I am so glad that you are reaching out so soon. You are all of seventeen years and you have fallen in love and obviously parents will not approve and because of that you want to end your life. If you are like this no one will want to marry you! You have to give yourself several more years before being sure of your partner. You will be surprised how much you both will change and that someone more suitable may be waiting for you. You are indeed fragile. You are very young and have a full life ahead of you. You have turned a lot of anger towards yourself. You must identify that anger, its origins, and why you feel you need to turn it against yourself. Life is precious and beautiful depending on how you want to see it, and what circumstances you allow to disturb it. Sometimes when we are not able to get what we want, we need to adjust our wants to cope with the situation. People who cannot make these changes to suit the situation end up becoming maladjusted persons and can suffer more problems in life. It is our resilience that is a sign of good mental health. Surely you do not come into that category! Please talk to a counselor, either with your parents or without them too, and discuss your problems at length. That person may want you to meet with a psychiatrist
, if it is really serious. Even so, do not give up on the counseling and cooperate with both the therapies, sincerely. At your age you will need to see a lot more of life and realize that you are not mature enough to take your life for want of proper understanding of your circumstances. A counselor will do the needful to explain these intricacies of life. Nothing is worth taking your life for. Your anger is making you have these thoughts and if it is not dealt with soon, you could end up depressed or you may already be depressed. Don’t be so rigid. Negotiate everything. There is always a way, if you are flexible. You must learn to love yourself and your life.