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Last Updated: Oct 23, 2019
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What Should You Know To Handle Your Honeymoon Smoothly?

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Dr. Jolly AroraSexologist • 37 Years Exp.MBBS, MCCEE, Fellowship in Sexual Medicine
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For any couple, a honeymoon is a great time to bond, have some of their first memories together and to take their marriage to the next level by consummating it. This is the time many couples see and feel each other not just emotionally, but physically as well that is in a sexual manner. While it can be exhilarating, a lack of knowledge can actually be nerve wracking and the first time expectation and anxiety may ruin your experience. You can even go for a honeymoon package. Here are a few tips to help you handle your honeymoon smoothly.

Sex tip for first timers
As is the case with many couples, the honeymoon may be the first night time two people consummate or have sex with each other or has sex altogether for the first time. Some of the important things you need to remember before having sex for the first time is mentioned below

  1. Don’t have high expectations: Remember, it may be the first time when you and your partner are getting intimate and thus, some inhibitions are bound to come up. Think of this first time as a foray into something new rather than expecting to have great sex from the get go. Also, don’t pressure each other into being able to do certain things as it will make things awkward. Think of it as a first time experience and let the things come with the flow as they should.
  2. Go slow and experience the whole process rather than quickly getting into penetration: Always remember, sex is much more than just penile-vaginal intercourse and is the whole act of caressing, kissing, foreplay, build up, dirty talk and even the cuddling together afterwards. Go slowly and feel each other and let the tension build. Many couples make the mistake of trying to get straight into sex in excitement and thus miss out on a lot of slow sensual fun.
  3. Foreplay is the king: Women, more than men tend to get excited slower and thus foreplay is really important to them. As a man you need to be able to arouse your partner to a point where she is lubricated enough for insertion. First timers make this mistake a little too often. This is especially true during the honeymoon if the woman is experiencing sex for the first time. Thus the male partner should concentrate on foreplay to arouse the woman which will help in having a better experience during sex. Some of the same things mentioned here are applicable for men as well.
    • Sensual kissing on the body, neck and cheeks
    • Nibbling on the neck
    • Playing with the breasts and then licking the nipples
    • Kissing the belly and naval area
    • Playing, caressing, kissing and nibbling the thighs
    • Playing and caressing her back and buttocks
    • Giving oral stimulation
  4. Vaginal Insertion: Both the partners should ensure that the woman is lubricated enough for insertion. If she isn’t then either more foreplay is required or you may need to use lubricants. Once penetration has taken place, go slowly with the thrusts and if anyone feels uncomfortable when it becomes harder and faster, stop and wait for a moment to re-adjust. Coming to orgasm isn’t the only end goal and thus pay attention to the experience as well.

Things to help you out

Although you may be on your honeymoon and in a monogamous relationship with your significant other, you still need to take some precautions for the best interest of both the partners. Some of these are mentioned below

  1. Use a condom to stop unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections. Also condoms help in delaying orgasm thus extending pleasure for both men and women.
  2. Lubes are your best friend as they help the women become wetter and also help in penetration as well as thrusting. However use water based lubricants as they have the lowest risk of allergic reactions.
  3. You can use natural aphrodisiacs such as avocados, chocolates, honey and oysters which can boost your libido. Stay away from alcohol and smoking as it impairs sexual performance and ability.

Some things to remember

  1. Anxiety about body or performance: For all men and women, especially first timers, sex can cause performance anxiety as well as shyness and aversion. This is due to self-consciousness arising out of body image issues. You should remember that the person opposite to you is there for the long run and thus wont judge you for what you are. Learn to love your body without being too judgemental about it. Also don’t judge your partner for their flaws as it will only hurt them and cause further aversion.
  2. Remember, this is real life not porn: Men, more than women tend to have their first glimpse and understanding about sex by watching pornography. This desensitizes them and makes them think that real sex should be performed in that manner. Porn is made for visual pleasure only. It doesn’t reflect how people can have great sex in real life within a monogamous relationship. Great sex between you and your partner will be unique and hence don’t try to copy or emulate pornography as it will only end in disappointment.
  3. Before honeymoon: Talk to your partner before honeymoon and raise the topic about sex. It can be a great tool for arousal, developing attraction as well as for breaking down inhibitions and barriers. Know what both of you may be comfortable with, willing to try certain fantasies of the other partners and what you would absolutely not be into. Setting these boundaries will help you get a realistic perspective of the sexual chemistry between you and your partner.

Following the tips mentioned above will help you have great and mutually pleasurable, satisfying sex. Preparation and understanding beforehand will help you add a spark to your honeymoon which may then continue to light the fires of passion for a long time in your marital life. In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!

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