Hello friends. I am Dr Vikas Deshmukh. I am neuropsychiatric and sexologist. Working in navaashi. Nawi Mumbai area. So today we are here to discuss the very important topic in our day to day life that is Premature Ejaculation. So what exactly premature ejaculation is? Simply premature ejaculation is early ejaculation, but scientifically according to the old concept it can be said as when your ejaculating time is within 1 or 1.5 minutes, it can be considered as a premature ejaculation. But according to recent changes, and recent science any ejaculation can be premature ejaculation when it does not satisfy you or your partner. So unsatisfactory ejaculation is called as premature ejaculation, okay. So what are the causes of premature ejaculation? Dominant causes are the anxiety of any, because of any reason. Second facidiety of pelvic floor muscles. Third hyper excitement during sexual activity. You are not able to control your excitement. So how you can manage your premature ejaculation. There are few tips I am going to give you on this premature ejaculation. I hope these are helpful to you. So one of the things is good foreplay. Most of them, most important cause that patient feel he is ejaculated prematurely because his partner is not satisfied and when you female partner is not satisfied you can increase, try to increase satisfaction level with help of good foreplay. Good foreplay excites her and using, by using, stimulating her, clitoris and vagina you can give her orgasm before inserting your penis in he. So the burden of satisfying her is decreased a little bit after using this technique. A good foreplay and stimulating her with her clitoris with your either manually or orally okay. So second thing is managing your anxieties. Try to find out your root cause of anxieties and try to manage those anxieties. If you are not able to find visit a therapist. He can help you to find out your anxieties. Where, weather it is occupational, whether it is financial problem or family problem or a sexually related problem. So he can also help you to manage your anxieties. Third thing is masturbation, masturbation is very helpful, during, like to increase your ejaculation time. When you masturbation regularly, it automatically increase your ejaculation time and especially when you masturbate just before one or two hour before sex, or one day before sex, your ejaculatinon can be increased, time can be increased dramatically. Third thing is a stop and start technique of master Johnson’s. so it is a very important technique. You can apply in a four phases. In stop and start technique, first you should know k where is your point of noredone. Jahan sy apko ejaculation rokna mushkil ho jata hai. To wo point k phly apko rokna hai ejaculation ko. To phly ap musterbate krty huwy kro. Q k hand is little bit hard than vagina. To us main ap jab musterbate karo gy to just wo jo the point of noredone any sy phly e apko stimulate krna rokna hai apny penis ko. Or us k bd apko thora sa apka excitement level ko cool down krna hai, cool off krna hai. Us k bd wapis apko same procedure repeat krna hai. Start stimulating your with the help of your hand or just noredone sy phly ap us ko relax kro to is sy kya hoga k apka time duration barhy ga. Aisy 3 cycles k bad ap 4th cycle main ejaculate karo. To 3 cycles ap just ejaculate nai kr rhy ho or 4th cycle main ap ejaculate kr rhy ho. So this is a practice you should apply every day, or twice or thrice a week. And similarly then gradually you can increase then, ap apny partner ko masturbate krny ko lagao. So with the help of increase stimulation also you can able to hold that ejaculation then, oral sex main agr ap try krna chahty ho to oral sex main ejaculation ko aisa kro gy k 3 bar rokna hai phr 4th bar ejaculate krna hai and finally in vaginal sex. To finally ap vaginal sex main ye use kr skty ho k andar dal k you will try to hold it before your end point. Okay. So ap gradual sensitivity barhaty huwy ye stop and start technique use kr skty ho. Third thing, medicines. There are very good medicines in the market that can increase your ejaculation time, but you should suppose to see your sexologist before taking it. Don’t take it over the counter. 4th things, there are many positions and many positons and many strokes, different strokes, different kind of strokes are there, that can increase your ejaculation time. In positions for example, one on the top position, okay. It is a very good position when your ejaculation time can be increase. Even in strokes, we know only strokes, only one stroke. Tis to and forth stroke. So there are many strokes like rounding up strokes, side by strokes, that can really increase your ejaculation time, so rounding up stroke is a good type of stroke jis main ap ka ejaculation time kafi had tk increase ho skta hai. 4th thing is many different kind of condoms are available over the counter and some anesthetic spray or gel are available but before taking these gels or spray please consult your doctors because these gels can really allergic for some person and for that expert opinion should be taken before doing this. Okay, last and the most important thing is kegel exercises. Kegel exercises are the exercises to strength your penvic muscle. You take so much care of your biceps, your triceps, your pelvic muscles, all of your muscles. But except the most important muscle of your body is pelvic muscle. Pelvic muscle is responsible for your proper Eraction is responsible for your increasing or deciding your ejaculation time. We never give time to strnghten our pelvic muscles. So these kegel exercises. These exercises are given on internet. I will advise you to consult a therapist for this proper exercise or proper guidance on it. I hope this video is helpful to you. And thank you very much for listening to me. And for contacting me, please logon to Lybrate.com
Thank you very much.
So, what exactly is ADHD and why is it important to you?
ADHD means Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. So the name itself is self explanatory. So in ADHD there are three major components. One, is inattention. Other is hyperactivity and the last is, impulsivity. Early diagnosis and management of ADHD is very important or else it can ruin your child’s academic or career. So the first symptom of ADHD is inattention. Inattention is not noticeable until the child goes to school.
Most of the time inattention could be neglected at home. In inattention the child might be procrastinating the things, not completing the task, switching from one uncompleted task to another uncompleted task, unable to complete both the tasks. So symptoms can be disorganized, bahut messy rahega child, bilkul he cheezein yahan wahan padi hui hai, systematically kuch dhang se kaam nahi ho pa raha hai use. Then he is not able to focus on certain topic. Teacher padha rahi hai toh ye choti si awaz aayegi toh uska dhyaan wahan jayega, teacher jo padha rahi hai who likh nahi payega theek se, small small mistakes he’ll make, likhte hue bhi ek word gayab ho jayega, ek word mein kahin ek letter gayab ho jayega, kabhi kabhi cheexein bhool kar aane – bhoolna, forgetfulness is also a very common symptom. Pen bhoolke aayega, pencil bhool ke aayega, eraser bhool ke aayega, kabhi kabhi tiffin, kabhi water bottle bhool kar aayega. This is very common.
- Inattentiveness mein ek aur bhi chhez hai jaise ki aap usko bulaoge toh ek baar mein woh aapke taraf dhyaan nahi de payega. You have to call him multiple times. “Arre beta mein ne kitni baar bola, kitni baar mein aap ko yeh sab sunaya. Agar usko aap kuch kaam bolte ho, jaise teen se chaar cheezein ek saath bolte ho toh who saare teen chaar kaam ek saath dhyaan mein nahi rakh pata hai. Koi na koi cheez hundred percent bhoolega. Yeh inattention mein bahut common hai.
- Second one is hyperactivity. Hyperactivity mein child is very hyper, not able to sit in one place, constant fidgeting, squirming in their seat, fidgeting means kuch na kuch movement chalu rahega – haath ka, per ka, kuch na kuch – bina hile beth nahi sakta baccha. Isko bolte hai constant fidgeting and squirming in the seat. Kuch nahi rahega toh seat pe he idhar udhar apne aap mein hona. Yeh sab who baccha aapko karte hue dikhai dega. Hyperactivity mein aur ek cheez, you feel as if uss ke andar motor fix kiya hai, continuously on the move, unable to stop at all.
- The next thing we can see is trouble playing quiet games like Chess or pursuing quiet hobbies, he can not do that. Then, talks excessively, bahut zyada baat karna ki usko stop karna mushkil ho jata hai. And in adult and teenage, this hyperacticity can be seen in the form of inner restlessness. Who andar se restless feel hota hai unko. You may not see that hyperactivity physically but that inner restlessness is there.
- So the third part is impulsivity. Impulsivity is when the child is impatient. He cannot wait for his turn. Queue mein agar khara hai, toh “Arre mera number kyun nahi aa raha hai hai, kyun mein itne der se khara hoon.” If you ask him a question, before completion of the question he will blurt out the answer. “Teacher answer yeh hai, teacher yeh hai.” He can make multiple mistakes for that. Frequently interrupts others. Do bade baat kar rahe ho toh baat khatam hone tak rukega nahi, beech mein aa ke aap ko disturb karega. Aap ko lagega har baccha aisa karta hai but hamesha agar bacha karta rahe toh this is a sign of ADHD.
Kabhi kabhi agar kar raha hai toh it’s okay, jab usko urgency rahega, jab usko kahin jaa na rahega. Starting conversations at inappropriate times is also a sign of ADHD.
So ADHD manage karna kyun zaroori hai?
ADHD mainly do components ko bahut zyada affect karta hai. One is academic and other is socialization. Toh academics mein kaise ADHD kaise harm kar sakega? For example, if your kid has an IQ jisse use ninety percent marks aa sakte hai aaram se but if he is not able to pay attention aur woh studies mein focus nahi kar payega, attention nahi de payega teacher kya padha rahi hai, books mein kya likha hua hai, toh who padhke apne brain mein register nahi kar payega. So attention is first required for registration. Then, again, when he wants to recall it, tab bhi use dimaag shant rakh ke recall karna padta hai. Tab bhi use recall karne ke liye attention chahiye. Toh jo ninety percent ka baccha hai agar usko ADHD hai, according to the severity of ADHD, he can slip down to sixty percent, fifty percent, or forty percent. So aaj kal ki zindagi main ek ek marks ke liye bhi bahut tagra competition hai, you know that. Agar ye competition mein itna agar bacche ka performance kum ho gaya toh this is very dangerous for the career of your child. So time pe ilaaj hona zaroori hai. Doosra behviour mein, socialization mein farak dikhta hai. Agar mein kahin galti karta hoon ya mujhse koi galti hoti hai aur woh mere parents ko, mere teachers ko pasand nahi aayi toh I should be attentive ki mein uss cheez ko dhyaan mein rakhu. Dhyaan mein rakhne ke liye mujhe attention chahiye, “Arre haan mummy ne last time aise bola tha, mummy ko ye pasand nahi aaya tha, teacher ko who cheez pasand nahi aayi thi”. Yeh mere dimaag mein register hona chahiye, yeh register hone ke baad mein jab next time kaam karoonga, tab mujhe who samajh mein ayega ki “arre haan, nahi last time yeh galti kiya tha, mummy ko pasand nahi aaya tha, ab yeh nahi karna chahiye.” But yeh attention he mere paas nahi rahega toh wahi galtiyan mein roz karoonga. Kal bhi maine maar khaaya tha, aaj bhi mein maar khaaonga, aur parso bhi mein maar khaane wala hoon. So this is a part and parcel of life ho jaata hai, aur wahi wahi galtiyaan repeat hoti hai. Toh patient khud ke ilava kissi aur ke bare mein soch nahi pata. Toh woh socialization mein kaafi peeche pad jaata hai.
Is ke treatment part mein kya aata hai?
First is Occupational Therapy jiss mein child ka hyperactivity kaafi hadh tak kum hota hai. Second is parenting techniques ki baccho ko behavioural therapy mein daal kar ke kaise uska parenting kiya jaaye. And third one is medicines. Medicine is a very important part of therapy. Most of the parents ask us ki arre itne chote bache ko medicines chalu karenge, kuch side effects hoga toh, kuch problem hua toh? Minor side effects medicines ke rehte hai but those side effects can be managed with proper consultation. Aur yeh medicines baccho ke liye he banaya gaya hai toh baccho ko yahi dena padega. Baccho ko sardi khaasi ho gaya, baccho ko bukhar aa gaya tabh aap bolte ho ki baccho ko medicine nahi dena chahiye? Agar who baccho ke liye banaya gaya hai toh who baccho ko he dena padega. So hope this discussion is helpful for you and please be proactive and seek help.
Don’t let ADHD destroy your child’s future. For more information, you can contact me on www.lybrate.com.
Thank you very much!
Briefing on masturbation, semen and sex education
1st myth is about masturbation, most of the patients ask me that, 'Is masturbation wrong?' Or is it hazardous to health? Masturbation se weakness aata hai kya? My answer to that is NO. Masturbation is a healthy way to release your sexual tensions, provided that you do it in a hygienic way, you should not harm your sexual parts during masturbation, and it should not be the only way to sexual satisfaction or you should not prefer masturbation over sexual act.
The second most common myth is, 'does sex cause weakness or decrease your physical stamina'. Most of my patients ask that agar kuch performance hai, sports performance hai toh use pehle sex nahin karna chahiye kya? Aur kuch din sex nahin karengey ussey pehle toh hamara performance badh jayega kya taqat zyada rehgi kya? Answer to this is no, sex does not decrease your physical stamina or performance on the contrary like exercise it can increase your physical stamina, and mental health as well as physical health.
Some patients also ask that, 'What if you feel weak or tired after sex?' I say, After exercise also you feel some weakness or some tiredness, but that only increases your further stamina but does not make you weak as a person. So like exercise after sex you can feel weakness, but that is a healthy weakness.
The next most common myth my patients come with is 'whether you should not lose your semen at all?' or semen is very precious thing and 'should you preserve your semen?'. They say doctor please give me some medicines to preserve my semen. My answer is semen is a fluid like any other body fluid, majorly 2/3 glands secret semen by vesicles and prostrate glands. So these glands work continuously 24/7 to produce semen and this produced semen should go out of body within 2/3 or 4/5 days. So its not that semen is very precious and you shouldn’t lose it. There are many misconceptions like “ek boond dhat ka aur sau boond khoon ka” which is a completely false thing. Semen is like any other body secretion, who banta hai toh body ke bahar nikalni chahiye. So nothing wrong in losing it.
Other misconceptions patient come with is the size of penis, most patient ask me ki normal size kya chahiye? Mujhe size badhane ka kuch dawa do so that I can give pleasure to my wife, keep one thing in mind that only upper one third that is 3 cm of vagina is sensitive after that there are no sensation in vagina. 3 cm ke upar agar apka penis raha toh usse vagina se senses nahin aatey hai, matlab 3 cm ka aagey jo part hai who apke female partner ko feel nahin hota hai sex ke dauran. So there is no truth in more size gives more pleasure, and this is proven by many experiments.
Last myth I will talk about is 'whether sex education can ruin a child’s behavior?', or the child can be ruined by early sexual education. First of all I want to clear that sexual education of child doesn’t mean teaching him act of sex. Sex education to children under 5 years means teaching the child what a bad touch is and what a good touch is, and how to differentiate between a bad touch and a good touch because most common sexual abusers are near ones or relatives of that child. So child should be aware about what is good touch, what is bad touch and how to prevent bad touch. Secondly when they are in pre-teen age the children should be aware of puberty changes in body. Like breast changes in female, menstrual cycle initiation in female, or in males the pubic hairs or increase in penis size. Because if he or she is not aware about these changes there can be certain trauma in them. Like if there is some 13 year old girl, she is not aware about menstrual cycle and she suddenly starts bleeding she will be very much fearful that she is bleeding from her private parts and that will be traumatic for her, so sexual education is very important for teenage. Also post teenage or teenage practices about safe sex preventing self sex methods as well as use of condoms and very important to avoid sexually transmitted diseases as well as unwanted pregnancy.
For further consultation and queries please contact me through Lybrate.com.read more
Doctors in Manovikas Clinic
Patient Review Highlights
I visited for Depression Treatment. He has a gentle manner and a calm atmosphere at the clinic which puts me in a safe space and allows me to talk about my issues. The doctor listened to all my issues , did not interrupt and so allowed me to freely speak about all my problems. His diagnosis was accurate and the prescribed medicines are improving my quality of life. I would definitely recommend him to other patients facing psychiatric illness.
I remember, I read an article of Dr Vikas in the paper and made contact. I consulted him as I wa ssufferingf rom masterbation addiction. In the very first sitting, he clearly told us the problem and the what the treatment procedure will be in future. Never once that I felt that he is getting impatient, rather he has always responded to my each and every doubt with immense patience. I am quite benefitted with the treatmnet given by him.
After my visit to dr Vikas Deshmukh at his clinicManovikas Clinic which is located at Navi Mumbai, I told him about my sexual condition of not able to control myself from performing daily sexual activities even in public places. He understood my condition and provided me with my condition and provided me with Abnormal Behavior Treatment, his experience and advice has helped me extreamly to get over my obsession.
I was having premature ejaculation. I found the Manovikas Clinic itself quite pleasant. I have had this premature ejaculation from quite some time. Finally with his treatment, I am completely cured from the disease. Everything was just spick and span in the Manovikas Clinic. He is one of the best physicians in city. Dr Vikas Deshmukh with great ease handled my case.
Thanks to Dr Vikas, I am totally satisfied with the results. I consulted him as I was suffering from Male sexual problem. He definitely is aware about the latest and advanced ways to treat serious cases. I was panicked, because I never thought I will suffer from male sexual problems like this but now I am completely fine.
While taking anger management therapy from dr Vikas Deshmukh I had a great experience. I think he is a thorough professional. I am glad I decided to get help and he always gave me the confidence that I could depend on him when I needed help. He can be consulted at his clinic Manovikas Clinic in Mumbai
My visit with dr Vikas Deshmukh at MGM Hospital in Navi Mumbai was beneficial for my well-being. He’s very considerate about his patient’s emotional health and provides treatment accordingly and suggests valid details of the issue.
A friend of mine referred to Dr Vikas as I was suffering from Male sexual problem. He is not just friendly, but also is very motivating. His guidance has helped me immensely with my situation.Thanks to him I am much better now.
Ankur Panja Roy
Good and Co-operative.
The physiological process of intercourse involves four stages excitement, plateau, orgasm and climax or resolution stage. Excitement is the first stage which, occurs with the physical or psychological stimuli to involve in sex. Plateau is the next stage which involves much of foreplay in which the partner involved is in physical arousal. Third stage is orgasm which involves the mating of the partners and actual act of sex and ends with the ejaculation of the semen. The last stage climax is the resting stage which most often delays for females and men achieve after the ejaculation of the semen. For those male with premature ejaculation the semen ejaculates too early with the initiation of the orgasm. They lack the control over the ejaculation of the semen.
Who is at risk?
Premature ejaculation is most common for those encountering psychological issues. Anxiety (performance anxiety) is the most common cause of premature ejaculation. Relationship issues, unresolved conflict and having sex for a limited number of times may also cause premature ejaculation.
Can it be treated?
Self-treatment: Males usually try self-treatment options like withdrawing themselves from their partner before the sense of ejaculation, slow thrusting or penetration force and purposeful masturbation before sex. Some may also try the use of extra condoms.
Sex therapy: Sex therapy involves doing exercise to improve the strength of the perineal muscle and increase the control over the ejaculation. This therapy involves Kegel’s exercise, stop – start technique this helps to desensitize the response of the men towards sex. This may also include squeeze technique, which involves squeezing at the tip of the penis near the shaft to hold the ejaculation manually by causing obstruction externally.
Psychoanalysis: Psychology states that men ejaculate too early because of the anxiety and over excitement. Many psychologist states that premature ejaculation can be treated with psychoanalysis, but this is much effective in all cases.
Medication: Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors are commonly used to increase the serotonin level that helps to delay the ejaculation. Antidepressant drugs or topical application of anesthetics like lidocaine are also used to treat premature ejaculation. In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!
Physical intimacy is a very important part of our lives and defines how we relate to others and see ourselves. It is the attraction one feels towards a particular gender or group of people not just romantically, but emotionally and sexually. There is an increase in the number of people in today's world who identify themselves as bisexuals. Bisexuality is the romantic and sexual attraction or behavior towards people of any sex or gender i.e. both males and females. There are many factors that affect the sexual orientation of a person including environmental, hormonal, emotional and biological factors. Bisexuality is not a disorder that needs to be treated, nor are bisexuals psychologically disturbed.
One very misleading myth is that bisexuality is just a phase and after experimentation (usually during college years) you settle for your true identity as either a homosexual i.e. attracted towards the same sex or heterosexual i.e. attracted towards the opposite sex. Bisexuality is not a transitional period. Most bisexuals may act on their desires and choose to be with one particular sex. However, it doesn't mean that bisexuals are not attracted towards the other sex. This does not mean that they are any less faithful towards their partners than other sexual orientations such as heterosexuals, homosexuals, pansexuals etc.
Several surveys later, it has been concluded that women are more likely to identify themselves as bisexuals than males. This is because women have greater erotic plasticity as compared to men. Bisexuals are often prejudiced against and are stereotyped as highly promiscuous and sexually confused. There is also a social stigma attached to the concept of bisexuality. This is nothing more than an unfair social bias.
In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!
Gone are the days when a man is only attracted towards a woman and vice-a-versa. In today's fast changing scenario one can experience physical attraction towards anyone. With the ever widening spectrum of definitions attached to gender and sexuality, we acquaint ourselves with an enormous range of gender notions and understandings pertaining to sexuality. Gone are the days of the water-tight polarities of male and female bodies and their mutual attractions. The society is by and large opening up to the possibility of sexual attractions besides and beyond the normative bounds of heterosexuality or so we hope.
- One of the most significant struggles of contemporary times is the quest for acceptance and acknowledgement of queer identities and breaking all the discriminatory stigmas attached to them. While one cannot really be inveigled into advocating one form of sexuality over the other, the main argument of the movement is to allow anyone and everyone to freely express and exercise their sexual affinities and identities beyond the restrictions of sex, gender, class, caste, race or any such constructed categories.
- Amidst the struggle for championing the cause of free love, there are certain nuances about one's sexuality that have emerged as discrete identities within the larger understanding of the LGBTQ movement.
- Among the others, Pansexuality is relatively a more incipient concept.
- Unlike bisexuality, which conforms to the conventional gender definitions, i.e. male and female and professes attraction to both or either, pansexuality is a more inclusive expression of sexuality wherein one feels attracted to anyone, irrespective of one's sex or gender identity. Pansexuality vouches for strong sexual feelings for those who may not identify with a specific gender and consequently, includes transgender and transsexuals within its purview.
- A pansexual is never inhibited or restricted by a person's gender or sex. Initially coined by Sigmund Freud to describe the basis of human interactions in purely sociological terms, the term was later adopted by the LGBTQ activities to describe the group of people whose sexual predispositions were not delineated by gender constructs. For a pansexual, there is a lurking and consistent possibility of getting attracted to anybody at any given situation. Numerous celebrities like Laci Green and Miley Cyrus are explicitly pansexual.
- However, the pansexual community is constantly plagued by myriad indignities and disgraces. Many have labelled them debauch and promiscuous while others try to sympathize with them perceiving them as led awry and confused. In fact one of the major misconception with regard to pansexuality is that it is synonymous to bisexuality. Yet others deride this claim by stating that it is merely a modern fad with no genuine basis.
- Like it or not, pansexuality is a reality, relevant to a lot of our lives. In fact, it secularized love to an unprecedented extent and really lets nothing come in the way. In a world strewn with hostility, hatred and violence, if a sizeable number wishes to advocate indiscriminate and unhindered love, it surely bodes happiness for all.
In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!
There are certain events which give your husband an instant erection and drive him to the point of becoming frisky and horny. These might be completely normal situations in your everyday life but, they are appealing to him and make him frisky.
Here are a few situations, which make your husband frisky:
The scent of your perfume: Women perfumes are designed to be seductive, which is why catching a whiff of it can tease your man and can make him horny. If it’s a strong and recognisable aroma, he is bound to follow it and playfully cuddle you.
Consuming aphrodisiacs: Everyone is aware of the fact that consuming aphrodisiacs improves a person’s sex life, but very few people know that eating a slice of a pumpkin pie or an oyster can actually turn you on. If you’re man has indulged in any kind of aphrodisiac, it usually turns him on and makes him horny.
The red dress: Looking at you dolled up in a fitting, red dress is enough to turn a man on and run his fingers all over you. A study shows that red (and shades of red) are closely related to arousal and seduction.
When you put on his shirt: A man finds it incredibly sexy when his partner chooses to throw on his shirt in the morning or after sex. A study conducted recently proved that a man is more turned on by a woman wearing his shirt than her wearing provoking lingerie. Thus, if you are wondering what’s making him horny, it’s you wearing his clothes.
Nerdy antics: Men find nerdy antics about women incredibly arousing and stimulating. You might be hooked to your computer screen, but just a glimpse of you passionately working is enough to make him frisky.
Acarophilia: Acarophilia is a kind of paraphilia that sexually arouses a person when the other person scratches his/her back. Thus, if you scratch his back playfully, it might just turn him on without you even knowing about it.
In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!
One of the effects of pregnancy is lowered libido. Pregnancy can tire out a woman and put a hold on her relationship with her partner. Even after the baby is born, a woman may not feel inclined to have a sexual relationship with her partner. Though this is normal, it can lead to problems in your relationship. Hence it becomes important to put in an effort towards maintaining intimacy with your partner in a relationship. Here are a few ways to keep the spark alive:
Find alternative ways of staying close: Having intercourse when you have no desire for it makes it a chore. Instead of having sex for the sake of it, find other ways to be intimate. For example, you could take a shower together or massage each other. Being physically intimate can also be as simple as holding hands or touching your partner when you walk past them. A quick hug before leaving the house for work in the morning is also a good idea.
Communicate openly: A woman is not the only person hesitant about sex when pregnant or caring for her newborn. Men may also feel hesitant to initiate sex in the fear of hurting his woman. Many men also become extra gentle with regards to their partner when she is pregnant. Hence, it becomes important to communicate openly and share your feelings and thoughts. Do not be afraid to tell your partner when you feel uncomfortable about your body or when your libido surges suddenly.
Do something together: It is easy to get overwhelmed with preparing for a baby or looking after one. However, it is important to set some time aside for an activity that both of you can do together. It could be as simple as drinking a cup of tea together in the morning, solving a crossword puzzle or watching a television show at before going to bed. The idea is to give each other attention for at least a little time every day.
Accept the changes: A woman’s body undergoes a lot of changes when she is pregnant. Do not fight against these changes but accept them as they are and roll with it. Be prepared for breast milk to leak or for a little urinary incontinence. This is normal. It may help to dim the lights while having intercourse or putting down a rubber sheet over the bed. Consult an expert & get answers to your questions!
Sex is supposed to be enjoyable but it isn't always the case. If you are too preoccupied wondering about your physical appearance and your ability in bed, sex may make you feel more stressed than relaxed. This is known as sexual performance anxiety and can even get to a point where it makes you avoid sex altogether.
There may be many reasons for performance anxiety. Some of these are:
- Fear that you will not be able to satisfy your partner sexually
- Lack of self-confidence and insecurity about your appearances
- Difficulties in your relationship
- The anxiety about not being able to have an orgasm
- A man's fear of premature ejaculation or taking too long to orgasm
Thus, this type of anxiety is not rooted in any type of medical problem. Rather than medication, a change in thinking and perception is required to treat performance anxiety. Here are a few tips that can help you.
1. Fight stress
Stress in your daily life can spill over to your bedroom as well. This can make sex an chore rather than something to be enjoyed. Recognize your stress triggers and find ways to eliminate them. Regular exercise can be very helpful in reducing stress.
2. Prolong foreplay
Sex does not have a time limit or need to follow a set of steps. Like any other activity, your body needs to 'warm up' for sex as well. Instead of putting pressure on yourself to control or release your orgasm, get into the flow of the moment and take it slow. Try getting intimate with your partner in ways that do not involve sex such as a massage or having a shower together.
3. Communicate with your partner
Talk to your partner about how you feel. Understand that it is not necessary to have an orgasm every time you have sex. Talking to your partner can help ease some of the anxiety and improve your relationship.
4. Talk to a therapist
Asking for help is not a bad thing or something you need to be ashamed of. Therapists are trained to teach you how to be more comfortable with your sexuality and can help eliminate the triggers of sexual performance anxiety.
5. Give up control
Do not hold yourself responsible for your erections or your partner's orgasms. To a large extent, sexual responsiveness is governed by the unconscious mind and hence worrying does nothing. In case you have a concern or query you can always consult an expert & get answers to your questions!
Men in their 20s are more active and possess fast metabolic rates as they can be good in bed even after having a tiresome day. How can this not be possible in your 30s? This is because you have hit your 30s and there is a lot of difference in the peak you had in your previous ages. To understand this change is quite critical, as what you do during these changes affects your overall sexual health.
The male menopause also known as andropause starts hitting individuals as early as 35. During this stage, there is a drop in the libido and even can cause erectile dysfunctions.
How do you avoid this? Here what you can do on a regular basis to keep yourself fit at all times so you can be fit when it matters the most!
- Check your family medical history
- Check your testosterone levels proactively
- Eliminate artificial sweeteners
- Keep a check on your alcohol consumption
- Dump the junk and add more veggies to the palate
- Get a lot of sleep
1. Check your family medical history - Family history is an important determinant to understand the faults in one's genetic DNA. It matters even though you and your family must be living a different lifestyle or live in a different environment, but as they say, it is all in the genes. You can still lead a healthy sex life if you are active and fit at times available to you.
2. Check your testosterone levels proactively - Declining levels of testosterone brings a lot of problems such as hair loss, decreased sex drive, depression and memory levels which is again a vicious cycle. To avoid this, include meat, fish, cheese and yogurt in your regular diet.
3. Eliminate artificial sweeteners - Sugar may not be our strongest friend but it is our strongest foe for it all does other than lessening sweetness in our morning tea/coffee/diet soda but also increases the risk of developing non-Hodgkin's lymphoma.
4. Keep a check on your alcohol consumption - It is okay if we gulp down a drink or two of red wine daily, but if it is more than that, then you can say good bye to love making sessions as excessive drinking can not only destroy your liver and your gut and so on but also impair your libido. The key here is just moderation.
5. Get a lot of sleep - A minimum 6 hours of sleep is ideal as it helps your brain health, manages your stress levels and most importantly optimizes the male hormone production which helps you in a healthy libido to satiate your partner. Men who sleep lesser than 6 hours have an increased risk of stroke and heart disease as well. So take care of your body while you can before it's too late!