My husband drinks a lot and I am not able to control this. His drinking habit is increasing day by day, he also chews masala and smoking is his another New habit. I have tried everything to convince him to quit all this but nothing worthy. He himself doesn't want to stop this, he promises he will quit but he is drunk the same day. Please help me with this. How can I make him not drink without letting him know it.

Dr. Ashok Koparday SexologistSexologist31yrs exp

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Hi, I know this is distressing. First I wish to inform you that drinking for your husband is NOT a habit. It is an addiction and medical science classifies this as a medical disorder. Do's and don'ts for you: Please don't plead him or make him promise not to drink. It is like pleading a patient of TB to stop coughing. Your entreaties make him feel guilty and the depressed feeling is compensated by drinking again. Masala and smoking are their lame efforts at hiding from you that he is drunk. What then should I do? The best solution so far that I have found is to take help of AlAnon. This is complimentary support group of the world famous AA. AA stands for Alcoholics Anonymous. It is a support group that is spread all over the world. Every city and suburb has a group that quietly gathers on one day. Al Anon is for the spouse of person who has the medical condition of Alcohol dependence. In AlAnon you will get to meet women whose husbands had been alcoholics, but have now quit. These women guide you how you should face this problem and they guide you on how to help your husband quit drinking. The other option, which doesn't work well is to have your husband admitted in hospital under a psychiatrist who will put him under a deaddiction treatment regime. Get help from AA, AlAnon or psychiatrist. That is the way to help your husband and your family. You will require courage and perseverance. My best wishes to you for strength, wisdom and God's luck. Best 

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