Common Specialities
{{speciality.keyWord}}
Common Issues
{{issue.keyWord}}
Common Treatments
{{treatment.keyWord}}

Being Woman - How To Have Good Sex Life?

Written and reviewed by
Dr. Ashwini Vivek (Gandhi) 95% (1675 ratings)
Diploma In Family Medicine, M.Sc - Psychotherapy
Sexologist, Pune  •  30 years experience
Being Woman - How To Have Good Sex Life?

The 6 biggest sex mistakes women make and reasons why women make them.

Ladies, be honest: Most women would fail to acknowledge this, many a times when the woman becomes excessively critical of her partner, she is unhappy with almost every thing in her life and is sitting “on a Blaming Tree” basically what us wring with her that is she is sexually frustrated. Such irritability and tantrums may play havoc with one’s family life.

Men, too tend to get a bad rep when it comes to understanding women’s bodies and what turns them on; making them easy targets in the blame game when sexual satisfaction starts to wane. As the saying goes, it takes two to tango! As it turns out, that women too make plenty of sex mistakes of their own. Here are the six most common mistakes a woman makes in the bedroom and what one can do to get the satisfaction a woman so rightly deserves.

Sex Mistake #1: Not Initiating Sex With Your Partner - Many of the women worry about behaving “lady-like”. They don’t want to appear pushy or come on too strong for fear of being rejected or worse, being labelled “aggressive”. According to Doctors, failing to initiate sex is one of the biggest mistakes women make. Generally, men want to be pursued by their partners just as much as women do. Have we forgotten the “art of seduction” ?? Holding onto irrational ideas about sex roles, having contempt for their better halves; also inhibits satisfaction with their sexual relationships. Women should show interest by taking the first step from time to time. Woman should be able to drop hints and suggestions, make special time to be with the partner. The partner will likely appreciate it, and the woman may find a new level of satisfaction in taking responsibility for her sexual experience, something I feel strongly women must do.

Sex Mistake #2: Worrying About What You Look Like - Thinking about how you look during sex; or having a poor body image if your self or even of your partner is a serious hindrance to enjoying yourself and ruins your chances of achieving an orgasm. Don’t think about the fat on your belly or your makeup falling apart when you are in the “moment”. Concentrate on the feelings and pleasure of the act. Most woman require give yourself permission to “Let GO” and feel free to experience an orgasm. Contrary to the common belief, many men want their partners to abandon themselves in sex play, and that’s not likely if she is anxious about her physical concerns. Men don’t notice half the things women obsess about anyway. It’s amazing what men don’t notice if you’re enthusiastic, energetic, interested in them.

Sex Mistake #3: Assuming Sex Is Casual for a Man - We should all let go of old-fashioned notions, such as women are not sexual or that sex is just sex to men. For some men, sex is a very important act. Both men and women find sexual intimacy in the context of a committed relationship; to be more satisfying. Both man and woman can get emotionally involved in a short/ long term relationship. Never assume that a man is not romantic and only woman stands at the risk of having her heart broken.

Sex Mistake #4: Believing He’s Always Up for Sex - Sure, most teenage boys are ready and willing just about any time you ask, but that may not be true for grown men. The pressures of everyday life -- family, work, money -- can zap a man’s libido. This comes as a big surprise to many women, and often his lack of interest in sex is something they take personally. It comes as such a shock [to women] “Unbelievable ! “ is the first reaction many women would have when their partner says they aren’t in the mood for sex. The moment they discover he doesn’t want to have sex, that would set them on a flight of negative emotions, suspicions, or even poor self image. He doesn’t love me any more...he may be having an affair...I have become fat and ugly bearing his child and now he has lost interest ...so on and so forth.’ None of which may be true. He just doesn’t want to have sex at that particular time, period.

Sex Mistake #5: Not Giving Him Guidance - If you do not train them, you can not expect them to perform as to your expectations ! A woman may feel uncomfortable; talking about sex, what she likes and what she dislikes; even with a partner she has been with for a long time. But it’s the only way to achieve a satisfying sexual relationship. A woman must take responsibility for her sexual encounter. No man can bring a woman to orgasm if she doesn’t take responsibility for her sexual experience. Even the best lover can’t know what she needs without her letting him know. However, the good news is that men very much want to please women. If you can tell them in a way that doesn’t kill their ego, they will appreciate it. Your man may listen, particularly if you are quite clear about it.

Sex Mistake #6: Getting Upset When He Suggests Something New - After a couple has been together for a while, it’s natural to want to spice things up with a little variety. Just because your man wants to try something new doesn’t mean he’s unhappy with you or your sex life. In short: Don’t take it personally. For all you know, you may even enjoy it. Remember, one can have good enough sex life, even when some boundaries are set. One can enjoy as much variety as long is you are in your comfort zone."

In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!
1587 people found this helpful