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For most people, a prolonged sexual act is one of the most pleasurable acts. However, though not might admit it, there could be multiple reasons due to which this might not be possible. In males especially, premature ejaculation is very common, which does not allow for a prolonged sexual experience. There are multiple causes for this, some physiological and some psychological.
Given the private nature of the topic, many would not admit to the issue in the first place. Even with the couple, many would be reluctant to discuss it. For many men, close friends might often be the only one who knows about it. Someone else who has had similar problems might suggest a solution. The Internet, given the privacy it offers, could be another forum for discussion and seeking solutions. So what happens is they end up trying solutions from either of these two sources. However, what is important to understand is that each person’s body is built and wired very differently. What worked for a friend or for another person in some other part of the world might not work for you too.
The first point of coping begins with acknowledging the problem. When the ejaculation happens soon after the penetration, well before the partner is satisfied, it is known as premature ejaculation. In some cases, there might not even be adequate stimulation. While it is a matter of self-esteem for the male, for the female it is often an unsatisfactory experience. Knowing some of the possible causes helps understand the problem and then work towards a solution. Some of the most common physiologic and psychologic causes are listed below.
• Performance anxiety: In many cases, especially when with a new partner, premature ejaculation is very common. However, gradually, with familiarity, this improves.
• The prolonged duration between sex episodes: If the person has not engaged in sex for quite a while, there are chances of premature ejaculation.
• Guilt: Past sexual experiences could lead to guilt, which also can cause premature ejaculation.
• Hormonal: Hormonal imbalances also can lead to an inability to sustain and/or maintain an erection.
Most men experience some degree of PE in their early years when they start off their sex lives, but this gradually improves with age, as they learn to control.
Coping with it begins with one round of diagnosis. If there is no serious underlying cause, then simple measures like relaxation techniques and quitting smoking can be used to control ejaculation.
Talking to the partner and easing out stress during the act also can go a long way.
If these do not help, seek counselling or behavioural therapy. You can definitely manage better performance with support of the partner and the counsellor. If you wish to discuss about any specific problem, you can consult a Sexologist.