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Last Updated: Oct 23, 2019
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The Itchy Penis: Tips for Disguising the Embarrassing Scratch

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Dr. Vinod RainaSexologist • 23 Years Exp.MD - General Medicine
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The occasional itchy penis is a given for every man. When it happens while he is alone, there's no problem; but unfortunately, itches occur all too often in more public situations. In these cases, a man has to choose between suffering in silence and looking like he can't keep his hands off his tool. Taking steps to ensure appropriate penis care can help to lessen the need to scratch, but guys need to be prepared to find ways to disguise or distract from the scratch when the urge becomes overpowering.

Why is an itchy penis so common?

Many men wonder why their equipment gets so itchy in the first place. Body itches are common, but they occur more often in the genitals for a variety of reasons. For example, the presence of pubic hair in the crotch adds an insulating factor which makes the area warm; the fact that the crotch is covered (usually) by two layers of clothing also adds to the heat factor. Sweat results, which can by itself cause itchiness.

To make matters worse, the moist, humid crotch environment is a breeding ground for bacteria, which in turn can lead to further itching when the bacteria contributes to the development of skin irritation. Further, penile skin tends to be thin and therefore very sensitive, reacting to even slightly harsh chemicals in soaps or detergents and therefore encouraging rashes and other skin issues.

All of this adds up to a tool that is prone to itchiness.

Dealing with the urge to scratch

In some cases, scratching the crotch is fine; for example, when a guy is sitting around having brews with some buds, scratching is almost a requirement. But in those public situations in which scratching would definitely be embarrassing, there are various strategies one can employ to handle those itches that refuse to go away.

1. Answer that phone. Cell phones may be the best thing that ever happened to men with itchy crotches. If a guy keeps his cell in a front pocket, he can always make a show of pretending that a call is incoming, and while fumbling to retrieve the phone, he can surreptitiously sneak in some discreet scratching.

2. Pretend to spill something. When that uncontrollable urge to scratch hits while at a party or other social scenario, a guy can simply take a sip from his drink and then pretend that some of it spilled. (Men without drinks in their hands can grab one from a passing tray or choose to accidentally drop a gooey appetizer, instead.) A handy dandy napkin can dab away the supposed spill while allowing the man to obtain soothing itch relief. Those afraid that spilling a drink on themselves may make them appear too klutz-like can opt to act as if a passing guest or waiter has caused the situation instead.

3. Employ a squeeze play. If in a particularly crowded situation, a guy can squeeze between another guest and a crotch-high object such as a table - with his crotch rubbing against the table as he passes by. (Warning: a man should NOT rub his crotch against another guest for itch relief unless he wants to suffer far more embarrassment and social alienation - not to mention criminal charges - than would come from simply scratching his penis.)

4. Create a distraction. A savvy dude can always find a way to get that beautiful blonde he's flirting with to look away while he cops a scratch. Indicate that there is someone or something that she likes on the other side of the room. He can point in that direction as he says "Oh look, Tatiana finally got here" or "Whoa- is that the new Lady Gaga video?!" While her attention is momentarily distracted, he can obtain blessed relief.

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