Positive Psychology
Psychologist, Palakkad
Dear lybrate-user, Welcome to Lybrate. Tobacco is addictive. Cigarette also contains 4000+ carcinogenic chemicals other than nicotine. Nicotine and other chemicals can cause cancer of different types and areas. Throat cancer, mouth cancer, lung cancer, stomach cancer and brain problems can result. Over and above smoking may also increase the risk factor of heart attack and brain stroke. Please quit smoking. The best method is to leave it and continue with your will power. There are other methods like Nicotine Replacement therapy and pharmacotherapy combined. If you’re ready to stop smoking and willing to get the support you need, you can recover from nicotine addiction and abuse abuse—no matter how bad the addiction or how powerless you feel. The first step in treating nicotine addiction is accepting that you have a problem. Confronting an addiction and accepting responsibility for your actions isn’t easy. But it’s a necessary step on the road to treatment and recovery. You should then consult a psychiatrist / psychologist who fill follow this treatment. 1. Detoxification using medicines. 2. Behavior modification with the help of therapies. 3. Counseling. 4. Medication to sustain and 5. Long term support. These given steps are essential for any addict to get effectively rid of smoking. Therefore, you need to stick to the treatment plan and cooperate with your psychiatrist / psychologist. Mind power building therapy, motivation therapy etc should help you doing so. Take care.
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I have squint in my eyes and so I had deal with a lot of psychological problems throughout my life and now when I am 22 looking forward to be in a relationship but I never get response. The opposite sex makes fun of my deformity. How mean they are, so my life is like this I get attract, I have expectations, girls reject and I get depressed. Flow chart attraction-expectation-rejection-depression. And I get following thoughts how much contribution does personality has in success of person why god is so partial, there is a saying that god made or gave everyone equal, I completely disagree with this statement. I have seen little kids with lot of talent in them and compared to them god gave me nothing. What a foolish creation of universe god has made. I don' t feel like believing god please do not say me to meet with the counsellor, I already met with the counsellor but still I am not able to enjoy the life, I even tried to ignore my desires of having in a relationship, but mind is mind it is very difficult to control or ignore desires, my desires are troubling me a lot, I have constantly raising questions through this forum about negative thinking, why the hell I think so negative, its been 5 to 7 years that I am thinking negative and want to know the source of my negative thinking but weird answers are posted in this forum and I am getting the answer knowing the source will not solve the problem. I am so pessimistic that I had a college drop and I had to switch jobs after two or three months as I am unable to concentrate, I daydream a lot even when I am bathing even when I am in toilet so lot of issues are created due to my daydreaming, which I can not disclose but when I listen to music, songs I feel overwhelmed with thoughts or emotions and I can not concentrate on the work given to me. I get angry easily as I am pessimist and I had a verbal confrontation every now and then. Peace of mind is never there, presence of mind is also not there, I am absent minded most of the time, I also shake my legs a lot when I am thinking and I get startled easily, I can not concentrate on the work as sometimes music takes charge of my mind and I get overwhelmed with thoughts and the output is mess, there are lot of errors in my work. Am in depression, anxiety or any other disorder, I know I am too much dependent on others for my confidence like I am suffering from identity crisis.

B.Sc(Hons) Mumbai Univ., ND, MD - Alternate Medicine, Aroma Therap., Bach Flower Rem, Mental Health Cert.
Alternative Medicine Specialist, Mumbai
I have squint in my eyes and so I had deal with a lot of psychological problems throughout my life and now when I am ...
Hi my friend do not blame god. We have to conquer our mind and overcome problems. Do not be afraid. Be bold and positive. A good day will come for you. I will prescribe you some harmless flower remedy available at all homoeo shops. Mix 7 drops of gorse + 5 drops of rock rose + 5 drops of sweet chestnut + 7 drops of gentian + 7 drops of mimulus. Mix these with 50 ml water and take every 12 hours. By this you will have a calm mind. Ok do not worry.
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Hey sir I am student I m unable to concentrate on my study please suggest something.

Reparenting Technique, BA, BEd
Psychologist, Bangalore
I suspect that the adolescent issues with regard to hormones may be affecting your ability to concentrate and remember. When the hormones play up, it lasts for a period of close to two years and during that time you could be influenced by three signs directly impacted by the chemical: you will tend to become aggressive and rebellious, you will become sexually active, and you will have acne and pimple problems. The hormonal imbalances may not only impact your memory because of the chemical but also bring some distractions that come with it. But you may work on the following even if the hormones kick in: Daily exercise of at least half an hour is a must. Even if you go to a gym, ask for aerobic and/or callisthenic exercises with whatever else you are doing. A healthy body harbors a healthy mind. With regard to memory, it is very important that your brain and body is ideally rested to be able to recall whatever is required, rather comfortably. Puzzles pose problems to the brain that help it to use new pathways and neurons, which give the brain considerable exercise. It taxes the left brain to use logic to solve the myriad possibilities which other activities do not stimulate. Crosswords are excellent for vocabulary learning and use. Jigsaws and Rubik cube stimulate different permutations to finally settle on the most likely one. Picture completion and anagrams help approach problem solving from several angles. Do Sudoku, and memory co-relation activities and skills. Have a good night’s sleep, have a good breakfast of more proteins, meditate often, remain free of stress, eat a lot of fiber (whole grains, fruits and vegetables), nuts, avocado, eat dark chocolate, consume less of fat and use olive oil instead, do Yoga meditation exercises, etc. You need to check out if you are stronger visual or auditory. The visual is a better mode than the auditory. However, if you combine the two modes, you will get the best concentration. Have a special place of learning, which should be well lit, with soft painted walls, well-ventilated, with no distractions. When you get bored, study by writing. If you repeat learning at least five to seven times, you will apparently remember for a longer time. Sit comfortably but do not slouch. The reading material should be of a fairly large print. Study at small intervals of about 40 minutes and then take a break or change the subject. Short-term memory is a faculty of the left brain, and long-term memory is a feature of the right brain. When people are stressed, they tend to favor the right brain and abandon the left brain, where short-term memory resides. So, it is really very simple: deal with the stress and activate left brain functions. Here are a few suggestions to activate left brain function: shut your left nostril and breathe, move your eyes from right to left and vice versa for at least half a minute at a time, and do callisthenic exercises with some form of counting, regularly. There is a new exercise called Super Brain Yoga, which is done by holding the right earlobe with your left thumb and index finger, and the left earlobe with your right hand’s thumb and index finger. In this position you must squat down and rise up and do this for five minutes every day. There are some memory enhancing techniques and study methods that your teacher will be able to guide you with. If your home life is full of distractions and stress, it is likely to affect your memory, adversely. In that case, I suggest that the family goes for counseling too. The following foods do help too: Blueberries, walnuts, turmeric, Spinach, tomatoes, broccoli, acorn squash, green tea, oily fish, boiled egg, turkey, apples, oatmeal, leafy greens, lentils, pumpkin seeds, avocado, cinnamon, thyme, sunflower seeds, and red wine. Avoid sugar and junk food.
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I have been feeling anxiety and fatigue in day time and less sleep in night, please advice regarding solution and guidance for same.

(MRCPSYCH-UK), MD - Psychiatry, MBBS
Psychiatrist, Hyderabad
I have been feeling anxiety and fatigue in day time and less sleep in night, please advice regarding solution and gui...
These can be symptoms of depressive illness or anxiety disorder. Anxiety and depressive illness is a medical/psychiatric illness that can be treated effectively by antidepressants and cognitive behavior therapy. So one has to see a psychiatrist at the earliest. Psychiatrist after assessment and evaluation will decide on the best antidepressant medication that is suitable to you. These antidepressant medications are not sedatives or addictive in a nature. The course may last for 4-6 months depending upon the severity of the illness.
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I am gone to depression from 1 year. About think my past situations. How can I get got of it? Any solution.

MD - Psychiatry
Psychiatrist, Chennai
I am gone to depression from 1 year. About think my past situations. How can I get got of it? Any solution.
The word depressed is a common everyday word. People might say" i'm depressed" when in fact they mean" i'm fed up because i've had a row, or failed an exam, or lost my job" etc. These ups and downs of life are common and normal. Most people recover quite quickly. With true depression, you have a low mood and other symptoms each day for at least two weeks The common symptoms are (few might be present in a person with depression) Feelings of sadness, tearfulness, emptiness or hopelessness Angry outbursts, irritability or frustration, even over small matters Loss of interest or pleasure in most or all normal activities, such as sex, hobbies or sports Sleep disturbances, including insomnia or sleeping too much Tiredness and lack of energy, so even small tasks take extra effort Changes in appetite — often reduced appetite and weight loss, but increased cravings for food and weight gain in some people Anxiety, agitation or restlessness Slowed thinking, speaking or body movements Feelings of worthlessness or guilt, fixating on past failures or blaming yourself for things that aren't your responsibility Trouble thinking, concentrating, making decisions and remembering things Frequent or recurrent thoughts of death, suicidal thoughts, suicide attempts or suicide Unexplained physical problems, such as back pain or headaches.
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What are way to improve brain thinking capacity? What's it's treatment or natural treatment.

BASM, MD, MS (Counseling & Psychotherapy), MSc - Psychology, Certificate in Clinical psychology of children and Young People, Certificate in Psychological First Aid, Certificate in Positive Psychology
Psychologist, Palakkad
Dear lybrate-user, welcome to lybrate. Memory and mind power depends mainly on three aspects. Understanding, storage and recollection. To understand what you are studying, you must be able to be attentive or concentrate. Concentration is possible when you are interested in that subject. Creative way of learning can help you concentrate and understand easily. When you are able to understand and concentrate, it is stored within your brain. If you read more and more it will be store in long term memory. Third part is retrieval. Whenever you want to retrive what you learned and stored, your brain gets the request, searches the database and retrieves the information for you. The retrieval may prove to be difficult if you are anxious, stressed, worried or tired physically or mentally. Retrieval is more easy when you are relaxed and healthy. Brain needs nutrients to keep itself sharp. Fruits, vegetables and dry fruits provide much needed nutrients for your brain. Include at least one fruit in your daily diet. Physical exercises, entertainment, hobbies, relaxation, memory games like sudoku etc help keep your memory sharp and active. Take care.
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I lost my girl friend. She was my heart and someone just took her away from me for the lifetime and I wanna suicide. Just give me a solution.

MBBS
General Physician, Mumbai
I lost my girl friend. She was my heart and someone just took her away from me for the lifetime and I wanna suicide. ...
Be brave and now you look for some one else and remember WHATEVER HAPPENS TO YOU IN TERMS OF RELATIONSHIP IS GOOD AND SOME THING BEST IS WRITTEN IN YOUR DESTINY
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My brother is depressed due to its previous decision that he taken in his life. He has become negative. please suggest me some perception.

BAMS, MD Ayurveda
Sexologist, Lonavala
My brother is depressed due to its previous decision that he taken in his life. He has become negative. please sugges...
With the stresses and strains of modern life, most people are suffering some form of tension at a mental level. This may be expressed by such emotions as depression, anxiety, irritability, insecurity or a general feeling of dissatisfaction. Ayurveda advises therapies, lifestyle adjustments and herbal preparations that clear and strengthen the mind allowing us to cope with life's challenges more effectively and also bring positivity to our lives at all levels
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Sir/Mam I am 24 year old student. Sir/mam mai 3 dino se depression me hu, study ki wjh se, aur iski wajh se mai sochte 2 so jata hu. Mai 24 h me 12 h so rhq hu, aur din bhar kuch nhi kr pata hu. Please mai kya kru.

C.S.C, D.C.H, M.B.B.S
General Physician,
Sir/Mam I am 24 year old student.
Sir/mam mai 3 dino se depression me hu, study ki wjh se, aur iski wajh se mai socht...
You have to concentrate mind and try natural antidepressant methods and if not useful need medicines .5 Ways to Fight Depression If you feel depressed, it's best to do something about it — depression doesn't just go away on its own. In addition to getting help from a doctor or therapist, here are 5 things you can do to feel better. 1. Exercise. Take a 15- to 30-minute brisk walk every day — or dance, jog, or bike if you prefer. People who are depressed may not feel much like being active. In addition to getting aerobic exercise, some yoga poses can help relieve feelings of depression. Two other aspects of yoga — breathing exercises and meditation — can also help people with depression feel better. 2. Nurture yourself with good nutrition. Depression can affect appetite. One person may not feel like eating at all, but another might overeat.. Proper nutrition can influence a person's mood and energy. So eat plenty of fruits and vegetables and get regular meals (even if you don't feel hungry, try to eat something light, like a piece of fruit, to keep you going). 3. Identify troubles, but don't dwell on them. Try to identify any situations that have contributed to your depression. When you know what's got you feeling blue and why, talk about it with a caring friend. Talking is a way to release the feelings and to receive some understanding. 4. Express yourself. With depression, a person's creativity and sense of fun may seem blocked. Exercise your imagination (painting, drawing, doodling, sewing, writing, dancing, composing music, etc.) and you not only get those creative juices flowing, you also loosen up some positive emotions. Take time to play with a friend or a pet, or do something fun for yourself. Find something to laugh about — a funny movie, perhaps. Laughter helps lighten your mood. 5. Try to notice good things. Depression affects a person's thoughts, making everything seem dismal, negative, and hopeless. If depression has you noticing only the negative, make an effort to notice the good things in life. Try to notice one thing, then try to think of one more. Consider your strengths, gifts, or blessings. Most of all, don't forget to be patient with yourself. Depression takes time to heal. If you are happy with these answers please click on "useful” link so that I can know my efforts are not wasted. If you want more clarifications or prescription for medicines consult me on this site to ask me directly and not in open questions session
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Suggest me to how to quite smoking and clean up my lungs. Suggest me I got like allergy on my chest.

Reparenting Technique, BA, BEd
Psychologist, Bangalore
You have to quit cold turkey because the body and mind will torture you endlessly while attempting a reduction in smoking. The tobacco tar in cigarette smoke lines your lung with huge patches that make that portion dysfunctional. Your oxygen carrying capacity is jeopardized, and breathing is impinged on. But don’t be discouraged because it is not too late even now to reverse all the ill-effects of smoking. I don’t know what other organs could be damaged but do go for a thorough medical check-up to assess the effects of your abuse. Regarding improving your lungs, do a lot of aerobic exercise breathing through your nostrils only. Then there are a lot of deep breathing exercises in Yoga which you can learn too. Deep breathing cleanses your system and lungs and restores it to good health. Deep breathing uses the 80% of the lungs which are not normally used in normal breathing and even when exerting yourself. The greatest effect is in the lungs because this substance is processed through the respiratory system directly through the lung surface. When quitting, you must take one day at a time; though you must give up all smoking at once, and promptly. If you look too far ahead you will get discouraged and will give up. If you sit and count the number of days you have given up, that will also focus too much on achievement. You must focus on the here and now, on that day to be precise. After all quitting is not that easy due to many factors. So even if you fail one day, you must try and try again. Very few people succeed in their first attempt. Your persistence will eventually pay off. The urge to discontinue is hampered by many factors but the worst of them is the conditioning. In fact, these conditions can exist all through the day, unlike other addictions. But your desire to want to stop is the most important factor. It is important to find out about the ill-effects of smoking to have a reason that alarms you about continuing the habit. The information is really scary but true and you must remind yourself about this every day. The nicotine in tobacco smoke stimulates the heartbeat to raise the blood pressure in no time at all. So you must avoid it like the plague: it is just very bad medicine for you. In fact, it is highly toxic too. You will need to stop smoking or consuming any tobacco related items with immediate effect. You should start vigorous exercises, gradually increasing it over a period of time. Do deep breathing exercises every time you feel like smoking (try Yoga), and replace the oral urge with some healthy food substitute to satiate the need. You may also take hard candy or chew gum. If the urge is too strong, then use nicotine gums and nicotine patches, for a little while until the smoking drive reduces, substantially. You may also join Smokers Anonymous in your city where the support is really extraordinary for like-minded people who are also in the same situation. Keep yourself occupied or engaged with interesting activities during the times when it is most tempting. Keep the company of non-smokers for some time i.e. At least for the first 21 days. Above all announce it to everyone that you have quit smoking. Here’s a piece of very good advice: even if you accidentally/willfully take a cigarette, it is not the end of the world – you can start the cessation all over again. You must persevere with the best support until you defeat this addiction. Counseling is very useful in the initial stages and when temptations are at their highest. You could also join twitter2quit program and enjoy its success to give up smoking.
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C.S.C, D.C.H, M.B.B.S
General Physician,
Quit smoking

Follow 5 As (Ask, Advise, Assess, Assist, Arrange)

Assessing tobacco use status during healthcare visits increases the likelihood of smoking-related discussions between patients and clinicians, as well as increases smoking cessation rates.
All smokers should be advised to quit smoking. Even brief advice to quit has been shown to increase quit rates.
For smokers who are willing to quit, manage them with combination of behavioral support and pharmacologic therapy
Behavioral intervention generally consists of brief clinician counseling in the office, but smokers should also be referred to a free telephone quit line
Smokers who fail to quit on an adequate trial of first-line pharmacotherapy may benefit from second line pharmacotherapy.
Also attempt to intensify behavioral counseling.
Patients who successfully quit but experience relapse be treated with a pharmacologic agent that previously helped the patient to achieve abstinence and was tolerable
Enhancing treatment by adding another pharmacologic agent or more intensive behavioral support can also be considered.
Smokers can also be advised about the health risks of secondhand smoke exposure to their household members and urged to commit to keeping their home and car smoke-free, especially if children are present.

5As of quitting Smoking

Ask: Implement an office wide system that ensures that, for every patient at every clinic visit, tobacco-use status is queried and documented. Repeated assessment is not necessary in the case of the adult who has never used tobacco or has not used tobacco for many years, and for whom this information is clearly documented in the medical record.

Advise: Strongly urge all tobacco users to quit in a clear, strong, personalized manner. Advice should be clear - "I think it is important for you to quit smoking now and I can help you" "Cutting down while you are ill is not enough" It should be "As your clinician, I need you to know that quitting smoking is the most important thing you can do to protect your health now and in the future. The clinic staff and I will help you" and it should be personalized. Tie tobacco use to current health/illness, and/or its social and economic costs, motivation level/readiness to quit, and/or the impact of tobacco use on children and others in the household.

Access: Determine the patient's willingness to quit smoking within the next 30 days; If the patient is willing to make a quit attempt at this time, provide assistance; If the patient will participate in an intensive treatment, deliver such a treatment or refer to an intensive intervention; If the patient clearly states he or she is unwilling to make a quit attempt at this time, provide a motivational intervention and If the patient is a member of a special population (adolescent, pregnant smoker), provide additional information specific to that population.

Assist: Provide aid for the person to quit.

Arrange: Schedule follow-up contact, either in person or by telephone. Follow-up contact should occur soon after the quit date, preferably during the first week. A second follow-up contact is recommended within the first month. Schedule further follow-up contacts as indicated.

Congratulate success during each follow-up. If tobacco use has occurred, review circumstances and elicit recommitment to total abstinence. Remind the person that a lapse can be used as a learning experience. Identify problems already encountered and anticipate challenges in the immediate future.

Hi sir I'm 26 years old boy From last 2 years I became full negative minded in all cases so pls tell me how to over come from negative mind. I'm doing meditation daily morning. Is there any tablets to overcome from negative mind.

MSc Psychotherapy -King's College- London, Pg diploma in counselling
Psychologist, Gurgaon
Hi sir
 I'm 26 years old boy
From last 2 years I became full negative minded in all cases so pls tell me how to over ...
Dear lybrate-user, even if there were tables I will not advise you to take them, meds should always be your last option. Try to spot the positive things happening to you everyday and write them down. We are programmed to pay more attention to negative things thn to the positive ones. You must work on developing positive lenses. Life is more fun that way! all the best.
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I lose my lover last week and since then feel very depressed and prefer keeping to myself all the time. Pls help me.

MBBS, MD - Psychiatry, MBA (Healthcare)
Psychiatrist, Davanagere
I lose my lover last week and since then feel very depressed and prefer keeping to myself all the time. Pls help me.
Hi there ~ Coping with Grief and Loss Losing someone or something you love or care deeply about is very painful. You may experience all kinds of difficult emotions and it may feel like the pain and sadness you're experiencing will never let up. These are normal reactions to a significant loss. But while there is no right or wrong way to grieve, there are healthy ways to cope with the pain that, in time, can renew you and permit you to move on. What is grief? Grief is a natural response to loss. It’s the emotional suffering you feel when something or someone you love is taken away. The more significant the loss, the more intense the grief will be. You may associate grief with the death of a loved one—which is often the cause of the most intense type of grief—but any loss can cause grief, including: Divorce or relationship breakup Loss of health Losing a job Loss of financial stability A miscarriage Retirement Death of a pet Loss of a cherished dream A loved one’s serious illness Loss of a friendship Loss of safety after a trauma Selling the family home The more significant the loss, the more intense the grief. However, even subtle losses can lead to grief. For example, you might experience grief after moving away from home, graduating from college, changing jobs, selling your family home, or retiring from a career you loved. Everyone grieves differently Grieving is a personal and highly individual experience. How you grieve depends on many factors, including your personality and coping style, your life experience, your faith, and the nature of the loss. The grieving process takes time. Healing happens gradually; it can’t be forced or hurried—and there is no “normal” timetable for grieving. Some people start to feel better in weeks or months. For others, the grieving process is measured in years. Whatever your grief experience, it’s important to be patient with yourself and allow the process to naturally unfold. Myths and facts about grief MYTH: The pain will go away faster if you ignore it. Fact: Trying to ignore your pain or keep it from surfacing will only make it worse in the long run. For real healing it is necessary to face your grief and actively deal with it. MYTH: It’s important to be “be strong” in the face of loss. Fact: Feeling sad, frightened, or lonely is a normal reaction to loss. Crying doesn’t mean you are weak. You don’t need to “protect” your family or friends by putting on a brave front. Showing your true feelings can help them and you. MYTH: If you don’t cry, it means you aren’t sorry about the loss. Fact: Crying is a normal response to sadness, but it’s not the only one. Those who don’t cry may feel the pain just as deeply as others. They may simply have other ways of showing it. MYTH: Grief should last about a year. Fact: There is no right or wrong time frame for grieving. How long it takes can differ from person to person. Source: Center for Grief and Healing Are there stages of grief? In 1969, psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross introduced what became known as the “five stages of grief.” These stages of grief were based on her studies of the feelings of patients facing terminal illness, but many people have generalized them to other types of negative life changes and losses, such as the death of a loved one or a break-up. The five stages of grief: Denial: “This can’t be happening to me.” Anger: “Why is this happening? Who is to blame?” Bargaining: “Make this not happen, and in return I will ____.” Depression: “I’m too sad to do anything.” Acceptance: “I’m at peace with what happened.” If you are experiencing any of these emotions following a loss, it may help to know that your reaction is natural and that you’ll heal in time. However, not everyone who grieves goes through all of these stages—and that’s okay. Contrary to popular belief, you do not have to go through each stage in order to heal. In fact, some people resolve their grief without going through any of these stages. And if you do go through these stages of grief, you probably won’t experience them in a neat, sequential order, so don’t worry about what you “should” be feeling or which stage you’re supposed to be in. Kübler-Ross herself never intended for these stages to be a rigid framework that applies to everyone who mourns. In her last book before her death in 2004, she said of the five stages of grief: “They were never meant to help tuck messy emotions into neat packages. They are responses to loss that many people have, but there is not a typical response to loss, as there is no typical loss. Our grieving is as individual as our lives.” Grief can be a roller coaster Instead of a series of stages, we might also think of the grieving process as a roller coaster, full of ups and downs, highs and lows. Like many roller coasters, the ride tends to be rougher in the beginning, the lows may be deeper and longer. The difficult periods should become less intense and shorter as time goes by, but it takes time to work through a loss. Even years after a loss, especially at special events such as a family wedding or the birth of a child, we may still experience a strong sense of grief. Source: Hospice Foundation of America Common symptoms of grief While loss affects people in different ways, many experience the following symptoms when they’re grieving. Just remember that almost anything that you experience in the early stages of grief is normal—including feeling like you’re going crazy, feeling like you’re in a bad dream, or questioning your religious beliefs. Shock and disbelief – Right after a loss, it can be hard to accept what happened. You may feel numb, have trouble believing that the loss really happened, or even deny the truth. If someone you love has died, you may keep expecting him or her to show up, even though you know he or she is gone. Sadness – Profound sadness is probably the most universally experienced symptom of grief. You may have feelings of emptiness, despair, yearning, or deep loneliness. You may also cry a lot or feel emotionally unstable. Guilt – You may regret or feel guilty about things you did or didn’t say or do. You may also feel guilty about certain feelings (e.g. Feeling relieved when the person died after a long, difficult illness). After a death, you may even feel guilty for not doing something to prevent the death, even if there was nothing more you could have done. Anger – Even if the loss was nobody’s fault, you may feel angry and resentful. If you lost a loved one, you may be angry with yourself, God, the doctors, or even the person who died for abandoning you. You may feel the need to blame someone for the injustice that was done to you. Fear – A significant loss can trigger a host of worries and fears. You may feel anxious, helpless, or insecure. You may even have panic attacks. The death of a loved one can trigger fears about your own mortality, of facing life without that person, or the responsibilities you now face alone. Physical symptoms – We often think of grief as a strictly emotional process, but grief often involves physical problems, including fatigue, nausea, lowered immunity, weight loss or weight gain, aches and pains, and insomnia. Coping with grief and loss tip 1: Get support The single most important factor in healing from loss is having the support of other people. Even if you aren’t comfortable talking about your feelings under normal circumstances, it’s important to express them when you’re grieving. Sharing your loss makes the burden of grief easier to carry. Wherever the support comes from, accept it and do not grieve alone. Connecting to others will help you heal. Finding support after a loss Turn to friends and family members – Now is the time to lean on the people who care about you, even if you take pride in being strong and self-sufficient. Draw loved ones close, rather than avoiding them, and accept the assistance that’s offered. Oftentimes, people want to help but don’t know how, so tell them what you need—whether it’s a shoulder to cry on or help with funeral arrangements. Draw comfort from your faith – If you follow a religious tradition, embrace the comfort its mourning rituals can provide. Spiritual activities that are meaningful to you—such as praying, meditating, or going to church—can offer solace. If you’re questioning your faith in the wake of the loss, talk to a clergy member or others in your religious community. Join a support group – Grief can feel very lonely, even when you have loved ones around. Sharing your sorrow with others who have experienced similar losses can help. To find a bereavement support group in your area, contact local hospitals, hospices, funeral homes, and counseling centers. Talk to a therapist or grief counselor – If your grief feels like too much to bear, call a mental health professional with experience in grief counseling. An experienced therapist can help you work through intense emotions and overcome obstacles to your grieving. Coping with grief and loss tip 2: Take care of yourself When you’re grieving, it’s more important than ever to take care of yourself. The stress of a major loss can quickly deplete your energy and emotional reserves. Looking after your physical and emotional needs will help you get through this difficult time. Face your feelings. You can try to suppress your grief, but you can’t avoid it forever. In order to heal, you have to acknowledge the pain. Trying to avoid feelings of sadness and loss only prolongs the grieving process. Unresolved grief can also lead to complications such as depression, anxiety, substance abuse, and health problems. Express your feelings in a tangible or creative way. Write about your loss in a journal. If you’ve lost a loved one, write a letter saying the things you never got to say; make a scrapbook or photo album celebrating the person’s life; or get involved in a cause or organization that was important to him or her. Look after your physical health. The mind and body are connected. When you feel good physically, you’ll also feel better emotionally. Combat stress and fatigue by getting enough sleep, eating right, and exercising. Don’t use alcohol or drugs to numb the pain of grief or lift your mood artificially. Don’t let anyone tell you how to feel, and don’t tell yourself how to feel either. Your grief is your own, and no one else can tell you when it’s time to “move on” or “get over it.” Let yourself feel whatever you feel without embarrassment or judgment. It’s okay to be angry, to yell at the heavens, to cry or not to cry. It’s also okay to laugh, to find moments of joy, and to let go when you’re ready. Plan ahead for grief “triggers.” Anniversaries, holidays, and milestones can reawaken memories and feelings. Be prepared for an emotional wallop, and know that it’s completely normal. If you’re sharing a holiday or lifecycle event with other relatives, talk to them ahead of time about their expectations and agree on strategies to honor the person you loved. Using social media for support Memorial pages on Facebook and other social media sites have become popular ways to inform a wide audience of a loved one’s passing and to reach out for support. As well as allowing you to impart practical information, such as funeral plans, these pages allow friends and loved ones to post their own tributes or condolences. Reading such messages can often provide some comfort for those grieving the loss. Of course, posting sensitive content on social media has its risks as well. Memorial pages are often open to anyone with a Facebook account. This may encourage people who hardly knew the deceased to post well-meaning but inappropriate comments or advice. Worse, memorial pages can also attract internet trolls. There have been many well-publicized cases of strangers posting cruel or abusive messages on Facebook memorial pages. To gain some protection, you can opt to create a closed group on Facebook rather than a public page, which means people have to be approved by a group member before they can access the memorial. It’s also important to remember that while social media can be a useful tool for reaching out to others, it can’t replace the face-to-face connection and support you need at this time. When grief doesn’t go away It’s normal to feel sad, numb, or angry following a loss. But as time passes, these emotions should become less intense as you accept the loss and start to move forward. If you aren’t feeling better over time, or your grief is getting worse, it may be a sign that your grief has developed into a more serious problem, such as complicated grief or major depression. Complicated grief The sadness of losing someone you love never goes away completely, but it shouldn’t remain center stage. If the pain of the loss is so constant and severe that it keeps you from resuming your life, you may be suffering from a condition known as complicated grief. Complicated grief is like being stuck in an intense state of mourning. You may have trouble accepting the death long after it has occurred or be so preoccupied with the person who died that it disrupts your daily routine and undermines your other relationships. Symptoms of complicated grief include: Intense longing and yearning for the deceased Intrusive thoughts or images of your loved one Denial of the death or sense of disbelief Imagining that your loved one is alive Searching for the person in familiar places Avoiding things that remind you of your loved one Extreme anger or bitterness over the loss Feeling that life is empty or meaningless The difference between grief and depression Distinguishing between grief and clinical depression isn’t always easy as they share many symptoms, but there are ways to tell the difference. Remember, grief can be a roller coaster. It involves a wide variety of emotions and a mix of good and bad days. Even when you’re in the middle of the grieving process, you will have moments of pleasure or happiness. With depression, on the other hand, the feelings of emptiness and despair are constant. Other symptoms that suggest depression, not just grief: Intense, pervasive sense of guilt Thoughts of suicide or a preoccupation with dying Feelings of hopelessness or worthlessness Slow speech and body movements Inability to function at work, home, and/or school Seeing or hearing things that aren’t there Can antidepressants help grief? As a general rule, normal grief does not warrant the use of antidepressants. While medication may relieve some of the symptoms of grief, it cannot treat the cause, which is the loss itself. Furthermore, by numbing the pain that must be worked through eventually, antidepressants delay the mourning process. When to seek professional help for grief If you recognize any of the above symptoms of complicated grief or clinical depression, talk to a mental health professional right away. Left untreated, complicated grief and depression can lead to significant emotional damage, life-threatening health problems, and even suicide. But treatment can help you get better. Contact a grief counselor or professional therapist if you: Feel like life isn’t worth living Wish you had died with your loved one Blame yourself for the loss or for failing to prevent it Feel numb and disconnected from others for more than a few weeks Are having difficulty trusting others since your loss Are unable to perform your normal daily activities I hope this helps.
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I am depressed from study and memory loss also please answer me that how to recover my memory and suitable food and exercise also.

BASM, MD, MS (Counseling & Psychotherapy), MSc - Psychology, Certificate in Clinical psychology of children and Young People, Certificate in Psychological First Aid, Certificate in Positive Psychology
Psychologist, Palakkad
I am depressed from study and memory loss also please answer me that how to recover my memory and suitable food and e...
Dear lybrate user, welcome to lybrate. Memory and mind power depends mainly on three aspects. Understanding, storage and recollection. To understand what you are studying, you must be able to be attentive or concentrate. Concentration is possible when you are interested in that subject. Creative way of learning can help you concentrate and understand easily. When you are able to understand and concentrate, it is stored within your brain. If you read more and more it will be store in long term memory. Third part is retrieval. Whenever you want to retrive what you learned and stored, your brain gets the request, searches the database and retrieves the information for you. The retrieval may prove to be difficult if you are anxious, stressed, worried or tired physically or mentally. Retrieval is more easy when you are relaxed and healthy. Brain needs nutrients to keep itself sharp. Fruits, vegetables and dry fruits provide much needed nutrients for your brain. Include at least one fruit in your daily diet. Physical exercises, entertainment, hobbies, relaxation, memory games like sudoku etc help keep your memory sharp and active. Take care.
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My mind forces me to take anxiety and stress. That's good for my health. I know I'm getting anxious unnecessarily. If I gain a little weight, an anxious thought is coming to my mind whether I will get any health problem like heart problem even though I'm underweight. Weight- 51, height-175 cm, age- 29. While becoming anxious, I can feel I'm losing immunity power. Pls advise me . I need to gain weight up to 75 kg gradually corresponding to my height.

L L. B..,, M.Sc psychy,, N L P, P.G.D.G.C, M.S psychotherapy,, M.A child care, M A, clinical psy, M.A,social psychiatry,, M.Phil., psychology., Ph.D .,psychology
Psychologist, Vijayawada
My mind forces me to take anxiety and stress. That's good for my health. I know I'm getting anxious unnecessarily. If...
Why wantedly go to anxious status then suffers yourself. You mind forces then you stop. It may cause so many defects. It spoils mood and personal disturbances also. Everything in your hands. Please take further steps to overcome from this status. Continues anxious may cause so many problems. Feelling weightless it is also psychological feeling. When you are always in anxious status. Everything looks like doubt. So do not be anxious. Feel always better. Do not think unnecessary problems. Take good food it may helps to overwwieght. It will happen what you need. Everything in your hand. So please feel happy and be friendly. Best wishes.
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I have recently broke up with my girlfriend. I can't focus on my studies and anything. I feel so depressed and don't know what to do. I want to be normal like before and my exams are nearing. Pls help me to focus on my studies rather than thinking about her and go miserable.

BDS, Certification in hypnotherapy, Certification in N.L.P, Certification in Gene and behavior, Psychology at Work
Psychologist, Gurgaon
I have recently broke up with my girlfriend. I can't focus on my studies and anything. I feel so depressed and don't ...
Initial time after a break-up may be taxing , But it gradually fades. Do one n.l.p exercise collect some incidents with her of past which were hurtful and bitter. line them in a sequence and play a movie inside you, repeat it for 3-4 times in one go and feel relieved at the end. do it for few days and u will get over it soon
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Hi I am 20 year old and I have problem of Drinking. I am not live without drinking.

Reparenting Technique, BA, BEd
Psychologist, Bangalore
You are too young to be unable to live without drinking alcohol. If you are that addicted, you must look at whether you have a genetic factor, an oral issue, a rigid value system and also a script issue. These, either alone or in combination of two or three or all four make you an addictive personality. Of course there is the issue of dependence and tolerance that would have developed with the effect of the chemical. Since you are a teenager, there is still a lot of neurons that are still forming and establishing itself. Drinking during your teens, will permanently damage those nerves and affect decision making, taking responsibility and memory. Every time you drink heavily, you damage thousands of brain cells, never to be replaced. So the choice is very clear: quit right now through some treatment, and later when you have better controls you may choose to drink socially, other factors being normal. You have two choices in treatment: admit yourself into a hospital for detoxification over a two-week period to remove the physical craving and follow that up with counseling. The other option is to go for rehabilitation to a recovery center and stay there for 6 months and go through the 12-step process and work on the many issues that usually trouble the addict. After both these options, it is highly recommended to attend the aa meetings to get the best kind of support ever experienced for recovered alcoholics. Private counseling can continue in conjunction with the recovery and it must last for at least 3 complete years of total abstinence, if you are to truly consider yourself to be clean off of this habit.
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Today was my practicals. It was very tough and I couldn't do it as I wished. I feel bad and today is not my day.

BASM, MD, MS (Counseling & Psychotherapy), MSc - Psychology, Certificate in Clinical psychology of children and Young People, Certificate in Psychological First Aid, Certificate in Positive Psychology
Psychologist, Palakkad
Today was my practicals. It was very tough and I couldn't do it as I wished. I feel bad and today is not my day.
Dear. You did not do the practicals as best as you thought. But it was ok. You did your best. Stop worrying. Now worrying is of no use. What happened is happened. Just rejoice. Take care.
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