How To Make Sex Better

Use safer sex practices. It can be easier to relax and enjoy yourself if you feel confident that you are practicing safer sex. With this in mind, make a plan to make your sex life as safe as possible. If you can, before you have sex, get to know your partner, and talk openly about your sexual histories. Use a condom or dental dam every time you have sex, and for the complete act.

• Only latex and polyurethane condoms protect against STIs and HIV. Polyurethane condoms may break more easily than latex. Use a condom any time you have vaginal, anal, or oral sex.

• A dental dam is a latex barrier that you can use when performing oral sex with a female partner. It can help prevent the spread of STIs and HIV. You can also cut open a condom and use it as a barrier.
• Women should also consider getting the HPV vaccine to help prevent problems like genital warts and cervical cancer. HPV vaccines may cause fainting or allergic reactions in some people, so talk with your doctor about whether the vaccine is right for you.

Love the body you're in. Feeling self-conscious or embarrassed of your body can make sex needlessly uncomfortable. If you struggle with body image issues that are negatively affecting your sex life, then make it a priority to rectify what you can and accept what you cannot. Accepting your body is key to a happy self and the first step to better sex life.

• Try looking at yourself in the mirror and make it a point to find a new positive about yourself each day.
• You can also make it a point to get to know your own body in a sexual way. Women who masturbate have significantly more sexual satisfaction than those who do not  Knowing what feels good for yourself will help you communicate your needs to your partner.

Communicate openly with your partner. Communication with your partner will improve your sexual satisfaction and help with your intimacy.

It can be hard to establish and maintain open communication with your partner, especially if you aren't comfortable with sex and what you want. Think about what you can say and still feel comfortable and safe.

• No matter how well you think you may know each other, your partner isn't a mind reader. If there is something you want to change about your sex life, then it's important to talk about it. If your partner is really committed to you, then he or she will be willing to listen and respect your needs.
• Communicating your sexual needs can even be a good bonding experience for you and your partner.

Reveal what you like. You need to be open with your partner about your attitudes and feelings toward sex. You should also make a point of asking your partner what s/he wants and what s/he likes. Being shy or coy will only make your partner feel self-conscious, which can make the experience worse for both of you. Let yourself enjoy the experience and allow yourself to let your partner see that you're enjoying it too.

• Don't judge your partner for what he or she likes. It can be scary for both of you to divulge that kind of information, so listen to them without interrupting. If your partner likes something that you are not comfortable with, let them know that you are not interested in it without making him or her feel weird or bad about his or her desires.
• Avoid using euphemisms when possible. These are not clear, and can make it harder for your partner to understand you. Use language that you're comfortable with, but remember that sex is not "wrong" or "dirty," and using terminology that is clear and communicative is helpful.

Let your partner know what isn't working. There are times when something you try in the bedroom isn't working. Instead of placing the blame on anyone, use "I" statements to express what is unsatisfying about the experience for you. If you are more honest about the things you don't like, you can fix them. This can only make the sex better.

• For example, tell your partner, "I feel as if the sex is too rushed. What can we do to fix this?" This statement communicates the problem you are having with the sex but doesn't place the blame on anyone. Instead, it shows that it is something that you can work on together.
• Frame things positively when possible, such as "I really enjoy when you do ____ and would like that to happen more often" or "Such-and-such really works better for me than so-and-so -- can we try that instead?"