Dr. Sayeed Khan

Satisfaction in every relation is very important. However, there are times, when due to certain factors or conditions most of us fail to achieve it. Two things that most men are generally insecure about are sex and the size of their penis. They are always concerned if their penis size is above average and their performance in bed is good. Although the size of their penis, is not in their control, they can definitely make a positive difference in bed, by holding ejaculation for a longer period of time. 

A recent research had revealed that 45% of men last for a less period of time, that is, only about 2 minutes. This statistic may be quite disappointing, but when it comes to lasting longer in bed, the situation can be improved by following some useful tips.

Here are 3 ways in which you can last longer in bed, and make your sex life more fulfilling: 

1. The stop-start technique: This technique is quite useful and has great results. When you start getting stimulated and reach the point of your arousal where you cannot hold on any longer- stop. Stop for about 10 seconds and allow your arousal to subside. Continue to do this for a few times, and then release. 
2. The squeeze technique: Research has shown that in case you are close to ejaculation, stop and gently squeeze just below the penis head. The pressure is aimed towards the urethra and it helps in repressing your ejaculation. 
3. Use desensitizing rubbers: A very effective way to hold back your ejaculation is by wearing desensitizing condoms. These condoms feature a desensitizing lubricant known as benzocaine. But while using a condom, make sure you put it on the right side up or the lubricant will end up affecting your partner's vagina, making sex more difficult.

These techniques are better as during the sex we do not remember everything. When we are going for sex, first of all, we should be stress-free; second, should not have heavy food and mind make up for sex with a partner. Take one glass warm and sweet milk with some dry fruits before two hours from sex. Avoid tea coffee and sore foods. These things make better our sex life.milk 

Certain lifestyle changes have also been found to help improve your sex life. For instance, a vegetarian diet and pelvic exercises make you stronger and better in bed. If you wish to discuss about any specific problem, you can consult a sexologist.

It is important that you protect yourself from various types of diseases and infections as much as possible. Female condoms are used to have protected intercourse so as to avoid contact with ejaculatory fluids. These condoms help a person to steer clear of blood, semen and vaginal fluids as well. Female condoms fall under the category of barrier contraceptives. They are considered to be less effective in comparison to male condoms, but are nonetheless good for preventing any kind of infection. Ensuring fine health through safe sex is your due responsibility. Hence, a little knowledge about these contraceptives is helpful if you wish to shun chances of unwanted pregnancy or Sexually Transmitted Diseases. 

What is it like?
A female condom looks like an ill  fitting hollow cylinder. It is a thin sheath with a closed end, that goes inside the vagina and an open end that remains outside the vagina covering other external, genital parts. The covered end has to be inserted into the vagina or into the anus. It is a misconception, that female condoms can only be used by females. It is predominantly used by females, but can also be used by any receptive partner during sexual intercourse. The ends have circular rings to keep the condom in place. 

What are they made of? 
Femidoms are usually made up of polyurethane. This material is expensive, making the product costly. The need for a cost effective product was immediately felt to encourage the use of condoms among females. Thus, the next generation of female condoms were made with synthetic Nitrile. Nitrile proved to be a competent substitute as it did away with the annoying noises polyurethane made during sex. It also reduced condom pricing considerably. Researchers have also come up with natural latex female condoms that retain the feel of a male condom. 

Benefits of using a female condom
It is a great barrier in thwarting the flow of semen into the womb. Thus, they reduce the risk of accidental pregnancy. It also protects you against sexually transmitted infections like gonorrhoea, Syphilis, and HIV. Sex partners should be careful to refrain from any sexual contact before the insertion of a female condom. Only after the condom has been placed properly, the penis should enter the vagina or the anus. Femidoms are available in varied sizes, but the average sized condom fits most females. Large sized condoms can be used by new mothers. It is advised to buy condoms that bear the CE mark on them. The CE mark represents European Safety Standards and thus, leaves you least vulnerable to accidents or diseases. If you wish to discuss about any specific problem, you can consult a doctor.

A healthy physical relationship is not only stimulating, but it also enhances your emotional bonding with your partner and reduces stress in both partners. However, statistics report that almost 30% of the women experience pain during intercourse. This not only hampers the pleasure, but is also an unhealthy sign since it is indicative of a problem.

Painful intercourse could be a regular occurrence, or a sporadic one. There could be numerous reasons that cause the discomfort and pain. Though it might be an early manifestation of grave diseases such as endometriosis or fibroids, but more often, it is triggered due to conditions such as vaginal dryness, yeast infection, bacterial vaginiosis, which can be easily treated. It is pertinent to understand that it is not the physical infirmity of the entire female anatomy that causes such pain/ discomfort, but the existence of certain conditions that can be treated by a medical practitioner.

Certain such causal factors associated with painful intercourse and the efficient ways to deal with them are discussed below:

1. Vaginal dryness - Vaginal dryness is one of the most commonly cited causes for painful intercourse. There are various causal factors of vaginal dryness. These include, but are not limited to, consumption of certain drugs, bathing with hot water, health conditions or even lack of foreplay. Vaginal dryness due to the aforementioned causes is a short-lived condition that can be treated well with the help of a medical practitioner.
Usage of lubricants that is suitable for you, as advised by a medical practitioner, could go a long way in aiding the ease of sexual intercourse. The lubricants act as an effective substitute, if the body is unable to naturally secrete vaginal fluids to ease intercourse, thereby greatly reducing the pain that is experienced.

2. Improper vaginal expansion - The female anatomy is designed in such a way that it expands normally during intercourse. Proper foreplay enables the woman to get excited, which results in the release of vaginal fluids that aids in sexual intercourse. However, in the event that the female is not excited enough prior to the act, sexual intercourse can become a painful act, since the vagina is unable to expand in the absence of vaginal fluids. In such cases, take things slow and give your body time to comfortably go with the flow.

3. Vaginal itching caused by infection - Vaginal infections can be caused by antibiotics, prior sexual activity that has resulted in contraction of Sexually Transmitted Diseases etc. This results in an itching or burning sensation while having sex. It is essential to rest your body instead of forcing things, and to consult your doctor as soon as possible. The doctor can correctly diagnose the causal factors behind the infection, and prescribe the necessary medicines for it.

However, if your symptoms vary from the common ones mentioned above, or in case you have a different query, it is always advisable to consult the doctor.

As time progresses in a relationship, the sizzle somehow fizzles out and does not bring the same excitement as it used to.  However, sex is one of the best ways to keep the relationship lively and young.  Despite the hectic lifestyle and the weariness that sets in, there are definitely some simple things that can add some spice to your life and pump a new lease of life into the relationship.  What was initially spontaneous needs some forceful trying with time. 

Listed below are some tips that can help you sizzle up your sex life.

1. Simple touch: Remember that sex need not happen in the bedroom when the lights are off. Routine, regular touch, which could include holding hands and a peck on the cheek can help keep the interest alive.  Make it a routine to do this every day, at a chosen time of the day.
2. Fix up a date: Even if it sounds forced, block one day of the week as your date day.  If possible, go out for a dinner which will bring a change of place. Cook some aphrodisiac foods like onion, celery, asparagus could add to the magic. 
3. Go lingerie shopping together: This could be one nice way to rekindle interest and along the way, you might end up with some nice fancy stuff.
4. Watch adult movies together: This definitely will bring you in the mood.  If you are both game, then you could watch something different and even end up trying.  It has been proven that a person's preferences in bed change with time, and the new positions and forms might bring back the eagerness to indulge in the act more often.
5. Try different place, different time: This could be something like spending time in the shower together, or in the pool, or even spending a night in a hotel for a change.  The routine home environment sometimes just sucks away the energy and mood required for sex.
6. Frank discussion: As much as it might seem difficult, try having a frank discussion with your partner about how they feel about sex - would they like to turn anything, why there is less of it in general, etc.
7. Work out: Exercise to show that you are interested in keeping yourself in shape and healthy.  This definitely will kindle interest in the other person.
8. Read about sex: There are some sex facts including how it helps in curing headache, is the best cure for cold, is more effective than half an hour of running, frequent ejaculations reduce chances or prostate cancer, etc.

And these are some sure ways to improve your sex life.

Compelling urge to get physical with your partner that is an aberration from what is expected of a person, that is to say usual genital arousal for a phenotypically normal, physically of age and consenting human counterpart, is referred to as Paraphilia or sexual perversion. This condition lives up to the standards of a disabling problem when it hampers the overall health of a person, leads to psychological setback or victimization of another individual (read more for healthy sexual life).
 
Psychological impacts of going through such a condition

1. The perpetrator of the variation may or may not see this as a condition: The person suffering from this condition may or may not treat it as a problem. In both ways, it is harmful. Knowing it as a problem and not seeking treatment or assistance can be harmful for oneself and others. Not realizing that you are subject to a serious sexual condition might propel you to commit wrong to non- consensual partners while being confident about your ways.
    
2. Social ostracization kills them: Coming in the open with a sexual fantasy that is not acceptable to the society can leave you with varied reactions. People might be incited to attack you for being unusual or they might isolate you. The latter is a probable outcome. Rarely does society guide you towards betterment in such cases. Social ostracization can result in deep rooted hatred for the world at large. 
  
3. Perpetual humiliation can push them more into Paraphilia: Humiliation for being different from the rest can make a person feel shame. Shame and constant regret cannot help an instance of sexual perversion. It can make a man or woman more obstinate. In such a situation a person would strongly cling to his or her condition feeling extremely dejected.

    
4. 'To be or not to be' haunts people suffering from Paraphilia: Many times a sufferer is not able to understand what is wrong in having objectionable sexual behavioral tendencies and fantasies. As long as your fantasies are limited to your own mental domain or are performed on a consensual partner, there are no complications. The minute an obnoxious sexual urge is performed leading to personal or public harm, a threatening hitch arises. 

5. Problems in expressing oneself can make a person suicidal: To adhere to societal norms a person might keep his desires on a leash. This kind of compromising over a long span of time will make a person depressive and may also prompt him to commit suicide.

If you wish to discuss about any specific problem, you can consult the doctor and ask a free question.

One of the most common queries faced by doctors dealing with pregnancies are risks associated with having sex during the gestation and post-partum periods. Such doubts arise from both genuine concern and also from several superstitions and myths.

As a matter of fact, having sex during pregnancy is perfectly normal and safe. However, keeping in mind the changes the woman is going through, there are a few specific do's and don'ts you need to follow while having sex during pregnancy.

Do's

1. Be aware: Pay attention to the doctor's evaluation of the expecting mother's condition. Many pregnancy risks can be predicted at an early stage. Abstain in case of predictions pointing to a risky gestation period and/ or delivery. Get yourself tested regularly, so that there is no possibility of transmitting infections to the expecting mother.
2. Enjoy foreplay: Pregnancy normally results in increased sensation in the erotogenic zones. Foreplay is a great way to relieve a woman's tension and she will enjoy your touch more than ever.
3. Pay attention to your partner's needs and reactions: Women have to go through a lot during pregnancy like fatigue all the time, along with sudden nausea and extreme mood swings. So, paying more attention to your partner's needs and reactions will help make the act more enjoyable for both of you.

Don'ts

1. Don't go for multiple partners: Multiple partners increase the risk of infections. It is not advisable to have sex with multiple partners during this time.
2. Don't Use sex toys: Use of sex toys during pregnancy is discouraged as it increases the risk of infections.
3. Don't Try risky positions and maneuvers: Please keep your desires for exotic positions in check. Risque behavior can lead to injuries.
4. Don't Keep yourself ahead of her: It is perfect idiocy to keep your desires ahead of the needs and desires of the love of your life. By putting yourself ahead of her you will not only negatively affect her mental health, but her physical health as well.
5. Do not mix drugs with intimacy: Use of intoxicants during her pregnancy to enhance your senses will put the healthy growth and delivery of the child in jeopardy. A number of birth defects in children are the result of using intoxicating substance use during pregnancy.