How To Cope With Severe Back Pain And Have A Healthy Sex Life?

Understandably, the limitations brought about by back pain may produce stress that can damage a relationship. The person who doesn’t have the pain often finds it difficult to understand what his or her partner is experiencing. The negative effects that pain has been causing in a couple’s sex life can sometimes spill over into other aspects of the relationship.

Good communication is critical. Otherwise, one partner may mistakenly interpret a reluctance to engage in sexual activity as an excuse for not wanting to be close, which can lead to feelings of rejection and resentment.

To reduce the tension, try to create an atmosphere in which neither partner will feel rushed. Be patient with each other. I suggest setting the stage with a gentle massage, a hot bath or shower, or the application of a pain cream - any of which can relax the muscles and ease pain. Even under the best of circumstances, back pain may occur during sex. Knowing this, both of you should plan how you will respond ahead of time, so you can avoid becoming angry or frustrated.

When Standing Up Straight and/or Bending Backwards (Extension) Feels Better-

if your partner with lower back pain prefers “extension” then he can use the missionary position, with the woman bending her knees toward her chest. For this to work, the man has to support himself on his hands so his back is extended or bent backwards more. Or she can straddle him (facing away or towards him) while he lies on his back with a pillow under his lower back or he may sit in a sturdy armless chair.

When Bending Forward (Flexion) Feels Better

If your partner with lower back pain who prefers flexion may be more comfortable entering his partner from behind as they both kneel on the bed. Or, the woman can kneel on the edge of the bed, facing in, while he enters from behind, allowing him to bend forward as he stands. Also, they can lay in a side-lying position with him entering from behind.