I have always been a shy kid (somewhat unsteady emotionally: they have more control over me than I have over them). I often preferred keep things inside, sometimes knowingly and sometimes unknowingly. Then a few years back, I failed my higher secondary exams, due to which I went into severe depression. I became even more isolated than before. And eventually, old wounds started to crop up, I ended up feeling even more hopeless (partly because my self esteem was close to zero, and partly because of my over-thinking nature. On top of everything, I faced more complications (a few failed friendships, and some relationships). There were not many with whom I could share my secrets with. And when I did, it made no difference, I felt nothing at all. Nowadays I have started to do a bit of part time work, which has helped me tremendously, mainly in regards with having a higher level of self esteem, being emotionally healthier and not feeling too nervous while surrounded by people who are practically strangers. But after suffering for quite some time, I have some distinct scars with me, which I am listing now: A) My memory power has dwindled down a lot. I was an above average student, now I am the perfect example of" outta sight, outta mind" B) I often misread words, I often mistake one word to be another, whenever I'm in a hurry. C) I often fail to notice that I have missed a word when writing something, if I have said it correctly to myself in my head. D) I feel bipolar-ish at times, I go from emotion to emotion quite quickly, without intending to do so, angry to sad to numb to unnaturally joyful. And also, there are times when I want to be sad (addicted. Etc. So what should I do?