I am 23 years old. My weight is 56 kgs and I am 5 ft 11 inches. Gender male. I have lot many problems. I was in a serious relationship but its been two years since break up. I was very much depressed wanted to end up my life but I moved on initially but still the past haunts me. At times I feel depressed. When past sprouts up. A fire within haunts me. I feel like killing me or killing all the girls whom I hate. I dont feel like talking to any girl. I dont talk to any girl thereafter I remain alone I make no friends. ANd I dont know I have started disliking girls. I masturbate to get stress free as a result it gives me some temporary pleasure and makes me feel relax. But it has become a habit. An addiction. I also see its side effects. Like memory loss indigestion weak joints and many more. After I knew its disadvantages I try to reduce but what I observed if I dont masturbate for a couple of days like 3-4 days I feel frustrated depressed again. A spirit of vengeance enlightens. But d moment I masturbate I feel ease. But. What I see my semen comes out like water. I am underweight and ill health So my question is 1) how shall I overcome my past the sudden depression and mood swings? 2) how shall I come over masturbation and porn 3) how to become healthy? Whatever I eat that comes out very soon as stool. I need help mentally physically from all side. Doctors help me.