I am 34 years old. I'm having affair (sex) with my neighbor as my husband doesn't satisfy me. And he's also not interested. My neighbor is 23 years old. We are having sex for past 6 months. Even many days I have been with him in nights as my husband will drink and come and beat. Scold me. Now my neighbor says he wants to marry me. I don't know what to decide now? But I too love him. Can anyone help me?

Dr. Saul PereiraPsychologist46yrs exp

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You are certainly in a bad situation in your marriage itself no doubt. However, this relationship that you have developed has been under those circumstances, and there are no guarantees that this ?boy? will be able to handle you and be mature enough. I think anyway that before you get into another relationship, you must be out of your previous one. Your age difference itself makes you two incompatible. This kind of situation often happens under these circumstances and will change as soon as the matters are different. I suggest that you stop this relationship forthwith and attend to your husband?s alcoholism immediately. If after that, you cannot live with that person you may divorce him. This does not make this ?boy? in any way suitable at that time, either. But I suggest that you look for a more grown up man who can take care of you and love you, under normal circumstances. Very often one person falls more in love than the other and cannot live without that person: this is something you should have considered, being the older person. Now he may not be willing to give up a free-sex in a platter, and now that he has fallen in love he will be willing to do harmful and unethical things to force this demand on you!!! 

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