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Patient Review Highlights
I am 29years old female. I am losing myself gradually. If someone talks to me in good manner I feel he/she is doing this for some reason. He/she may want to use me. I can not find any positive vibe from anything. Sometimes I feel totally blank, have no idea what I am doing. Sometimes I can not recognize the person or place. Is it any kind of mental disorder?
Hello, I am most of the time in some other world. It's not hallucinations but I keep imagining things like-I am talking to people and they watching me where ever I go. For eg. If I go to a mall, when I walk there I think My self as a doctor and the ppl around me as my patients. M just a first years medico. I don't know what's wrong with me. Please help me. Whats this?
I don't know how to describe my problem. My problem is neatness. Every minute and every second it will be in mind. I keep wash my hands when ever I touch anything. And I have two kids I don't allow them to play outside because they will get dirty. And if I see them dirty I will get very anger I will loose my control. What is my problem and what to do. Please suggest me.
I'm repeatedly failing in a entrance exam. My performance is not bad, but I'm not getting the best result as number of seats very less. I'm studying day and night since 3 years. My career is in doubt now. Little bit depressed and still want to get success in that xam. I'm still trying and still reading. But somewhere a frustration attacking me. Please help.
How can I get rid of Guilty feelings and stay Happy? Some things come up my mind everyday and I become sad due to guilt I just want to get rid of them?
1. Mistakes teach us to clarify what we really want and how we want to live. The word mistake derives meaning only by comparison to what we desire, what we see as success. Noticing and admitting our mistakes helps us to realise our commitments--what we really want to be, do, and have. Mistakes wake us up and focus our attention like a flashing sign that says "fix this". The urgency created causes us to focus on issues or problems that make us feel off track. Working on possible solutions, redefining what we want or expect, or reexamining our values or goals can lead us to more clarity about our path.
2. Mistakes teach us to accept ourselves and that we can be flawed and be loved. We can fully appreciate ourselves, even while acknowledging our screw ups. It is possible to laugh at our mistakes and then work hard to correct them. Most of us have a long history of putting ourselves down when we make a mistake But it's a self-defeating habit we must break so that we can start appreciating ourselves, mistakes and all. People who love and care about us will stick with us through all our flaws and floundering. And those who can't appreciate our humanness can and will leave, which is best for our self esteem. Our not so perfectness is what makes us unique and we are loved for it. So we should give ourselves a break and love our imperfections also.
3. Mistakes teach us to accept our fallibility and face our fear. Sometimes even our best efforts just don't work out. We might do everything possible to achieve a certain result and still fail, again and again. When this happens we can admit that we're stuck. Facing mistakes often takes us straight to the heart of our fears. And when we experience and face those fears, they can disappear. When we are stuck and admit that we can't do it alone it sends a signal and opens the door for help to show up. People, resources, and solutions will appear, especially when we ask for help.
4. Mistakes teach us about ourselves and how to tell our truth. It is natural to want to cover up our mistakes or be embarrassed by them. To feel like we wish we had a handy mistake eraser or remover. But being honest about our failures and limitations offer us opportunities to practice telling the truth. Admitting the truth allows us to expand our knowledge of self-to know who we are. And thus, increases our capacity to change and let go of what is beyond our control. It is like holding up a mirror to ourselves and really seeing. When we tell others about our mistakes, to let them really see us, it allows us to let go of the embarrassment, shame and blame we may feel so that we can concentrate on learning and growing.
5. Mistakes teach us, through analysis and feedback, about what works, and what doesn't. It's a reality check. When we experience the consequences of mistakes, we get a clear message about which of our efforts are working--and which are not. The feedback we get from our mistakes can be the most specific, pointed, and powerful feedback we'll ever get. Many times we can trace mistakes to recurring patterns of belief or behavior--things we do, say, and think over and over again. When we spot and change a habit we may find that other areas of our lives change for the better. One way to gain maximum benefit from mistakes is to examine them through the filter of powerful questions: "How can I use this experience?"; "What will I do differently next time?"; "How will I be different in the future?" Questions like these lead to an inquiry that invites solutions.
6. Mistakes teach us to take responsibility. Sometimes our instinctive reaction to a mistake is to shift blame elsewhere: "It's not my fault." "You never told me about that," Or the classic "I don't see how this has anything to do with me." It is more responsible and empowering to look for our role in the mistake. Taking responsibility for a failure may not be fun. But the act of doing so points out what we can do differently next time. Investigating our role reminds us that our choices and our actions have a huge influence on the quality of our lives.
7. Mistakes teach us about integrity. Mistakes often happen when we break promises, over-commit, agree to avoid conflict or fail to listen fully. Big mistakes often start as small errors. Over time, tiny choices that run counter to our values or goals can accumulate into breakdowns. Even our smallest choices have power, so it is important we pay attention to the integrity of the choices we make every day. Mistakes can be a signal that our words and our actions are out of alignment. In that case, we can re-examine our intentions, reconsider our commitments, and adjust our actions.
8. Mistakes teach us to engage in our lives -- to live fully. We are not our behaviors and we are more than our mistakes. We can remember that our history does not have to predict our future. And then remember that we have an opportunity to go all in--to participate fully. Many people, when faced with a big mistake, begin to withdraw. Instead, we can use the failure as evidence that we are growing, risking, and stretching to meet our potential. Mistakes help us to remember that we are not content to play it safe. That we understand that without risk there is sometimes no reward.
9. Mistakes allow us to inspire others. They may be inspired when we are courageous and make our private struggles public. They might decide to live differently. When a lifelong smoker who's dying of emphysema talks about the value of being smoke-free, we're apt to listen. The same kind of contribution also occurs when we speak candidly about less serious mistakes. As parents we can teach our children that it is OK to fail because we are willing to let them see our failures and mistakes. This gives us opportunities to talk through what we could or would have done differently. These are powerful lessons for those around us.
Hi, I am 16 years old studying in 11th grade. I am preparing for board exams and also attending FIITJEE coaching due to which I undergo a lot of depression and stress through out the year. I am not able to mange both together and not able to concentrate on either of them. How can I control depression and stress, as well as manage the time to concentrate on both these things and excel? Plse advice me!
After lost my girlfriend I feel working, valueless and aimless lifestyle since 5 years. I can not feel better or normal. Please suggest me some solution about it. Thanks.
Is it true that hot / short tempered people are at high risk of getting and having high blood pressure? Or is it just temporary (at the moment that you are angry)? Can you explain the basis of this? What's the best advice to someone who has short temper. How to curb it?
Misunderstandings and arguments? change them into flowing conversation
Conflicts and misunderstandings occur at all levels of interaction - at work, among friends, within families and between relationship partners. When conflict occurs, the relationship may be weakened or strengthened. Thus, conflict is a critical event in the course of a relationship. Arguments and misunderstandings can cause resentment, hostility and perhaps the ending of the relationship. If it is handled well, however, it can be productive - leading to deeper understanding, mutual respect and closeness. The health of any relationship is gauged by how the conflicts are resolved, rather than the number of conflicts between the participants.
Conflicts run all the way from minor, unimportant differences to disputes which can threaten the existence of a relationship. Conflicts with a loved one or a long-term friend are, of course, different from negotiating with someone who does not care about your needs, like a stranger or a salesperson.
Principles that underscores all successful conflict resolution.
1. Both parties must view their conflict as a problem to be solved together so that both parties have the feeling of winning.
2. Each person must participate actively in the resolution and make an effort and commitment to finding answers which are as fair as possible to both.
We may get so caught up with our own immediate interests that we damage our relationships. If we disregard the position of the other person, if fear and power are used to win, or if we always have to get our own way, the other person will feel hurt and the relationship may be wounded. Similarly, if we always surrender just to avoid conflict, we give the message to the other person that it is acceptable to be bullied and our needs don't matter. Our feeling of self-worth suffers, resentment surfaces, and we feel frustrated in the relationship. Instead, it is healthier if both parties can remain open, honest, assertive and respectful of the other position. Mutual trust and respect, as well as a positive, constructive attitude, are fundamental necessities in relationships that matter.
Some effective strategies to hold effective communications:
1. Initial agreement: the other person may be very angry with you and may be having loads of evidence to prove himself right. At that time, instead of arguing your position, simply agree at that time because there will be a grain of truth if nothing else. This doesn't mean that you are giving up your values and principles. Sometimes it's important to diffuse the emotional charge before working out on the differences. Sometimes it's ok to 'lose' individually in order to 'win' together in the end.
2. Empathy: sometimes putting yourself in the other person shoes and seeing the problem from their perspective helps build bridges. You could say,' I feel that you must be very upset with me for behaving like that with you, I should have been more considerate'. Half the battle is won and the other participant feels validated and will be more willing to listen to your tale of woes more amicably.
3. Ask questions: when you ask questions, it shows that you care and are interested in resolving the problem at hand. Please note that while asking questions, be watchful of your words and tone. Asking exploratory questions about the other persons thoughts and feelings rather than probing and insulting questions can take you miles on the way to effective resolution. For eg. 'is there anything that you would like me to know about this problem'?
4. Using 'i' statements: take responsibility for your own thoughts and feelings rather than blaming the other person for making you feel like that. This decreases the chance that the other person will become defensive. For example, 'i feel pretty upset that this thing has come between us.' this statement is much more effective than saying, 'you have made me feel very upset.'
5. Compliments: find something nice and genuine to say about the other person, even if the other is angry with you. Show a respectful attitude. For example, 'i genuinely respect you for having the courage to bring this problem to me. I admire your strength and your caring attitude.'
A rational approach to resolving conflicts
Here is a model that may help in resolving interpersonal conflicts.
1. Identify the problem. Have a discussion to understand both sides of the problem. The goal at this initial stage is to say what you want and to listen to what the other person wants. Define the things that you both agree on, as well as the ideas that have caused the disagreement. It is important to listen actively to what the other is saying, use 'i' statements and avoid blame.
2. Come up with several possible solutions. This is the brainstorming phase. Drawing on the points that you both agree on and your shared goals, generate a list of as many ideas as you can for solving the problem, regardless of how feasible they might be. Aim for the quantity of ideas rather than quality during this phase, and let creativity be your guide.
3. Evaluate these alternative solutions. Now go through the list of alternative solutions to the problem, one by one. Consider the pros and cons of the remaining solutions until the list is narrowed down to one or two of the best ways of handling the problem. It is important for each person to be honest in this phase. The solutions might not be ideal for either person and may involve compromise.
4. Decide on the best solution. Select the solution that seems mutually acceptable, even if it is not perfect for either party. As long as it seems fair and there is a mutual commitment to work with the decision, the conflict has a chance for resolution.
5. Implement the solution. It is important to agree on the details of what each party must do, who is responsible for implementing various parts of the agreement, and what to do in case the agreement starts to break down.
6. Continue to evaluate the solution. Conflict resolutions should be seen as works in progress. Make it a point to ask the other person from time to time how things are going. Something unexpected might have come up or some aspect of the problem may have been overlooked. Your decisions should be seen as open to revision, as long as the revisions are agreed upon mutually.
Keep in mind that differences will come up in any relationship just because you two are different individuals with different perspectives, ideologies, attitudes and perceptions. Too much similarity may be comforting but can be very boring and uninspiring overtime. On the other hand, differences bring change, novelty and an added spice to the relationship. Two very different people can pool their different strengths and work together as a stronger team. Though, extreme differences may over time out the relationship and make a living or working together difficult. A person may then choose to opt out after an amicable 'goodbye'.
I have high blood pressure for the pass 15 yrs, I'm now 39, try very hard to have baby. I request the doc in polyclinic to switch my medicine to the type that suitable to have baby. But my pressure is always on the high side after the switch, the reading is always 150/110. I'm feeling very depress. What should I do? Please advise.
Hi. I just got back on citalopram after switching to Escitalopram on Dec 8 of last year. I was on Citalopram for many years for anxiety and I was pretty much stable with bouts of anxiety here and there but was always able to bounce back. I experienced a very anxious event in early Dec which.
I am 18. I am in a state of depression due to upcoming board exams. Please suggest me any mild antidepressant or any other option to feel better and concentrate.
10 IMPORTANT KEYS FOR SUCCESS IN EXAMS
The key to becoming a successful student is learning how to study smarter, not harder. This becomes more and more true as you advance in your education. An hour or two of studying a day is usually sufficient to make it through high school with satisfactory grades, but when college arrives, there aren't enough hours in the day to get all your studying in if you don't know how to study smarter.
While some students are able to breeze through school with minimal effort, this is the exception. The vast majority of successful students achieve their success by developing and applying effective study habits. The following are the top 10 study habits employed by highly successful students. So if you want to become a succesful student, don't get discouraged, don't give up, just work to develop each of the study habits below and you'll see your grades go up, your knowledge increase, and your ability to learn and assimilate information improve.
1. Don't attempt to cram all your studying into one session.
Ever find yourself up late at night spending more energy trying to keep your eyelids open than you are studying? if so, it's time for a change. Successful students typically space their work out over shorter periods of time and rarely try to cram all of their studying into just one or two sessions. If you want to become a successful student then you need to learn to be consistent in your studies and to have regular, yet shorter, study periods.
2. Plan when you're going to study.
Successful students schedule specific times throughout the week when they are going to study -- and then they stick with their schedule. Students who study inconsistently usually do not perform as well as students who have a set study schedule. Even if you're all caught up with your studies, creating a weekly routine, where you set aside a period of time a few days a week, to review your courses will ensure you develop habits that will enable you to succeed in your education long term.
3. Study at the same time.
Not only is it important that you plan when you're going to study, it's important you create a consistent, daily study routine. When you study at the same time each day and each week, you're studying will become a regular part of your life. You'll be mentally and emotionally more prepared for each study session and each study session will become more productive. If you have to change your schedule from time to time due to unexpected events, that's okay, but get back on your routine as soon as the event has passed.
4. Each study time should have a specific goal.
Simply studying without direction is not effective. You need to know exactly what you need to accomplish during each study session. Before you start studying, set a study session goal that supports your overall academic goal (i. E. Memorize 30 vocabulary words in order to ace the vocabulary section on an upcoming language test.)
5. Never procrasitinate your planned study session.
It's very easy, and common, to put off your study session because of lack of interest in the subject, because you have other things you need to get done, or just because the assignment is hard. Successful students do not procrastinate studying. If you procrastinate your study session, your studying will become much less effective and you may not get everything accomplished that you need to. Procrastination also leads to rushing, and rushing is the number one cause of errors.
6. Start with the most difficult subject first.
As your most diffult assignment or subject will require the most effort and mental energy, you should start with it first. Once you've completed the most difficult work, it will be much easier to complete the rest of your work. Believe it or not, starting with the most difficult subject will greatly improve the effectiveness of your study sessions, and your academic performance.
7. Always review your notes before starting an assigment.
Obviously, before you can review your notes you must first have notes to review. Always make sure to take good notes in class. Before you start each study session, and before you start a particular assignment, review your notes thoroughly to make sure you know how to complete the assignment correctly. Reviewing your notes before each study session will help you remember important subject matter learned during the day, and make sure studying targeted and effective.
8. Make sure you're not distracted whiles you're studying.
Everyone gets distracted by something. Maybe it's the tv. Or your family. Or maybe it's too quiet. Some people actually study better with a little background noise. When you're distracted while you're studying you (1) loose your train of thought and (2) you're unable to focus -- both of which will lead to very ineffective studying. Before you start studying find a place where you won't be disturbed or distracted. Some students like the library where it is quiet and books around you to help focus.
9. Use study groups effectively.
Ever heard the phrase" two heads are better than one? well this can be especially true when it comes to studying. Working in groups enables you to (1) get help from others when you're struggling to understand a concept, (2) complete assignments more quickly, and (3) teach others whereby helping both the other students and yourselve to internalize the subject matter. However, study groups can become very ineffective if they're not structured and if groups members come unprepared. Effective students use study groups effectively.
10. Review your notes, schoolwork and other class materials over the weekend.
Successful students review what they've learned during the week over the weekend. This way they're well prepared to continue learning new concepts that build upon previous coursework and knowledge acquired the previous week.