Lybrate Mini logo
Lybrate for
Android icon App store icon
Ask FREE Question Ask FREE Question to Health Experts
Common Specialities
{{speciality.keyWord}}
Common Issues
{{issue.keyWord}}
Common Treatments
{{treatment.keyWord}}

Dr. Vinayak Vijayakumar

Psychiatrist, Chennai

Dr. Vinayak Vijayakumar Psychiatrist, Chennai
₹ online
Submit Feedback
Report Issue
Get Help
Feed

Personal Statement

My experience is coupled with genuine concern for my patients. All of my staff is dedicated to your comfort and prompt attention as well....more
My experience is coupled with genuine concern for my patients. All of my staff is dedicated to your comfort and prompt attention as well.
More about Dr. Vinayak Vijayakumar
Dr. Vinayak Vijayakumar is an experienced Psychiatrist in Mylapore, Chennai. You can visit him at Dr.Vijayakumar's Clinic in Mylapore, Chennai. You can book an instant appointment online with Dr. Vinayak Vijayakumar on Lybrate.com.

Lybrate.com has an excellent community of Psychiatrists in India. You will find Psychiatrists with more than 42 years of experience on Lybrate.com. You can find Psychiatrists online in Chennai and from across India. View the profile of medical specialists and their reviews from other patients to make an informed decision.

Info

Specialty
Languages spoken
English

Location

Book Clinic Appointment

No.7, Lalitha Nagar, Papanasam Sivam Road 1st Street, Mylapore. Landmark: Near Rosary Matriculation, ChennaiChennai Get Directions
...more
View All

Consult Online

Text Consult
Send multiple messages/attachments
7 days validity
Consult Now

Feed

Nothing posted by this doctor yet. Here are some posts by similar doctors.

I cannot concentrate in anything. There is something inside making irritable. I cannot pay attention to my study also. I smoke sometimes and beer as well. Is smoke and beer are the reason for that Can you help me in this matter.

MBBS, MD Psychiatry, DNB Psychiatry
Psychiatrist
Ask Free Question
I cannot concentrate in anything. There is something inside making irritable. I cannot pay attention to my study also...
Inability to concentrate and easy irritability can be signs of underlying unresolved stress and anxiety. Increase in smoking and alcohol is also suggestive of inner stress. Try to find time fir relaxation. Do exercises like yoga and meditation for relaxation. In case you still find it difficult do not hesitate to consult a psychiatrist. In case of any queries and assistance with treatment required, you may consult me online.

Whenever I sit down to study, going well for sometime I want to relax and don't have full concentration on studies. How to increase concentration?

BASM, MD, MS (Counseling & Psychotherapy), MSc - Psychology, Certificate in Clinical psychology of children and Young People, Certificate in Psychological First Aid, Certificate in Positive Psychology
Psychologist
Ask Free Question
Dear lybrate-user, welcome to lybrate. You must be able to understand concentration, attention span, recollection and distraction. If you are able to watch a movie for two hours continuously, if you are able to play a game for an hour, then you do not have any concentration problems. You can't be attentive towards your studies because you are not interested in it. You are able to watch movie and play game because you are interested in it. Human cannot be attentive towards anything for more than 10 minutes. If the task is boring, it is natural that that person will sleep or feel sleepy. Then you should study in such a way that your attention is continued and make the subjects are interesting to you. Effective learning techniques should help you. Recollection depends on anxiety, stress and other physical and circumstantial factors. Distractions while studying are plentiful. You should be able to overcome distractions or avoid distractions. Please understand the above. Change your study style and attitude accordingly.
1 person found this helpful

Hello Dr. I am 30 years old, m suffering from depression, sadness, even at this time m crying while typing. Have taken clonazepam and escitalopram for more than 1 year. I have a type relation with someone which is not fulfilling my demands and m not satisfied, we are very good friends, all the time I think about her, want her as if we had not a talk for few hours problem in breathing starts, I feel heavy weight on chest, I masturbate 3 times a day thinking of her, but from last three days I dint, nd feeling very low. Please help me. At this time I am wanting to be admitted in some hospital and give me some injections to sleep for few days continuous. My morning starts with checking her messages. All the day I wait for her calls and msgs. Please help.

Reparenting Technique, BA, BEd
Psychologist
Ask Free Question
Hello Dr. I am 30 years old, m suffering from depression, sadness, even at this time m crying while typing. Have take...
I think that you have become addicted to her. This is not good for any relationship not for your mental wellbeing. Am I to assume that the depression is a result of the poor relationship or is it due to some other factors? If this is a one-sided relationship that too is not healthy and can never materialize. Ideally you should get out of this relationship and I see many of your problems resolved to your advantage. Meet a counselor soon and get that person’s guidance to get out of this relationship soon. For the depression please do the following: Have a good night’s sleep, have a good breakfast of more proteins, meditate often, remain free of stress, eat a lot of fiber, nuts, avocado, exercise regularly, eat dark chocolate, do Yoga meditation exercises, etc. I suggest you do the opposite of what this depression makes you feel like doing (actually, not doing): you will need to fight this condition. You must become active; stay upright during the daylight time; meet people; never sleep during the day, wake up by 6 am every day, play some active games, especially contact games, do physical exercises, talk to people and join some social clubs, attend Yoga classes etc. Watch sitcoms on TV or comedies and cheer yourself up. Go for excursions in groups, for outings, camps, conferences, and religious conventions. Get a pet dog and spend time training it, exercising it and relating to it. Expose yourself to some sunlight every day, at least 30 minutes but not in the scotching heat. Whatever happens, please incorporate these three important adaptations in your life: always be responsible, be respectful, and be functional. If you did these three, lots of things will go well in life. Please pray and have faith in God to alleviate your sufferings. Don’t wait for others to help. Use your own motivation, which might be at its lowest, but persevere and win this battle. Above all to be really happy, you need to live in love and for love: find someone else to love and to love you back. A counselor is there only to facilitate you, all the hard word must come from you, and your cooperation with that person is very critical for your success. Be positive everyday and learn to be contended with what you have. Do some left brain exercises: it is the happy brain. Here are a few suggestions: shut your left nostril and breathe, move your eyes from right to left and vice versa for at least half a minute at a time, and do callisthenic exercises with some form of counting, regularly.
74 people found this helpful

I always use to chew pan masala. Some times in parties I used to drink alcohol. Now the problem is I am suffering from acidity some burning sensation in stomach and chest from many years (7_8). Tell me some medicines to fast and complete overcome by this problem.

Ask Free Question
I always use to chew pan masala. Some times in parties I used to drink alcohol. Now the problem is I am suffering fro...
Take nux vom 30 /tds /7 days and arena sativa q /20 drops / tds in some water try to quit pan and alcohol while on medication.
5 people found this helpful

I want to left smoking bt can not do that. Daily I smoke 5-6 cigrate. How to control on this. Could you please give a suggestion for this. And from lst 6 years m smoking cigrate.

BASM, MD, MS (Counseling & Psychotherapy), MSc - Psychology, Certificate in Clinical psychology of children and Young People, Certificate in Psychological First Aid, Certificate in Positive Psychology
Psychologist
Ask Free Question
Dear Lybrate user. Tobacco is addictive. Cigarette also contains 4000+ carcinogenic chemicals other than nicotine. The best method is to leave it and continue with your will power. There are other methods like Nicotine Replacement therapy and pharmacotherapy combined. But still you will need will power. You may consult a physician or deaddiction therapist or a rehabilitation facility for further advise. Take care.

I am feeling depression kisi se baat krne ka dil nai krta Gussa 15 min ka bhaut jayada aata hai husband k sath fights raheti hai marriage ko Nov mein 2 years complete Ho jaenge life se satisfies nai Hu husband sex satisfaction nd financial nd support nd soft talking nai hai isi vajah se chichira pan raheta hai or useless baato pe fights hoti hoti.

psychologist
Psychologist
Ask Free Question
Dear Lybrate user lybrate-user ,Ek baat aapko samajhni padegi ki Sabka nature different hota hai aur koi is world me perfect nahi hota kisi ke sath kuch problem hoti hai kisi ke sath kuch ,kitne husband apni wife ko physical torture bhi karte hai, cheat bhi karte hai but is point pe aap lucky ho. Iska ye matlab nahi ki is situation ko badla nahi ja sakta aur isko aap hi badal sakti ho ,aapko thoda samajhdari se kaam Lena hoga ,it's obvious humari apne life partner se kuch umeed hoti hai but life me sab kuch apne hisab se kisi ke sath nahi hota .Iska sabse achcha Rasta hai ki aap apne husband se baat karo aur samjhao ki jo hua us ko yahi pe full stop laga ke aap sab kuch naye Tarah se start krna chahti hai aur aap dono ko sath rahna hai to ye jaroori hai ki sab kuch restart kiya jaye achche se. I am sure wo bhi sab kuch normal karna chahte honge, koi apni life stressfull nahi banana chahta hai. Aapko Jab bhi gussa aaye kisi ko call Karke turant sab kuch share karo aur jo baat irritate kar rahi hai sab bata do. Iske regarding aap kisi counsellor ki help le sakte ho. Aap chaho to mujhse bhi online help le sakte ho. Take care.
1 person found this helpful

I feel excited n can't control when I saw the beautiful aunties and girls I want to fuck them but how l can controlled myself?

DHMS (Diploma in Homeopathic Medicine and Surgery)
Homeopath
Ask Free Question
I feel excited n can't control when I saw the beautiful aunties and  girls I want to fuck them but how l can controll...
Sex is interesting and wonderful, when done with the right person and at right age; but until then, it is necessary to keep our desires in check. You have full life ahead for sex after marriage but only next 5-7 years to shape up years carrie In order to control your urge for sex, these are some of the things you can do: To curb your sexual desires, you have to do more to think less. Channel all those feelings into something that will keep your mind off sex and then, get busy. You can read books, go out with friends, watch movies, learn new things etc. Transfer your urges into something you have always wanted to do. At the end of the day, you would have successfully managed not to think about sex and you will also be satisfied at the things you did. If one of those hobbies trigger a sexual response in you and you are feeling aroused, do not masturbate. Think of non-sexual images or take a long walk Engage your body in exercise that will keep you busy and keep you from feeling frustrated from not having sex. You can jog in the morning, swim or hit the gym. You can also try yoga and other exercise that will help stimulate both mind and body. In order to control your sexual urge, you should enter into a relationship with no sex. If you wonder what you both will do without the sex, there are countless things couples can do to bond like going on a field trip together, taking up a joint hobby, learning new things together. Far from what most people think, you can have a very satisfying relationship without sex If you feel like you can’t control it all by yourself, you can talk to your doctor, pastor, parents, close relative or friends. Sometimes, having someone to talk to about how you feel helps better than trying to curb it all by yourself. Who knows, the person you want to meet may have had difficulty curbing his own desires too. What then is better than learning from someone’s experience. Don’t be shy or scared of being judged.- Get spiritual help that engages your mind in spiritual activities that are far from sex. Being around people pursuing the same goal as you, especially in chastity can also be a strong supportive measure. That way you have someone holding your hands all the way. Trying doing BRAMARI PRANAYAM for 10-15 minutes in morning for Mind control.

What is the medicine for very early stage of Parkinson's disease.

MD - Psychiatry, MBBS
Psychiatrist
Ask Free Question
i dopa, carbidopa and trihexyphenidyl are few medicines that can be used in initial stage. But you should not self medicate and consult a neurologist. He may advise you the correct dose schedule after assessing severity of your symptoms. I wish you all the best.
1 person found this helpful

My memory power is weak. Class topic I have to remember. And my friends learn in class only. How to improve it.

C.S.C, D.C.H, M.B.B.S
General Physician
Ask Free Question
10 Study Tips to Improve Your Learning Study Tip 1: Underlining Underlining is one of the simplest and best known study tips. It’s easy to highlight the most significant parts of what you’re reading. One key sentence per paragraph and a few important phrases here and there. You can only retain a certain amount so it’s best to retain the most important information. Study Tip 2: Make your own note and taking notes is one of the most widespread study skills out there. Essentially the aim of note-taking is to summarise lectures or articles in your own words so you can easily remember the ideas. Study Tip 3: Mind mapping A good Mind map can save you many hours of study and further consolidate your knowledge for your exams. Mind Maps are an extremely versatile tools. They can be used for brainstorming, outlining essays or study topics and for general exam preparation, ExamTime offers the ability to create Mind Maps quickly and easily which makes them the ideal tool when it comes to exams. Study Tip 4: Flash cards:- Using these are a particularly effective method of learning when trying to assimilate different facts, dates, formulas or vocabulary. Subjects such as History, Physics, Maths, Chemistry, Geography or any language are made much easier if you incorporate Flashcards in to your study. Study Tip 5: Case Studies Sometimes it can be difficult to grasp the implications of some theories. This is where studying case studies can be a big help. Case studies can help you visualise a theory and place it in a more familiar and realistic context. This is especially useful in business or law subjects. Study Tip 6: Quizzes are an excellent way to review study notes in the weeks and days before an exam. Quizzes can show where your strengths and weaknesses are, so it allows you to focus your efforts more precisely. Moreover, if you share your Study Quiz with your classmates and test each other as much as possible you can discover even more details and areas you may have overlooked. So before any exam, make sure you create and share a bunch of different Quizzes with your Friends. Study Tip 7: Brainstorming This is another study technique that is ideal for studying with friends and/or classmates. Brainstorming is a great way to expand every possible idea out of any topic. Just get a bunch of friends together and shoot the breeze, there are no wrong answers when brainstorming – just talk and capture the ideas, you can review afterward. Study Tip 8: Mnemonic Rules Mnemonics are especially useful when memorising lists and sets. Mnemonics rules basically work by associating certain concepts with other concepts that are more familiar to us. There are many different ways to make mnemonics and these can be individual to the person. Study Tip 9: ORGANISE your study One of the most effective study skills is also one of the most often overlooked; this is organising your study. Creating a TIME TABLE gives you goals and a time in which to achieve them. Having a study timetable as you study is greatly motivational Study Tip 10: Drawing Many people find it easier to recall images rather than text that is why they are better able to memorise concepts if they associate them with pictures or drawings. If you find answer helpful please click on “helpful” tab for knowing my efforts are useful
1 person found this helpful

I forgot everything which I read, so can you give me some suggestion to get out of this? Please help me.

C.S.C, D.C.H, M.B.B.S
General Physician
Ask Free Question
1. 7 Lifestyle-Based Ways to Improve Your Memory 1. Eat Right. The foods you eat ? and don't eat ? play a crucial role in your memory. ... 2. Exercise. ... 3. Stop Multitasking. ... 4. Get a Good Night's Sleep. ... 5. Play Brain Games. ... 6. Master a New Skill. ... 7. Try Mnemonic Devices. There are mind training and some memory boosting medicines also. Ask me privately. Eight Ways to Remember Anything Research-based strategies to boost your memory and keep it strong 8 Strategies for Remembering 1. Become interested in what you're learning. We're all better remembering what interests us. Few people, for example, have a difficult time remembering the names of people they find attractive. If you're not intrinsically interested in what you're learning or trying to remember, you must find a way to become so. 2. Find a way to leverage your visual(link is external) memory. You'll be astounded by how much more this will enable you to remember. For example, imagine you're at a party and are introduced to five people in quick succession. How can you quickly memorize their names? Pick out a single defining visual characteristic of each person and connect it to a visual representation of their name, preferably through an action of some kind. For example, you can remember Mike who has large ears by creating a mental picture of a microphone (a "mike") clearing those big ears of wax (gross, I know?but all the more effective because of it). It requires mental effort to do this, but if you practice you'll be surprised how quickly you can come up with creative ways to generate these images. Here's another example: How often do you forget where you left your keys, your sunglasses, or your wallet? The next time you put something down somewhere, pause a moment to notice where you've placed it, and then in your mind blow it up. If you visualize the explosion in enough detail, you won't forget where you put it. Remember: Memory is predominantly visual. 3. Create a mental memory tree. If you're trying to memorize a large number of facts, find a way to relate them in your mind visually with a memory tree. Construct big branches first, then leaves. Branches and leaves should carry labels that are personally meaningful to you in some way, and the organization of the facts ("leaves") should be logical. It's been well recognized since the 1950's we remember "bits" of information better if we chunk them. For example, it's easier to remember 467890 as "467" and "890" than as six individual digits. 4. Associate what you're trying to learn with what you already know. It seems the more mental connections we have to a piece of information, the more successful we'll be in remembering it. This is why using mnemonics. Write out the items to be memorized over and over and over. Among other things, this is how I learned the names of bacteria, what infections they cause, and what antibiotics treat them. Writing out facts(link is external) in lists improves recall if you make yourself learn the lists actively instead of passively. In other words, don't just copy the list of facts you're trying to learn but actively recall each item you wish to learn and then write it down again and again and again. In doing this, you are, in effect, teaching yourself what you're trying to learn?and as all teachers know, the best way to ensure you know something is to have to teach it. This method has the added benefit of immediately showing you exactly which facts haven't made it into your long-term memory so you can focus more attention on learning them rather than wasting time reinforcing facts you already know. 5. When reading for retention, summarize each paragraph in the margin. This requires you to think about what you're reading, recycle it, and teach it to yourself again. Even take the concepts you're learning and reason forward with them; apply them to imagined novel situations, which creates more neural connections to reinforce the memory. 6. Do most of your studying in the afternoon. Though you may identify yourself as a "morning person" or "evening person" at least one Study. suggests your ability to memorize isn't influenced as much by what time of day you perceive yourself to be most alert but by the time of day you actually study?afternoon appearing to be the best. 7. Get adequate sleep to consolidate and retain memories. Not just at night(link is external) after you've studied but the day before(link is external) you study as well. Far better to do this than to stay up cramming all night for an exam.

My old aged father is suffering from depression. He is always thinking negative. Always there's fear on his face. He is scared to go out. Please suggest.

DNB (Psychiatry), DPM, MBBS
Psychiatrist
Ask Free Question
My old aged father is suffering from depression. He is always thinking negative. Always there's fear on his face. He ...
Geriatric depression is often wrongly taken as to aging and its consequences. The changed role of life and being physically and psychologically dependent makes them elders vulnerable. Presence of medical or surgical illnesses further complicates the diagnosis. Please take him to a psychiatrist for proper evaluation. Do not take his complaints for granted and try to involve him in some daily activity which will give him entitlement and purpose.
1 person found this helpful

I am suffering from epilepsy from 4.5 years. And I am taking medicine regularly as per doctor advise. Can I stop it now if I feeling good with out advise of doctor?

MBBS
General Physician
Ask Free Question
No you should not stop it without consulting the doctor you will be required to undergo some investigations to see whether you need more medication or not.
2 people found this helpful

I feel lonely and sometimes very depressed I am very unhappy mood every day I have no problem but I b live that. I have a problem.

BHMS
Homeopath
Ask Free Question
I feel lonely and sometimes very depressed
I am very unhappy mood every day I have no problem but I b live that. I ha...
Hello, Practicing yoga with homoeopathic medication helps you in releasing the stress from your body. Brisk walk in a park will help you inhale more fresh air and oxygen for good functioning of the cells and tissues of the body. Medication: Take Schwabe’s Bacopa Monierri 1x/ thrice daily and Kali Phos. 6x/ once at night. Yogasana: Practice the following poses if you don’t have any medical condition or pregnancy or else take an advice from your concern doctor and then only perform these. 1. Balasana: Sit on your heels with your big toes touching and hands resting on your thighs. Lower your belly and chest to rest between your knees, bringing your forehead to the floor. Relax your arms back beside your shins, palms facing up. Soften your breath by taking 5 to 10 long, deep inhalations and exhalations. 2. Savasana: lie back, letting your body sink into and open around the support. End in a supported pose on your back with a folded blanket under the length of the spine to help arch the upper and middle back, and lengthen the lower back. Move your arms a comfortable distance away from your body and anything else around you. Turn your palms to face up. Separate your legs a natural distance apart. Relax your feet and let them roll open. Finally, do a mental scan from head to toe: Where are you holding tension. Release it from every part of your body—including your heart and head. 3. Bhujanasana: Slowly slide forward from Child's Pose to lie facedown. Press your toes and forehead gently into the floor. Rest your palms lightly on the floor on either side of your chest with fingertips pointing forward and elbows bent and hugging in toward your ribcage. Inhale and lift your chest from the heart, pressing only very lightly into your palms and mostly using your back strength to hold your shoulders and chest up. Soften your shoulders. Then lift your hands off the floor completely, broadening across your collarbones and reaching your heart up. Take a couple of deep, slow breaths here. Then as you exhale, place your palms back down and gently lower your chest to floor.
1 person found this helpful

How to cure loss of memory. I am 52 years old and very forgetful. Please prescribe some medicines.

C.S.C, D.C.H, M.B.B.S
General Physician
Ask Free Question
Strategies for Remembering 1. Become interested in what you're learning. We're all better remembering what interests us. Few people, for example, have a difficult time remembering the names of people they find attractive. If you're not intrinsically interested in what you're learning or trying to remember, you must find a way to become so. 2. Find a way to leverage your visual memory. You'll be surprised by how much more this will enable you to remember. For example, imagine you're at a party and are introduced to five people in quick succession. How can you quickly memorize their names? Pick out a single defining visual characteristic of each person and connect it to a visual representation of their name, preferably through an action of some kind. Remember: Memory is predominantly visual. 3. Create a mental memory tree. If you're trying to memorize a large number of facts, find a way to relate them in your mind visually with a memory tree. Construct big branches first, then leaves. Branches and leaves should carry labels that are personally meaningful to you in some way, and the organization of the facts ("leaves") should be logical.. 4. Associate what you're trying to learn with what you already know. It seems the more mental connections we have to a piece of information, the more successful we'll be in remembering it. This is why using mnemonics. Write out the items to be memorized over and over and over. 5. When reading for retention, summarize each paragraph in the margin. This requires you to think about what you're reading, recycle it, and teach it to yourself again. Even take the concepts you're learning and reason forward with them; apply them to imagined novel situations, which creates more neural connections to reinforce the memory. 6. Do most of your studying in the afternoon. Though you may identify yourself as a "morning person" or "evening person" at least one Study. suggests your ability to memorize isn't influenced as much by what time of day you perceive yourself to be most alert but by the time of day you actually study—afternoon appearing to be the best. 7. Get adequate sleep to consolidate and retain memories. Not just at night after you've studied but the day, you study as well. Far better to do this than to stay up cramming all night for an exam.

I have my examination in 3 months from now. I need to keep my body and mind in the best state to be able to ace the examinations .Could you please help me how do I focus and study for 14-16 hours and also help me out with the food that I'll need to consume.

BASM, MD, MS (Counseling & Psychotherapy), MSc - Psychology, Certificate in Clinical psychology of children and Young People, Certificate in Psychological First Aid, Certificate in Positive Psychology
Psychologist
Ask Free Question
Dear lybrateuser. Memory and mind power depends on three important factors. They are understanding, retention and recollection. Your brain stores information according what you perceive and it also depends on past experience. Understanding is the key. The more better understand, the more better will be the storage and retention. Once the brain retain it properly and stores in someplace where it can be retrieved easily, the more easy for it to recollect. So the basic step in remembrance is understanding. Make sure you understand whatever you study. There are" effective learning techniques" to help you. Physical exercise, outdoor games, indoor games, entertainment, hobbies etc also play an important part in improving brain power. Include green leafy vegetables, fruits, nuts etc in your daily diet. Make sure to play brain games like sudoku atleast once in a week. All the above, together, contributes to keep your brain sharp and healthy. Take care.
1 person found this helpful

In my chest so much cough all time. I do not know why ? Because I am smoke very much. What can I do for this? Please advice.

MBBS
General Physician
Ask Free Question
Stop smoking other wise you will face problem. No body will help you out. Get x-ray chest done, back with report. Mean time you can take syr honey tus 1tsf tds, 1tab sinarest before bed, steam inhalation. Saline gargles, it will help you. Thank you.

Hello. i am suffering from epilepsy since 5yrs. And m on medications levipil. Want to know side effects of this.

dpm,dnb
Psychiatrist
Ask Free Question
Sedation, giddiness,headache,letharg,rashyrash,rare sj syndrome,personality disturbance..depression.
1 person found this helpful

I am suffering with ocd what is the remedy ?

MD - Psychiatry, MBBS
Psychiatrist
Ask Free Question
Treatment for OCD consists of treatment through medicines called SSRI and combining it with cognitive behaviour therapy. With both there will be good amount of patients who have relieved from the problem. If you can make an appointment with me I will be able to help you.

Dear Doctor, do we have to keep our mind always relaxed and happy to avoid many diseases like heart problem, diabetes?

MSC Human Development , Hypnotherapy , Special Educator , ms- counselling and physiotherapy, Applied psychology Hons
Psychologist
Ask Free Question
Dear Doctor, do we have to keep our mind always relaxed and happy to avoid many diseases like heart problem, diabetes?
Yes of-course be positive always and be normal in every circumstances.Surrender to god, have faith on him and you will free happy and relaxed. It has experienced by my self if you don't take tensions about anything and shift them to god then he will take care of you and you feel stress free and if you feel like this then you may not feel any physical problem. But it is also require that every person have to die who born in this earth so diseases are the reason for it some time. Except every thing as they happen in your life. May god bless you always.
1 person found this helpful

Advanced Skills in Counselling, BSIC, Advanced Trainee of Transactional Analysis, DCS, Hypnotherapist
Psychologist
Ask Free Question
THE IMPORTANCE AND THE ART OF SAYING NO
In our Indian culture, we are taught to be polite and respectful especially with elders, whatever the cost to us. We must be polite with our guests and other relationships and at the workplace. Women must be never say no their in laws if they want to be happy in their married life. Employees should never say no to their bosses or managers or else they will lose their jobs.

There are 6 main reasons why people hesitate in saying NO:

1. You want to help. You are a kind soul at heart. You don’t want to turn the person away and you want to help where possible, even if it may eat into your time.
2. Afraid of being rude. I was brought up under the notion that saying “No”, especially to people who are more senior, is rude and disrespectful.
3. Wanting to be agreeable. You don’t want to alienate yourself from the group because you’re not in agreement. So you confirm to others’ request.
4. Fear of conflict. You are afraid the person might be angry if you reject him/her. This might lead to an ugly confrontation. Even if there isn’t, there might be friction created which might lead to negative consequences in the future.
5. Fear of lost opportunities. Perhaps you are worried saying no means closing doors. For example, one of my clients’ wife was asked to transfer to another department in her company. Since she liked her team, she didn’t want to shift. However, she didn’t want to say no as she felt it would affect her promotion opportunities in the future.
6. Not burning bridges. Some people take “no” as a sign of rejection. It might lead to bridges being burned and relationships severed.

Well these reasons are not true if you are familiar with the art of saying NO. Remember those people who said no to you and you didn't feel bad about it. The trick lies in when and how to say NO.
At the end of the day, it’s about how you say “no”, rather than the fact you’re saying no, that affects the outcome. After all, you have your own priorities and needs, just like everyone has his/her own needs. Saying no is about respecting and valuing your time and space. Saying no is your prerogative.

7 SIMPLE WAYS TO SAY NO
Rather than avoid it altogether, it’s all about learning the right way to say no. After I began to say no to others, I realized it’s really not as bad as I thought. The other people were very understanding and didn’t put up any resistance. Really, the fears of saying no are just in our mind. If you are not sure how to do so, here are 7 simple ways for you to say no. Use the method that best meets your needs in the situation.

The art lies in using appropriate body language, tone and proper timing. Coming across as genuine, warm and friendly will help to set the tone of the interaction and you will be the winner.

1. “I can’t commit to this as I have other priorities at the moment.”
If you are too busy to engage in the request/offer, this will be applicable. This lets the person know your plate is full at the moment, so he/she should hold off on this as well as future requests. If it makes it easier, you can also share what you’re working on so the person can understand better. I use this when I have too many commitments to attend to.

2. “Now’s not a good time as I’m in the middle of something. How about we reconnect at X time?”
It’s common to get sudden requests for help when you are in the middle of something. Sometimes I get phone calls from friends or associates when I’m in a meeting or doing important work. This method is a great way to (temporarily) hold off the request. First, you let the person know it’s not a good time as you are doing something. Secondly, you make known your desire to help by suggesting another time (at your convenience). This way, the person doesn’t feel disappointed or rejected.

3. “I’d love to do this, but …”
I often use this as it’s a gentle way of breaking no to the other party. It’s encouraging as it lets the person know you like the idea (of course, only say this if you do like it) and there’s nothing wrong about it. I often use this line when I get invitations to late night dinners and parties. Their ideas are absolutely great, but I can’t take part due to other reasons such as prior commitments or different needs.

4. “Let me think about it first and I’ll get back to you.”
This is more like a “Maybe” than a straight out “No”. If you are interested but you don’t want to say ‘yes’ just yet, use this. Sometimes I’m pitched a great idea which meets my needs, but I want to hold off on committing as I want some time to think first. There are times when new considerations pop in and I want to be certain of the decision before committing myself. If the person is sincere about the request, he/she will be more than happy to wait a short while. Specify a date / time-range (say, in 1-2 weeks) where the person can expect a reply.

If you’re not interested in what the person has to offer at all, don’t lead him/her on. Use methods #5, #6 or #7 which are definitive.

5. “This doesn’t meet my needs now but I’ll be sure to keep you in mind.”
If someone is pitching a deal/opportunity which isn’t what you are looking for, let him/her know straight-out that it doesn’t meet your needs. Otherwise, the discussion can drag on longer than it should. It helps as the person know it’s nothing wrong about what he/she is offering, but that you are looking for something else. At the same time, by saying you’ll keep him/her in mind, it signals you are open to future opportunities.

6. “I’m not the best person to help on this. Why don’t you try X?”
If you are being asked for help in something which you (i) can’t contribute much to (ii) don’t have resources to help, let it be known they are looking at the wrong person. If possible, refer them to a lead they can follow-up on – whether it’s someone you know, someone who might know someone else, or even a department. I always make it a point to offer an alternate contact so the person doesn’t end up in a dead end. This way you help steer the person in the right place.

7. “No, I can’t.”
The simplest and most direct way to say no. We build up too many fears in our mind to saying no. As I shared earlier in this article, these fears are self-created and they are not true at all. Don’t think so much about saying no and just say it outright. You’ll be surprised when the reception isn’t half as bad as what you imagined it to be.

THE BENEFITS OF SAYING NO:

Overcommitting by trying to cram too many activities into too little time leads to stress. We are much more likely to get sick when we are stressed. And chronic stress can cause serious health risks including depression and heart attacks.

1. OPEN COMMUNICATION: this way you are able to tell people who you really are and what is your capabilities and responsibilities towards yourself. This fosters for honest communication. Other people also see you as a human with virtues and limitations. This builds genuine relationships. Nowadays working women are clear about asking their husbands to pitch in towards house work and husbands are open about wanting a working spouse to support the finances. This creates space for pooling our strengths and working in collaboration with each other.

2. BOUNDARIES: with this practice you will be able to take care of those people who like to push or boss around other people to get their way. Drinking, smoking, drugs are common ways that children and adults with weaker personal boundaries, get drawn into. Learning to say no protects you from potential damage.

3. TIME FOR YOUR GOALS: You make out time for what is important to you and your vision of life. By saying no to late night parties, I am able to eat less junk, get a good sleep and get up early to exercise. Saying no to unrelated office presentations gets you time to spend with family.

Learn to say no to requests that don’t meet your needs, and once you do that you’ll find how easy it actually is. You’ll get more time for yourself, your work and things that are most important to you. I know I do and I’m happy I started doing that.
8 people found this helpful
View All Feed