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Last Updated: Oct 23, 2019
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5 Tips on How to Talk to Your Child About Sex for the First Time

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Ms. Preeti SadhuPsychologist • 13 Years Exp.Post Graduate Diploma In Rehabilitation Psychology, M A Clinical Psychology, Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy , DCMH
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5 Tips on How to Talk to Your Child About Sex for the First Time

You may find it very uncomfortable to talk to your child about sex for the first time, but it’s a parenting skill you need to acquire. Encouraging your child to discuss their sex-related queries with you will ensure that they don’t pick up wrong information from undesirable sources, or conceive notions that might affect their overall behaviour.

Moreover, it will also strengthen the bond between you and your child. Here are some effective tips that will make it easier for you to talk with your child about sex.

1. Be confident

First of all ensure that you have all the facts correctly arranged in your mind. Do some research, if necessary. Set a specific plan beforehand on how you intend to solve your child’s sex related queries. Always remember the fact you are your child’s role model and you need to have the correct knowledge to educate your child about sex. Face all the questions asked by your child confidently, without letting him/her sense your discomfort.

2. Use proper anatomical terms

Use the actual anatomical terms while referring to the various body parts, like vagina or penis for example. If you use any indirect word or expression to convey your message, the child will sense your embarrassment in talking about certain body parts. This will create a wrong impression in the mind of the child about sex from the beginning. You can use humour as a tool to overcome your discomfort while talking. Moreover, this will also help your child to open up easily.

3. Don’t project sex as a bad thing

It is very important to convey the idea to your children that sex is not an act of sin, but it is regarded as a sin only when misused, like rape or sexual abuse. Encourage them to accept the fact that the occurrence of changes in their body with the onset of puberty is completely normal. Also convey that these changes are a positive way of making them a complete human being.

4. Teach your children the importance of sexual purity

Enrich your children with values like loyalty, respect and love. Teach them the importance of remaining faithful to their partner and treating their partner with love and care. Motivate them to resist peer pressure and not to embrace infidelity.

5. Set healthy boundaries

Set boundaries for your children carefully and make them understand why you did so. For example, convey that their modesty should be reflected from their appearance and behaviour because that is the best they can do to respect their own bodies. Moreover, put specific guidelines on what type of media your child is allowed to watch and tell him/her that it is a way to respect and let his/her thoughts grow. Gradually, when your children start showing mature reactions to these guidelines, allow them to make their own choices and give them more personal space.


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