Hi, My issue is too much thinking and mostly bad thinking. I think of all worst could happen to me or my family and friends even when I don't want to. My weak point is I try to keep everyone happy and thus I become unhappy I guess. I can't do what I want and that's because I feel that I will hurt someone if I do so. I don't feel energy and fresh everyday and feel like I am very tired. I think everything should be perfect and no one should hurt for any reasons. I want to be happy but thing those happens to me now days I can not stop or not in my control. I feel like if something is not right by someone and if I tell them they will not be happy with me and I don't want that. I see things wrong but can't oppose because they are my loved once. Please help.
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Hello Lybrate user. lybrate-user first ask yourself that. 1. Ask yourself - Will this matter after 5 weeks? Or 5 years? Give a wider perspective to whatever you are thinking. Think beyond self and don’t underestimate your value. 2. Learn to become better at making decisions Put a deadline to your goals. You have presentation to give? Set a timeline by which you need to finish. Instead of thinking what will happen if it doesn’t turn out good, think about how you can make it more interesting by adding more value to the information. 3.Realize that you cannot control everything & Do not get lost in vague fears Trying to do so simply doesn’t work because no one can see all possible scenarios in advance. 4.Surround yourself with happy people, positive people Find ways to spend more of your time and attention with the people and sources that have a positive effect on your thinking and less on the influences that tends to strengthen your over thinking habit. 5.You know you are over thinking then why not accept it and let go of your thoughts Tell your thoughts to shut up. Imagine a bubble of thoughts and burst it with a pin. I had read this short book -buddha in blue jeans which a friend of mine had recommended when I was going through depression 6.Active sport or daily exercise will automatically power your brain to stop overthinking Participating in something particularly active, like power yoga, martial arts or beach volleyball, will have you so focused on your body that you won't have time for your thoughts. - 7.Talk to yourself Sounds weird. But that’s my routine while I drive. Now what’s important is I think about things I need to do at work, about my niece and my family. Thinking topics can’t be negative. It helps in many way. I have stopped cursing traffic. Instead I make use of time to take strategic decisions. 8.and last…. SMILE. There’s something strange about smile, when you smile you can’t think anything negative. Try it and tell me in comments if that helps. Use all these steps to overcome with your bad thoughts first. After that we will deal with your another problem.
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Dear Lybrate user, Thank you for contacting us. It sounds like you are troubled by a lot of negative thoughts which you can't seem to get out of your mind. What is good is you realize they are after all just thoughts. It is not an easy thing to change the way you think, but it is possible. Try to observe - without judging - what is going on in your mind. Try to investigate these thoughts. It takes some time and practice to be able to see thoughts for what they are - just thoughts. After a while you might notice they don't have as much power over you anymore. It also sounds like you are taking way too much responsibility for other people's happiness. You can't make anyone else happy. Only they themselves can do that. It is never going to happen that no one will ever get hurt for anything, and it's not your responsibility to make sure they're not. Try to care as much, or more, for yourself as you do for others. Be gentle towards yourself. If you feel like you need to talk to someone, seeing a psychologist in Pune might help. Mindfulness practices such as compassion meditation might also help you to be more grounded and loving towards yourself. I hope this was helpful for you. If you have any further comments or concerns, please feel free to contact us again. All the best!
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